European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - March 29, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Page 18 the stars and stripes March Coin mrs modern marriages demand negotiation by Ellen Goodman i have two friends who have just passed the couples a kind of midterm exam for commitment in the the crisis As it often when each part of this unmarried pair was offered an Ideal Job in another these Lon distance callings forced them to evaluate what they had assumed for the past year their desire to be with each neither could be absolutely sure that their own Bond was Strong enough to resist the centrifugal Force of their work in the course of this two were put on the table balanced against one two jobs against one the tangible rewards of professional advancement status against the intangible rewards of a personal the crisis was even harder because my friends Are still in their still Young in an Era when work comes first and often these concocted an elaborate plan of action of two career couple Dom a on sided followed by a time of and then when the crisis had i was not surprised to hear that they had decided to get after they had already done the hard the pair had hammered out a instead of demanding a sacrifice of each they had worked their Way to a place of Mutual the details were less important finally than the pro these friends lawyers in with due apologies to Jackson Browne completed their prep course for marriage in an Era when the institution is really an open ended i dont know quite How to chronicle this new pattern of not that Long in the Peak Days of traditional the family unit spoke with one dominant voice or one decisions about careers and geography were largely a game of follow the in everyday household chores were also divided by nearly every piece of work from Kitchen duty to car repair was labelled his or but in marriages Between equals where tasks Are acquired instead of everything is up for two people with two two schedules and two egos place a much greater Strain on the Day today skills of communication and i suppose that Why the Early pioneers of liberated marriages tried to reorganize their lives with household they wanted to protect themselves against backsliding but also against the contracts sometimes read like transcripts of Legal proceedings for joint custody of washers and roles were set according to weeks and months instead of by but they were now it appears that what keeps marriages Between equals together Are not rigid formulas of but a tolerance for a lot of Giveand take and when roles Are no longer they overlap and open up gaps in the everyday life of when there is no single permanently assigned milk a family refrigerator can hold two bottles or on any Given neither spouse May be in charge of the childrens schedule or the laundry stubs or the social Over regular such As Bill keeping or May belong to husband or but the Only permanent system that evolves is one for this kind of marriage geometrically increases the amount of he does not buy the car and she the Rug they she Doest worry about the school system and he about the mortgage rate they it triples the chances for a bad marriage to flounder Power misunderstanding and Mutual with it also enhances the Chance of a Good marriage to thrive on the sense of joint Mutual i dont know what will happen to my lawyer friends a pair who settled the trial of their remarriage so so surely they were Lucky to find a solution to this contemporary and Luck is a Good sign for any but their eagerness to Nego their willingness to work it out is even More prom it is a proper Way to begin a working marriage in every sense of those Washington Post writers group visitor s View of Managua is not Good by Howard Kleinberg the Miami news Managua much As in the biblical Story of god telling the hebrews to put lambs blood on the front of their houses so that he might pass Over them while Smit ing the nicaraguans have adorned the fronts of their houses and hovels with stripes of red and Black the official designation of the sandinista other political parties in Nicaragua the comm the Liberal independents deface the Urban landscape with sprayed on lettering pc de but the sandinista supporters identify themselves with a Foo Long slash of red above a Foo Long slash of let it be the paint that inside this House is a supporter of the one cannot become an expert on Nicaragua on a visit As Short As i the View from my Vantage Point is not even if the sandinista were to disappear what would be the future of Nicaragua would it return to the Rule of the the same establishment which played Footsie All those years with Anastasio Somoza today Nicaragua is a downtown Managua is much the same As it was right after the destructive Earth quake of 1972 neither Somoza nor the sandinista bothered to put up any new buildings where others had cow water conies out of the hot water faucet and hot water comes out of the cold water Light bulbs Are in Short Supply and Low toilet paper is a pre Cious the official Exchange rate is 28 Cordoba to the but on the Black Market the rate is Between 500 and 600 Cordoba to the a 900 Cordoba lobster dinner will Cost the equivalent of if you purchased your Cordoba but if you got your Cordoba on the Black a lesser a Sells for 300 Cordoba that an outrageous at the announced Exchange rate or 60 cents at the More commonly used Black Market until a nicaraguan could do business this Way he could get a permit to Purchase a new tire and permits Are required for then sell the tire for Dol Lars on the 28tol with the dollars he got from that he would buy a ticket to Costa Rita where he would Purchase two then he would return to Man Agua and sell the two watches on the Black Market on the 500or 600tol rate and realize a huge now the nicaraguan government has limited the amount of american dollars its people May leave the country Nicaragua wants desperately to hang on to so much so that it requires All incoming visitors to Purchase Worth in currency of Cordoba at the 28 tp1 Exchange rate they even get to the immigration and customs despite the Dollar has Little presence in Nicaragua the soviet presence continues to soviet tourists can be seen in Nicaragua nowadays probably part of a Cuba Nicaragua canned goods on supermarket shelves come from Eastern bloc and the unkind St Cut of All the newsprint upon which fiercely Independent and heavily anticommunist la Prensa prints what it is permitted to print comes from the soviet sold to the paper with no Choice by the sandinista government which controls All c Cox new service today crossword by Eugene Sheffer across 41 57 thesaurus 1 christened neighbor Man 6 museum 43 is Able Down fill 44 weather 1 worthless 9 Dunder head phenomenon horse 12 Over 45 Rich 2 actor 13 45 Downs fabric Vigoda Call 47 fireplace 3 14mode Carson 15 dramatist seasonally Forte Jean 49marner 4 at any time 16 mall order 52 language 5 coup Booklet 18 spoke 20 weather cock 21 every thing 23 Container 24 turns dim 25 Pride member 27 Lucas Friend 29 More nervous 31 sundries bricks 35 actor Romero 37 treaty 38 thread Holder suffix 53maria 6 stress 7 byway 54 run away 8 child 55 blushing 9 meal a 56 Okay companies solution time 27 Hill la i1s1ih huh i Anas Kiokh Miata sew huh Theis Kab of feb Ifill Imi Filiai has Hhill 329 to yesterdays 10 Solo 11 Calls to the phone 17 arthurian Isle 19 layers 21 pub order 22 top 24 Man 26 girls name 28 Oda group 30 deep sea shocker 32 Reserve Supply 33 Platos h 34 offspring 30 saws less outgoing 39 take a breath 40 lubricated 42 modern weapon 45 peace Symbol 46 missile site 48 place Down 50 mimic 51 collection 21 25 29 38 44 4t 22 39 18 40 26 23 30 48 53 19 27 45 13 16 36 41 28 31 24 42 149 154 157 20 37 46 14 32 43 10 33 50 11 34 51 329 Hubert Hulbrt p3my9foil s were t Wor Raae to of think vex a should