European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - August 28, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse Page 18 the stars and stripes August 1985 one Way of Check on your children by Art Buo Iwanij were in the Kitchen having breakfast while Huc Wuhl is on vacation we arc reprinting How did you find the laundry service were there by Art Buo Iwanij while to Buchwald is on vacation we arc reprinting some of his columns from the the problem after a summer vacation is that parents of College students can never be quite sure if their Chil Dren had a Good time or Ive taken a Leaf from Holiday Howard Johnson motels and Hilton hotels to solve this in Many Motel and hotel rooms there is a form the management asks the guests to fill out regarding the service of the As a Public service i am printing a similar form that parents can mail to their children after they have re turned to school to find out if they were satisfied with their vacation just clip it out and stick it in with the next Check you Send to your loved dear in order to improve our service at write in address we Are asking you to fill out the Fol lowing your answers will help us in our desire to improve our guest operation and to guarantee that you will come Back a stamped return envelope is enclosed for your were you Happy with the hotel service you received from your other Mem Bers of the you we rent please Tell us where you Felt they let you Down in the Blank space on the Back of this were you satisfied with the meals please rate them As a b Good c fair or d could your friends find everything they wanted in the icebox was there enough wine and liquor available for them when they dropped by were they satisfied with their accommodations when they decided to sleep Over were there any complaints about the room service did you find the House quiet enough when you slept Laic in the morning were disturbed by anyone coming into your room asking when you were getting up was your room cleaned up satisfactorily while you were in the Kitchen having breakfast How did you find the laundry service were there always fresh clothes in your drawers and did our staff pick up the dirty ones every Day which you threw on the floor was there enough hot water for your Bath or Shower did you find your fathers Hairbrush when you needed it were you Happy with the Brand of cosmetics you borrowed from your mothers Dresser did you have enough clean towels every Day did your Mother pick up the dirty ones after you bathed in a cheerful manner what was your opinion of our limousine service was there a car always available when you needed it or did you have to wait until a member of the family completed an errand did the Doorman Park your car or did you have to do it yourself How would you rate the help a Friendly and on the Job b willing to drop everything to resolve a re no matter How demanding c surly and Unco Ope in this respect were you made to feel at or did you get the impression the help would be Happy when your vacation was Over did you find our cashier cooperative and willing to dispense funds at any time of the Day or night or did he hesitate to give you Cash when you needed it did we at hotel fill in your name provide you with the summer vacation you dreamed of did it live up to your expectations will you come Back As our guest at thanksgiving How Many people do you expect to bring with you would you recommend us to your friends our existence depends on your patronage and our Only purpose is to make you if we have done so were very if we have failed in any no matter How we would like to hear from remember our Casa is your sincerely name of housekeeper and director of Cater ing name of manager and chairman of the c los Angeles times taking on the to Wheeler dealer by Russell Baker there is one of those commercials that local car Deal ers pay to these stations to run after it shows 20 acres of cars surrounding a hyperthyroid Man who looks As if his name is you can Tell he was voted most Likely to succeed in High school 17 years and he has obviously fulfilled the prophecy because he owns 20 car covered acres and stars in his own to Phil strides from car to waving his hands and talking a mile a never looking at where Hes but staring straight into the camera Amaz never colliding with any of his the sureness with which Phil glides among those cars without once bumping a thigh does nothing to put me at Case about has he made a bargain with satan his soul in Trade for this astonishing to cunning i for years i have been watching phils lat night car Sale As Well As harrys and they have Only made me feel sorry for my fellow a decent but not very Bright fellow whose Lack of brightness i deduce from his habit of constantly buying new my poor fellow Man that is what these commercials have made me say in the past with his witless insistence on buying he will soon be again in the clutches of Harry or life has presented me with a miserable after All these years of having a subway at my Beck and i am finally compelled to buy a car of my hence my morbid concentration on phils dashing around on his 20 acres of cars without once denting a hell find me an easy Young Phil can you believe what he is now saying ready to Deal he is we Are ready to Deal ready to Deal like no dealer has Ever dealer dealt i say to the to the past tense of Deal is is that a Wink Phil is giving the rest of the to Audi ence of sly having discovered my weak Ness having exposed me As a Pedantic lint picker about Points of grammar he will know How to handle me when i come aint it a Nice Day hell so that i will get too Prissy about aint is to notice Phil adding Vinyl Zed Mink seat covers to the optional equipment being loaded on the car he intends to sell me make a Deal with Phil Lyndon Johnson might have been an equal match at but ill bet Phil would have come out of it with a Federal judgeship for his i know mostly who boast they have made deals with Phil that made Phil weep and beg them not to take the bread from his childrens these Are men with no sense of i sit Here watching come in and let me make you he very it is blood for 1 will have to face him any Day and it will not help to level to it would be useless for a dolt like me to try to Deal with because he will say old buddy youve come to the right have you seen the new Vinyl Zed Mink seat covers and i to phone Upland just Send Over the car of your and leave it at the and ill put the Check in the that Way you dont have to see him sneering at c new York times without a few per manage to that5th50niy wow for aug accous in your Haepung 6vha7ami Moo on Vou almost 60tit today crossword by Eugene Sheffer across 1 Harbor boat 4 sack 7 unite or blend 8 the thinker sculptor lots Steve 11 Fra Grances 13 California state Flowers 16 lambs Mother 17 role for Roger Moore 18 Meadow 19 female red Deer 20 eagles nest 21 the March King 23 Sells 25 actress Sommer 26 hat material 27 Creek 28 Lariat 30 hawaiian Timber tree 33 Arkansas state Flowers 36 prolonged attacks 37 Sandpiper 38 entrap 39 Khomeini land 40 in music 41 neighbor Down 1 delicate fabric 2 employed 3 origin 4 soap ingredient 5 take As ones own 6 dress trimming 7 ebb and 8 Swift 9 fastened to yesterdays Puzzle 828 solution time 24 10 time of life 12 prophets 14 Zola novel 16 it int so 19 color 20 Hill builder 21 ferry berths 22 giraffes cousins 23 presidential Power 24 resilient 25 epoch 26 untrue 28 stately 29 German president 191925 30 islam sacred Book 31 portent 32 request 34 Singer Home 35 anti toxins 25 27 36 38 22 19 34 40 3 17 28 14 29 26 24 37 39 41 20 35 18 30 12 31 15 32 828 Hubert i just got a of etiquette from
