European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 12, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse Grandmothers Don t always fit their image by Olive Evans new York times m footloose and fancy free. I love my Gran baby. But i Don l have Lime for knitting bootees and babysitting " my Limo with my grandson is very special Welly a Kite or iced the ducks ii i m in a bad mood. I Ihrk of him and it s line " these opposing views were expressed by two women who became grandmothers at 39 and 40. Young grandmothers Are growing in numbers As a result of the epidemic of icon age pregnancy in 1985. 513.000 babies Wero Horn to Leen ago mothers Oul of a local Ofat qui 3 7 million births thai year. But grandmothers older than i he Rwm Are also on the increase because their career once led daughters arc postponing marriage and child beaning there Are Marker events in me said or Susan Locke an associate professor of psychology at Baruch College of Tho City University of now York experiences Hal Are supposed to occur at predictable stages when an experience occurs nut of synch it s really nol Quile the same. It s nol necessarily negative but it won t to handled in quite the same to Lake a close look at grandmothers attitudes. Or Linda Burlon an assistant professor of human development at Pennsylvania state University conducted a study for her dissertation at the University of Southern California of 120 women ranging widely in age in 41 Black families in the los Angeles area but i Don l Ihrk Hal what i was finding is indicative Only of behaviour among Blacks she said. Teen age pregnancy is on the increase among Aboul 80 percent of Boh the Young grandmothers and the on Timo grandma less were working Al the Lime of the study. Of All the women interviewed 15 were on Villare three grandmothers were having their own babies around the Lime their daughters also gave birth Many of the Young grandmothers. In i hair Lale 20s or 30s, Londt to resent their roles. For some grandpre Ninoos happened a a Lime when they were beginning to to lion of parental dues and were anticipating a new phase of life the 39 your old supervisor of a bookkeeping department who Felt footloose and fancy free Lor instance had been divorced shortly before her 16 year old daughter s pregnancy Allee 21 years of marriage she had started to Dale again. I be done what i m supposed to do As a Parent she told Burton. Now we Bolh have lives to Lead. I m no longer in the mood for changing diapers " she said she would not help Hor daughter with the child according 1o Burton at least not on a seven Day week basis although her daughter and baby girl Are living Wilh her. The women who became grandmothers Al the Nghil time in their 40s or 50s were happier in their Burlon said. They had friends in the same situation Many had established careers and they had both time and Money to spend on their for Barbara Garber of Sandy Hook n.j., the appropriate time for becoming a grandmother Hung on a specific number. Somehow i did t want to be a grandmother unlit 1 was 40," she said. It was Erma Bombyk today then Are More and More grandmothers in their 30s who do not not fit that traditional grandmother image. Many even resent their new role. They Are pursuing careers and not interested in changing Lapera. Important to me Al the Lime. So i had my birthday and Ihen the baby was Garber s son at 19, had a son. Although she Points out that Don t appear the grandmother Type she adds i always prayed for a grandson. And i announced it to the world and All the things i was going to do with him Sleigh Riding skating horseback but some of the women who Are becoming grandmothers later in life depending on their degree of fitness May miss out on Hal kind of sharing Young people who need Day care for a child May expect the on ume grandmother to fill Hal Rele. She May have a Good Job and want her Locke said the modern grandmother May feel in s nol Over the Hill and through the Woods to grandmother s House we go she May say Well go out for dinner and she May not want to feel that she is always there. Bul that she can choose to be there or not. It s not a question of not Loving but the balance Between relatedness and or Gunhild Hagestad an assistant professor of human development at Penn stale stressed the Unpi Lance of becoming a grandmother As a life event. People do have expect Lions Aboul being grandparents by a certain age. She said and they feel Hal something is really missing in they Are not. Somewhere after 50 people begin to Leel that it s Lime just the Way they feel in a nol Lime when Hoy Are 30" every time i watch the commercial i find in incomprehensible. It s the one that says if 100 doctors were together on a deserved Island they d All choose to Lake Wilh them Iho same Brand of headache remedy to begin with the Island has no Goll course no visible tax shelters and when did 100 doctors Ever agree on anything there s always been a lol of jokes Aboul deserted islands and Al least a couple of limes a year i get a query irom a free Lance Fri fir asking a name five men you would like to take Wilh you to a deserted Island b live books you would choose if you were stranded c whal one tiling could you not live without. It was never something i Dweller on a lol but somehow did t think a Bool aspirin would be the answer to my solitary prayers. Then a few weeks ago i saw a Lel Evison movie Wilh Loni Anderson stranded on a deserted Island and i need never be tortured by doubts again i know exactly what i want i want whal Loni Anderson had. Before she crashed into the Waldo surrounding the Island she wore a peach suit thai never mussed or soiled the main accessory was a Scarl that could be worn later As a Cue Sarong. Every time i Fly anywhere that s going to be my Standard Urs lorm. As she stumbled ashore from he water she carried Wilh her the Only piece of Luggage she was Able to Salvage her make up Case which held a few tins of caviar some almonds hermetically sealed and a Battle of Good wine. There is no doubt in my mind the Case also held life s necessities. A lube of erase Lor under the eyes a night Cream that firmed and a Good hair conditioner for split ends. I know As sure As god made lit lie Green apples there was also a 30-Day Supply of mouthwash. This is really important. You have no idea How often i be watched wednesday. November 12,1986 sagas where some Cowboy dragged in irom a War somewhere duly and dirty lips parched body sweaty tangled Beard and wanted to make love without brushing his Leech. Yubuck who am i kidding if i landed on a deserted Palco of Beach it would be Wilh a Slack o wet Wood mosquitoes that required their own Landing slip the Only edible food Al the Topol a 90-tool tree and an 3 year old kid who whined there s nothing Lodo " and with my Luck i d be wearing that miserable Light skill. The one Wilh the stripes encircling me like the Equator that creeps up on me if i so Nuch As breathe and the sleeveless Blouse that makes my arms look like the Pillsbury dough boy and i have to keep my jacket on it s so ludicrous. As ludicrous As 100 doctors with severe headaches All wandering around a Beach looking for a Glass of water to take an aspirin e Loa Angeles tune Syndicate the stars and stripes Page 17
