European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 17, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Pessary to make beginners feel comfortable and vide All me help they need to sometimes sit Down and make a plan for them or said. She Leola thai Mast people can make use of Tho Vood shop no matter How Clumsy they May think they ire. R there Are very Tew people who can l be helped Ere she said. People can save Money if they want a spend that extra time and they can have fun using Weir hands. Furniture is expensive now and it s hard to Rind Quality  i the digged problem Carver ales in shopping Lor her Milure these Days is the Lack of Quality Woods. Most  sold today is made of pressed Woods Shea id. The person who makes his own furniture is sure of Ihal he s getting. V and the Wood Hobby shop has a variety of Woods available at reasonable prices warding to Carver. 1 i be been doing same or but you can usually Lind Hose things at the pm at a a food Price Carver said. 5 Carver has no Licud Hal different types of people fee in to work on Dif Larent types of projects i older people make tables and Nice Book shelves. Younger ones want to make car speakers and stereo stands. I even have disc jockeys came in to make ferrying cases for their equipment she said. ". Bui the one common Bond always seems to be trying 0 save a Little Money a Tot o people come in 1o make repairs in order to avoid having to buy new furniture Carver said. The Wood shop also offers custom made frames thai Ange from $10 to $40. But it s cheaper if you do it yourself Carver said Money May have been the prime motivator for some who tried the Wood shop for the first Lime but it s often 1hur things that bring them Back. I be recognized the fact that i can do it now. I want o come Back and try something else Reddish said yith a smile of accomplishment. Most military installations Tiava Craft shops. Check Voth your local arts and crafts Dir Etlor. Coping with crisis by Margot Slade new York times everyone has laced them. Life s emergencies Bolh Little and Large the new Puppy Chews whole in he equally new Rug a Long awaited Job Transfer comes through but you have a Mere two weeks to pack up and move to a City 500 Miles away a child gets burned proving the Saucepan was just As hot As you said it was not everyone laces these crises Wilh equal resourcefulness and aplomb. There is a Constellation of personality characteristics that seem crucial to coping without suffering mentally and physically says Suzanne c. Ouellette Kobasa an associate professor of psychology at the City University of new York graduate school what these characteristics Are and which groups tend to possess them Are still matters of speculation. Research in this area More often concerns Large scale disasters than everyday emergencies. But recent work and practical experience suggest that women at least in their roles As mothers and wives often Cope better than men. And trained problem solvers such As lawyers Cope Beller than the untrained counterparts. There is much to be said for having a Well exercised coping repertoire Kobasa said. For her three is commitment control and Challenge Are at the heart of coping. It seems for example Hal if we Are committed to who and what we Are that is i we know the Lull meaning of who we Are what we do and How we got into the predicament we re in then to can see that predicament in a Broad context and Deal with  being committed to motherhood Hen Means Hal a woman anticipates that children will gel hurl or will become such women will have at least entertained the possibility that they could end up in an emergency room with an injured child Kobasa says. The result she suggests is that mothers generally can do what needs lobe done men often seem to suffer from a kind of accumulated incapacity when it comes to health events " said James c. Coyne an associate professor in the departments of family practice and psychiatry at the University of Michigan medical school Coyne saw this in preliminary studies of couples in which one spouse had suffered a heart attack i thought i would examine How couples negotiate the subsequent changes in their lives he said Bui they did t negotiate at  instead the women generally planned the couple s lifestyle changes in minute Jemail even when the women were Iheme ves Tho heart attack victims. Being in  Kobasa said also Means recognizing the limits of our control but understanding too that what we can do  Many psychologists say that having a coping repertory and using it often helps. I have had substantial professional training on How to get to the lacks of a situation quickly to Deal with those tails and to relate them to solutions said Eugene Goldstein a lawyer in new York. Every lawyer male and female has this training and every lawyer uses it daily in professional  that skill can come in Handy in private life Loo. We have two Small children so the crises Are  Goldstein said. A child Burns himself or coughs so heavily at night he can t breathe. My reaction probably in t much different from my very Basic reaction to taking a Law examination possibly initial panic at a Complex question followed immediately by a settling in to read Analyse organize the lacks and to meal the Challenge by solving the  that ability Kobia contends is enhanced if to generally View a Complex situation or any change incur lives As a Good thing. Obviously a medical emergency is a change that is not for the Good she says but if we usually Welcome change in our lives then studies suggest thai we Are less Likely to be thrown by an emergency and by the notion that in its aftermath life won t be the  to an extent she says that takes cognitive flexibility the ability to think in shades of Gray not just Black and White to recognize ironies and to know that life often presents us with the  Coyne says then we might have the resilience to tolerate disruptions in our routine and Are More Likely to have developed ways of dealing with those  the stars and stripes Paga 15