European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - May 8, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse                                The stars and stripes Friday May 8,1987 columns you ought yeah / know Brand Rooney it 13 so much easier to Fin up someone else s House than your own thai i had a great Lime last weekend visiting Emily Kirby and our grandchild Alexis in Boston. For me it was a you ought weekend. For Emily and Kirby it was a yeah i know weekend. You Hughla fix that Bottom step leading up to the Back porch i said to Emily As i put our suitcases Down and kissed her and Alexis. Cati i know Emily said. You ought Lake thai folding Fence thing Down. Of now hat Alexis is old enough to get Down the step without  yeah i  Emily said. I can t believe How much More i got done at Emily and Kitty s House than t do Al my own of the average weekend. Hey  i Sud you ought Rake this place unpretty soon and get some Lime and fertilizer on it this is a Good time you know. Early. If you gel the fertilizer on before you have a real Good soaking rain it goes Down deep and then the grass roots go Down after it that Way the roots Aren l so close to us surface when the summer heat coma and you Don t get those Brown spots yeah i know Kirvay said. I m a Bear for work at someone else s place though and 1slill had t had enough. It would be Nice if you put Down some stones and made sort of a Little Patio Over there where your outdoor Grill is. Maybe you could get some pieces of slate or Flagstone. Flagstone 15 awfully expensive. Of course what you could do you could get some of Fiat treated lumber and build a real platform Over there. You could even Pul some benches on  yeah i know Emily said. Yeah Kirby said. That Gate coming into the Back Yard in t Clearing the grass either. It does t swing freely. You Oughia either move the hinges up or dig out underneath it. Yeah Emily said. Kirby s going to do that.""3 been thinking of doing that Kirby said. We had a tale dinner and after Al the work i d done Aind the place All Day suggesting cutting up the tree building the Patio fixing the Bottom step and everything i was  tired so i went up 1o bed. We left for Home about 11 . The next Day after a Long breakfast it was almost 3 30 . When we pulled into our driveway. I turned off the ignition and started to get out of the car.  Margie said. There s still a couple of hours of Daylight. You ought get started raking the Lawn Sowe can put the fertilizer on before we gel a Good soak ing rain. It s better for the grass if you do it  Yeoh i said. I  and i went in the House and Sal Down to read the paper. To trl bum Mulli Servian a ways look gift Deer in Mouth by Joe Murray in Poughkeepsie n.y., a fellow was driving Alongie Highway with nothing More to occupy his thoughts than How Good he looked in his red  of a sudden a Deer bounded out of the Woods and bounced off the Side of the car leaving a bad Dent in the door but a worse one in the Deer s Skull. The Driver screeched to a halt. Without thinking twice he jammed the remains into the Back seat and look  bad he had t taken the time to look a gift Deer in the Mouth. Had he done so he might have fett i shot breath of his face. Indeed the remains had quite a bit of life remaining in them As he was about to find out the hard Way. To not sure exactly How it happened. Bui i like to imagine thai As he looked into his rear View Mirror he saw the stunned Deer looking Back at  which it was mostly horns hooves and much hollering. Finally the Man managed to Stop the car and flee with the Deer right behind him but not before it had kicked out Lite Back window and turned the inside of the red Cadillac inside  we at that moment As the poor Man mood there hts car in shambles and himself in lean thai i Luck changed. For the  s when a pack of dogs in Pursuit of the Deer caught up with Bun. Even though he did t look like what they had been chasing he evidently smiled enough Tike it the two of them having been cooped up together in that Coupe de Ville. No matter that in Quarry had Only two legs now. All the easier to catch. Thai s How he ended up a captive of the hounds taking Refuge in a phone Booth alongside the Highway calling the police station and trying to explain what had happened i need a Man with a gun out Here he exclaimed As soon As the police  ins Story sounds Loo funny not 10 be fiction i agree. That was my reaction when i heard the tape of the incoming Call As supposedly recorded Al inc Poughkeepsie police , it seemed authentic. You could All Bui hear inc dogs baying in the background. The Man himself sounded As real a victim As could be imagined. Even knowing As 1 did that the tape must be a fake i could t help from laughing myself silly when 1 listened to it. Of course All in took was one Call to the Pough Repsie n.y., police station to find out the Imlah. The truth is it s True according to what i Learned from the sergeant on duly in happened 14 years ago. The tape that has finally found its Way to Texas is famous among Law enforcement officers throughout much of the Eastern United slates and the South. I m told that the officer who look the Call has since retired but remains something of a legend. As for the Man who phoned the police nobody knows what happened 10him. 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