European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - September 25, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse                                The stars and St Lopes Friday. September 25,1987 columns today s crossword late risers Ore listless loafers by Andy room a Early risers arc Good people. They do Ilic work of the world a Tiili  arc Slid in bed. A the things such As cars television is is bars and All night Mcdonald s never would have been invented if Llic world had wailed Tor late risers to get out Robed and inc no them. The Laic risers have the ability the just Don t girl up in Lime to Stan. Early risers have one serious problem. In plagues me when we get up. Being a typical Early Riser i m thoughtful of those who stay in bed and have to have a cup of Coffee As soon As they get up. One they re up i m not too Nice to them Bui while they re in bed i respect their disease. Staying in bed longer than it lakes to get the rest you need is a disease. When i Rise about 6 . On my vacation there Are often other family members or guests in the House. Itry to be quiet but it s not possible. I slip silently out of bed trying nol to move the Springs under the mall Russ and i acad for the Bath room. I m careful to ease the lock Back to its Norma position. I Don t let inc Spring snap it Back so thai the catch shoots into inc Hole in the door Jamb designed to catch it with a loud noise. Up until this Point i be done Well every morning but then come the problems. Being quiet is so dim cult in a silent House. The silence is broken the in Stant i flush the toilet. That s like a Public Audrej announcement. Attention attention an Drew Rodney is now up it is not simply that i m thoughtful i want to be alone Tor two hours. I Don t want to interact with my Dearest friends or family for a while. I tiptoe Hack to the cd room and silently pull on my socks while the sleepers doze off again after their rude Awakening. The minute i Start Down the stairs leading to the living room their sleep is . At 6 . Inc stairs mate a Racket that rip Vanwinkle could t sleep through. The House is just 50 years old and i m sure thai for All of those 50 years every time anyone came Dow those stairs they have issued Forth the same noises. Gingerly i extend the Ball of my sneaker cd foot downward to inc next Stair tread. Each Lime i put my full weight Down there arc a series of explosive Little cracking sounds As the Wood changes position in rela Tion in the piece it is up against. I be tried coming Down Barefoot i be made my Way Down placing most of my weight on the railing and i be tried putting my weight on different places on the Steps looking for a spot that does t announce my a Ascendancy. The slain still map crackle and pop. In deference to their steeping habits i Don t get my breakfast first thing. Coffee making is quiet enough but squeezing oranges or even opening and closing the refrigerator door can create an impression i sleepers that the Kitchen is going full blast and thai they ought to gel up. What i hate most about late risers is they  Hope i did t Wake you i say. Of no the late risers say. We were awake. We were just about to get up  viewers would rather see Tennis Byar Buchwald the Dan rather Black Hole As it has become known in news circles if probably one of the most unique things to have happened in television. This is what look place. Dan was Down in Miami to cover the Pope and Anchor the lbs evening  to Dan s Chagrin lbs sports was broadcast ing a whale of a Tennis match Between lady stars Lori Mcneil and Steffi Graf Dan was informed that the evening news might have to be Cut to make time for the Tennis. Rather was furious and said if lbs sports Cut into his show then lbs sport could do ail the news that evening. It was a standoff until 6 30 rolled around and rather was told he had to hold off on the Pope until the Tennis game was Over. Dan in fury took off his Mike and walked out of the studio to Call his Boss in new York. Now it gets inter aging while rather was in the Hall the Tennis match ended. Bui there was nobody in the studio to present the evening news. So lbs went to Black pitch Black while lbs network executives from new York to key Biscayne were scream ing at each other my to set is on the Fritz after six minutes of blackness Dan came Back on the air with an upbeat report on the Pope. But it was Loo late. Ever since that night known As Black Friday at Black Rock the lbs brass have been scratching their Heads trying to figure oui Wal happened an what can be done about it a source Al lbs told me thai one of the ideas the executives came up with is to station a pit Bull by rather s desk. Every time Dan makes a move toward the door the dog will Start chewing Bis leg a news producer wants to tet Dan sit in the Umpire s chair Al the Tennis open and adjudicate the match on Center court hopefully by calling the matches. Rather will develop As much interest in ten Nis As he has in Afghanistan. Whether lbs will resort to any of these strategies is not known at this time. Rather feels terrible about the blackout and As penance has offered to Wear ten Nis sweaters every night on his show. To make matters a lot worse Nielsen took a Survey and discovered that 25 percent of the viewers would want to watch women s Tennis 20 percent said they would rather tune in 10 the evening news and 55 percent said if they had a Choice they would prefer to stare at a Black screen. Tit lot Angal Timm we for less  be of we. I m Nav decided across i Hal Wixx i thin t Oln n Fil no 36dnwn Tim Irrer Talon 2 health Luh 3.strrnflth-i-Nlng a genl