European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 17, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse Tuesday november 17, 1987 the stars and stripes Arm Lai Icterus dear Ann Landers my 17-year-old son is a bag boy at a local supermarket. He came Home from work last eve Ning depressed. It seems Hal four people were arrested that Day for shoplifting. They were he said about grandma s in our town shoplifters Are fined $1.000 and sentenced to a. Year in jail. Those apprehended f were taken by police Tif to tic � station. Of course there were Many tears and the old folks begged to be let go but their pleas were ignored. My son was just heartsick. Please Tell your older readers who Are up against it that they should not be too proud to apply for food Stamps. Being poor n nothing to be ashamed of and it is certainly less of a stigma than having a police record. Also Lell them thai there Are cameras hidden Alt Over the stores and a variety of secret devices 10 trip them up. They May gel away with a few items now and then but in time they will surely be caught. Please Ann Landers print this letter. It could make a big difference in the lives of Many senior citizens Jerry s mom dear mom trunk Yon for poignant idler let i Hope who be taken strict sly by Readen who occasionally slip can of tuna into coat pocket or package of Wien into shopping bag. As Yon mid they May gel away with it once or twice but eventually they will be caught and the mulls can be heartbreaking. Dear Ann Landers i am living with a divorced Man who has an 8-Ycar-old girl. She stayed with us during summer vacation. You primed an article recently staling that after a cer Tain age a child should not sleep with his or her parents. You explained what effects it could have on the child s emotional health if this sort of thing continued. T brought your article to my Boyfriend s attention. He insists thai it is different when the Parent is divorced and the child does i see her father very often. They live in different Stales he says if he insisted that she sleep on the sofa Couch and closed the door to our bedroom it would upset her be Kaiim die would be up half the night wondering what was going on behind that closed door. During her summer visit she slept Between her father and me in our bed. He tried to Wake me up during the night for sex but i would t cooperate. I feel this is a private part of adult life Hal a child should not observe. Could i please have your help with this problem Shell be Back for Christmas and i want that kid out of curbed. Three s a crowd in Rockford oar Rock Fonfe you in Fai Taa his brain caught to Bis Ripper. Chil Dren wet the age of 3 do not a Clit in bed with adult Mebben of the opposite m. Yon Boyfriend ads Touhuni before be wreck Bis daughter s life. Insist on in he has some irelant Ideal that need to be replaced with Good information. Dear Ann Landers my daughter is being married soon. Yesterday she received a gift from a co worker. At the Bottom of the Box under the tissue paper was a card addressed to the woman and her husband. Obviously that present was one she had received As a wedding gift six months ago. My daughter is Hurt and angry and she wants her co worker to know it. What should she say Minneapolis Dearmon she should Lay nothing. I m willing to bet that sooner or later your daughter will piss on one of her wedding Gifta to someone else. Paga 11 letters in defense of women in combat roles a recent letter disturbed me. The letter Vas from a civilian woman who Felt that women were getting a raw Deal because they were not allowed in combat positions. She went on to say that she had observed Many women in stressful jobs and they performed belter under stress than Many of the men therefore women would be better in combat situations. I was not up Tel Over the classical men vs., women Issue i strongly believe that there Are standards associated with every Job in sift and a St whoever Are these standards should be granted the position to in elude equal pay promotions Etc. I also believe there Are women who would hold up better than men in a combat situation and vice versa. One Rule that i have Learned in my 21 years in the army is that you cannot generalize. Each person must be taken on his or her own Myrril. Any other Way of doing it is prejudicial in nature and unfair. What really got to my gut level though was Hal this Tady gave her value judgments on who would do better in combat bul she Naif never been there. The truth is that you Don t know who will react effectively and who will not spent two years in a combat zone and i know Rve seen some of the least Likely people react with tremendous valor and some of the All american Jock Type who did not. Do not presume that people who do Well in peace time stressful jobs will do the same in armed conflict they May not. The whole picture changes when you feel your mortality Sec your 19-year-old Best Friend die or see your own blood spilled. In Short the dynamics Are totally different in War time. The sad fact of life is that we need a Strong army and that we must be consistently prepared to go to War Al any time. This is the world we live in. My advice to this woman is that if she really cares for these Fine Young women she has worked with then she should get on her Knees and Pray that they will never be in an armed conflict for War brings out the vilest emotions of Mankind and robs them of their nobility and possibly their lives. These Young men and women deserve better than that they Are the brightest and the Best who deserve to live the fullness of their lives in happiness. Sec. Jura a Oliver Nuernberg i have served in the army for 20 years and was on the aviation Side of the army for 15 years. Throughout my service i have often worked with and for females. I must say that the Only problem with working with females is the male higher Chain of command and men in general i have constantly seen the woman harassed by array policymakers. I never had Many problems other than Soldier problems when dealing with females. These were relatively easy to solve since they were Basic be Havior problems that pm 22-100 and 22-101 let me How of solve. Also i watched the aviation Leader grow up and decide thai this is no big Deal just utilize women soldiers As you would a male Soldier. If and when we go into combat we can worry about a Safe place for them. Five years ago i went into Lance. Upon completing school 1 was sent 10 Germany where i have been since. I again went into a held artillery that was trying to figure out what to do with female. What 1 have discovered is that there is one main problem with females in the artillery the policy making so called leaders. They offer females a Chance to go into a kid then lie their hands behind their backs Blindfold them and say you can gel promoted and make a career in this Field. You will no command Iii unit. You will not have platoon experience. You will not Ever serve in critical positions on line unit staffs and Cyl. You have a fair Chance at promotions against the males who can do All of these things. What i hear a Well use women As Long As we Cun and Well have them available in Case our held has to if or Cut Back then we will Noi have to lose too Many of our really experienced soldiers 1 have served under a female firing Battery com Mander. What i also see is that the males were sure women would t be Able to handle it so there was no great opposition to their going into this male bastion since they were going 10 fail anyway. Well it so Hap pens Hal my female commander did exceptionally Well and in Lack has been the Best Battery commander of seven that i be had in Lance. I feel that the other commanders and the higher staff Are now worried that their male bastion Field artillery might not be As difficult As they had boasted. It is difficult. However what does a person s gender have to do with ability the male policymakers need to Wake up and quit trying to protect their friends and heir future Job seemly. I also would like to know where in Europe is a Safe place if we were to have a con Luck if there is no Safe place Why do we allow family members or female soldiers Over Here at All is there any real Sale place in combat i think that what i saw in Vietnam tells me that h a someone s Way of avoiding a real Issue. Females can do anything thai they Are required to do. I have seen females who could not change a tire by themselves but i be seen males who could t do it either so what i had two female platoon leaders in a Lance firing platoon. We Well to the Field a lot. When a Nutce firing platoon gets oui the Back Gate they Ere then on their own for the rest of the Lime. They May see the Battery area once if it s a slow exercise. It we never any problem for our female platoon leaders with our unit of mostly males. We lived ate and worked to Gether 24 hours a Day in Alt environments and never once Hod any gender problems. T would like to thank All females in the army for the Job they have done. 1 would also like to apologize to each female trying to do her Job for what i feel has been undo harassment from our potty making leadership. Women have been moved reclassified and misused for too Long by a leadership which is i feel afraid to id females into their male bastion. The male ego is a very Strong and misdirected tide of our society. 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