European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - December 9, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse Page 19 the stars and stripes wednesday. December 9,1967 columns of for an honest receptionist Brand Rooney when you go through the office door into the wait ing room there s usually a receptionist it Lind the desk. Sometimes she s behind a Glass partition because the also answers the phones. I have never seen a male receptionist and As a male i resent it May i help you the recent Ionita says Nice As Pic just As if Jhc really wants to help you. You know darn Well she Hales you but she tries la act As if she s help ing. Vou can Lell she hates you became if she did Thale you she would t make you feel As though you did t have any business there. After inking your name she says. Please Sildon she does t say in in a Nice Way As though she wants you to be comfortable. She do cart l mean in when she says it s More of an order she s giving. Sit Down is what she s really saying. Very often 1 Don l want to Sil Down. 1 Don l feet like silting Down i m not lir cd. Whether it s the office of a dentist a lawyer or a tax account Ian i m More Al to be nervous than lir cd 1 Don t want to give receptionists the idea i m re Laid either. I Don i want them to think Lime does t Mailer la me and they can keep me wailing As Long As Hwy feel Ike it once icy have my weight off my of Tel. That s Why i always remain standing. Gradually a clearly visible tension mounts Between me and the receptionist until she reluctantly admits that the person i be come to see will Sec me. You can Tell that if she had her Way 1 would t get in until i dam Well sat Down the Way she told me to. I Don t know Why receptionists whose Job ought to be to make people feel at Home Are so unfriendly. They have a Way of making you feel unwanted every Lime. Receptionists must practice Jii Home making people fee unwanted. They All have certain phrases they use. Whale Sidisin reference to they ask if you wanted to talk to a receptionist about something you d Hare made he appointment with her in the first place. I is none of her business what you want to talk to Terboss about maytx1 you re someone who wants the Job she has. How would tha sound if you told her that yes. I d like Toi Alk to your Boss about getting your Job. You re such a sourpuss that he s trying to find that s what i always feel like saving receptionist have a Hundred unfriendly ways of Greet ing people who come through the door. Do you have an appointment May i say who s calling what does she mean May i say. .7" Why is she being so condescending Why does t she come right out and ask what s your name i d rather find an armed guard at the door than he average receptionist. At least i know where i stand with an armed guard. He does t give me a lot of artificial says you can l go in there. the receptionist says ill Sec if or. Jones is thai s what she says even though she knows darn Well or. Jones is in because she was Silling at the desk when he showed up for work and she has seen him go to he Coffee machine twice and the bathroom once since then. Just once i d like to be confronted with an honest receptionist. I i d say As i came in. De Jones around yeah my Ideal receptionist would say he spoofing off somewhere Back can talk to him let me see if he s off the phone with Hii wife yet. He spent Chr Lasi hour talking to the school principal about one Oft is kids and ties having an awful Lime collecting from an insurance company on a car lie cracked up last week. I la Sec whal he s doing you never find a receptionist like that re All the same. They ought to be called reject my old Friend and classmate Phil Greene used to enjoy complaining in the presence of women about How unfair he thought it was thai the Shower areas in women s locker rooms were divided into stalls while the showers in men locker rooms were open. Phil for inc Sake of argument failed to Sec Why women had any More right to privacy when showering in a locker room than men. 1 was in i King about Phil while showering after play ing Tennis on an indoor court in new York. There have been a couple of locker rooms in my life that have been among lie most pleasant rooms i be Ever known i Here s something Good about locker rooms. I like inc atmosphere and the camaraderie. I even like the s an openness about locker rooms that belies inc word if clothes Are locked up minds arc usually oper re. There Aren l Many secrets. There s a Widt and unusual assortment of male Bod ies in any locker room i be Ever been in. They re in various stages of dress and undress ranging All the Way from neckties to naked and no one stands out As funny because everyone looks a Little funny. Nowhere else Isth human body so accepted the Way in is a there. It draws no attention to itself. The Good nature Post or pre game chatter in a locker room is easy fun and while i be heard vulgar or profane talk referred to As locker room language i be never heard much of that in a locker room. 1 took a Long hot Shower this morning. It Felt Good and i got to thinking about other Small pleasures. So Many things arc unpleasant it s a Good idea to consider the things you like once in a while. I also i Ike a warm bed on a cold night. Unfortunately there Are no cold Beds on warm nights. A full tank of Gas. Peanut butter on hoi Rye bread last for lunch on saturdays. Nights when there s nothing Good on television Soi can read without feeling i m missing something. Finding a parking space near inc Entrance to Astore that in t reserved for the handicapped. 9 Silling Down Wilh a newspaper. Waking l a looking at the clock and finding 1 still have an hour and 20 minutes to sleep. Old friends. Tonight i think i la Call Phil and Tell him 1 support his position. Cd Tulburt Media ski neb acho8s 88 it precedes 07 soap 1 they get fold or hone bar by Eugeta a Beffer 10 zone Ihk a slapped in some b8 actor old movie 40 the drawn Doug us hey kid 69 abound for one 41 Pool in Down 8 Swedlin Scotland Rock group 49 author 12 wild of levin13 commotion 46 him 14 Schulah 47 discount 01 chios82 Wood thnwh64 letter phrase is solemn wonder 8 distribute 4 dinner course Bersold 7 befitting King 9 hotel employee rotation uni 2x my. 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