European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - May 19, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Columns nobody is immune to the evils of pornography by Dave Barry  newspapers toddy we re Gurny try income very alarmed about pornography a porn harm that threatens la cause the very Alka Sclufer i Tablet of this nation s morality to dissolve in the Lap Walcer of lust. The magnitude of Ihn problem became evident a couple of years so when . Attorney general erf scar face Meese took time out from his Busy schedule of sprinting through swamp just ahead of police dogs to appoint a distinguished Federal commission on pornography. The panel spent months pouring Over Ftp Ilia books and photographs before emitting a Rei curl that called on Federal slate and local authorities to abandon Petty Jurist Illonal differences and coordinate their resources As part of an intensive nationwide of Furt to thrust their lust crazed bodies together again and until they. So we can ice  nol even distinguished Federal commissioners Are immune to pornography. Nobody is. Look at the tragic Story of the unbelievably Rev Jimmy Swaggart. Here was a Man who become the nation s no. 1 televised Christian thanks to a rare combination of 11 sincerity and 2 hair. The Rev or  had become a Man whose vast electronic flock depended on him for guidance on such Complex theological issues As How much of a love offering to Send in How often to Send it in whether to put it on visa Etc. We now find ourselves reacting with Shock and horror and occasional bursts of uncontrolled drooling laughter to the discovery that this very same Man was regularly driving his luxury Christian automobile to the kind of Motel where you would need a military flame thrower to sterilize the Bedspread where he paid a fallen woman to assume explicitly non religious poses poses that moral persons like ourselves can t even imagine at least nol until we get hold of the Une Issue of Penl hoist Magazine which we understand is going to feature pictures of this woman As pan of its ongoing vigilant Effort to keep the voting Public informed on the a or new makers of the Day and what they look like Stark naked. Nol of course thai we moral persons would dream of actually bringing this Type of Magazine into our Homes. No we will follow the same moral procedure we followed with previous new makers such As Vanessa Williams Essica Hahn Roxanne pulitzer and Margaret Thatcher namely we will sidle into the newsstand and pretend to be examining some Magazine like computer week monthly and then when nobody is looking we will real Quick grab a Penl nouse and flip through it until we have satisfied our appetite for current events. Bui even with this kind of vigilance our Homes Are not Safe from pornography. I found this out when i went to the video store and rented what i though was a of Coly mouse cartoon for my son then age 5. It said mighty mouse right an the outside plastic Box and i did t bather to look Al the cassette itself. I just stuck it into the Var hit the play Button and walked out of he room leaving my son sitting in front of the television set eating a Nice wholesome bowl of warmed up zoo Roni. You can imagine my Surprise when maybe three minutes later i happened to glance Back in and there on the screen instead of whimsical heartwarming animated critters were these two extremely realistic women fortunately nol quite naked yet but definitely Hilling ii off one of them was saying to the other ooh you re to Petite of course by this time i was making an airborne horizontal cartoon style hive toward the Var and fortunately i was Able to hit the Slop Button before my son was exposed to any further bad dialogue. He was disappointed about not seeing Mir july mouse but not nearly As disappointed i bet As the person who got our tape by mistake. I like to think in was some Guy with a hot Date trying to gel her in the mood and he slipped his rental Casselle into the Var and he turned toward her arching his eyebrows suggestively and suddenly the room was filled with the sound of Misler Troubb never hangs around when a hears this mighty sound Hee Evre i come to save the  Means that mighty mouse n