European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - March 14, 1989, Darmstadt, Hesse Tuesday March 14, 1s89 the stars and stripes Page 11 dear Ann Landers there is a Furcal Deal of Good sense in inc idler from Tennes see but id me assure you that jail docs indeed deter drink Drivers. 1 speak from experience. I am a Middle aged Middle in come divorced Molher who was arrested twice for driving drunk. Thank god i never had an Acci Dent. 1 was slopped both times tors caving. ". The first Lime i lost my License ill and was fined. 1 received a 24. Hour jail sentence. It did t bother me much because no one knew about it. The second Lime was a different Story. I was sentenced to 60 Days in jail i lost my Driver s License for a year and i was fined $2,000. The Public humiliation and the hell i went through to make arrangements Tor my child s care while i was in jail quit drinking forever my companions for 60 Days were prison guards prostitutes thieves drug addicts and a woman who was charged with murder. Two female acquaintance who also served 60 Days for driving drunk said the jail experience was so miserable that they would never drive again after having even one drink. My Story gets worse t experienced the anger Dis Trust and loss of rep Cal of my then 1 a year Ltd son. He still throws it up to me that i served time in jail. My father was an alcoholic. I am one. You must 21 to drink in Arizona. My son just turned is and guess what. He drinks illegally. Look out. Phoenix. He Drieci. Sign favor of jail for drunk. Drivers dear in favor of jail thanks for the testimonial. I can see How two months in the lockup would make a big difference. Now about your son what Are you waiting for a serious Accident that Hoy has probably inherited inc family sickness and needs counselling. Please see that " letters continue motherhood debate dear Ann Landers. In a recent column you printed a letter from a woman who was heartsick after learning that she had tested positive. For the aids virus. " please please Tell her to be tested am a 25-year-old woman who was not As careful As i should have been about choosing my bed partners. When a former Lover told me that he had aids 1 was petrified and immediately took the Western. Boot lest. The results were positive. That was december of 1986. It would be impossible for me to describe the panic. I became violently ill had a 101-Defiree temperature night sweats and hallucinations i was certain that this was the Onset of the disease and that i was doomed. A Friend suggested that i be tested again this Lime with the el1sa, inc most accurate of the tests. The Elisa Canie out negative just to make sure i look it again two weeks later again negative i Hale to admit it Ann but thai hideous made me a much better person 1 am far More compassionate and less judgmental value life now in a Way that i never did before i am not telling any. More aids jokes and i am no longer sleeping around. Nameless in Dallas dear Dallus thank you for pointing out that tests can go awry and labs a Muke mistakes. The Elba a Ordino to the experts is he most reliable aids test to Date. Thanks too. Far showing us How it la to Sallile to turn n nightmarish ordeal into 11 posit he cow Renee and make us Teller than a were before. Lot fat to an two of " i o i wanted to stand and cheer after Reading col. Clap per s recent letter. His perception of the breakdown of the american family unit As motherhood is disparaged in favor of the supposed fulfilment of the workplace and Wanton materialism was right on the Mark. The wilfully neglected Clement in our society s March toward liberation has been As always children. They have neither Vole nor influence and so Are left behind when social engineers draw up their utopian blueprints. Thank you doctor Clapper for reminding us thai children will never receive the kind of care irom professionals that Only a Mother could care to give. Petty officer 3rd class Michael a Neu filing Athens Greece concerning the editor s note to the recent letter expert decries fall in role of motherhood " while the stars and stripes bookstores do not carry the books on parenting cited by the letter s author the Usa eur Library program docs have Selma Frai Bere s books the Maic years and every child s Birthright in its collections. In addition to the titles recommended in inc letter Usa eur Library databases show 86 other related books on parenting covering All major concerns of parents today e.g., shared parenting single parents working mothers children and divorce adolescence exceptional children As Well As general handbooks for parents ". -. -.-. The Usa eur Library program has also published a resource guide entitled the military family which lists books Magazine articles and audiovisual materials pertaining to the special issues and problems military families face interested readers Are invited to visit their Community libraries and request these materials. The Library staff will be glad to help. I the books Are not available locally they will be obtained through into Library loan. Al these books arc available for checkout free of charge to Library patrons an important Benefit since Many concerned parents might not have inc extra Money to invest in these books even if they were Avail Able at local bookstores. Left Briard librarian Heidelberg West Germany i would like to thank or. Clapper for his letter concerning motherhood. He made some very Good Points about inc role of the Mother in a family. I m sure he will get a lot of criticism from working moms and i wanted him to know that there Are still some of us out Here who believe strongly in the traditional have five children. I Lake my Job at Home very seriously. After All what could be More important than helping to shape the lives and character of these Little ones who have been Given to us to raise t also Don t believe that the most important part of this Job is Over by the Lime they arc 4, 5 or 6 years old. Some parents believe that because this is the age that the state says the child should Start school that it is some kind of cutoff print in the child s life that they Don t need their Mother As much anymore and society has them brainwashed into thinking they Aren t Quali fied to teach them anything from then on anyway. The writer uses Points out of or. Moore s books that we arc pushing Early schooling on children at younger and younger Ages. Sure children want to learn when they arc very Young but we must remember that their attention spans arc Short and whal they really need to do is learn through imagination play and exploration of their world. It is Nice for a Parent to be Able to say my 2-Ycar-old can say All his ads and is in the ton of his class at but what difference will it make to that 2-year-old when he is 10, except that maybe he will be sick of school because he was pushed out of his childhood too Early i do realize that staying Home with your children can be Tough especially when the world is proclaiming the benefits of self fulfilment. A career will make you feel intelligent you can make important decisions others will respect you you won t be wasting your Lime you will be doing something important. I can experience that at Home. My husband and children to think i m intelligent and respect me. I Don t waste my Lime and i make important decisions All Day staying at Home can be what you make of it. It is a Challenge. Some Days Are Good and others arc awful i m sure most jobs Are that Way. It is a fact that not All mothers have a Choice As to whether or not they can stay at Home. I am very Fortu Nate that my husband sees this As a priority and is very supportive. He understands that my Job As a Home maker is just As important As his role As provider some husbands May not feel that Way and prefer their wives to work out of the Home. There arc some Moth ers who arc divorced or widowed. They have a very difficult Job because they Are both homemaker and provider. They need All the support we can give them. There arc also some single mothers who have decided to have their baby and raise it by themselves instead of having an abortion it is so sad that in our world a Mother even has to make thai Choice about her child. After her baby is born she along with the other work ing moms will have to find child care. I Hope that they can find Quality care in a Loving environment. I did t write this letter to say that stay Al Homo. Moms Are better than working moms. I am saying that being a Mother and Nom maker is a very important and honorable position and we should t let society make us feel like we can t possibly be fulfilled by what we arc doing and pull us away form our i orcs and families we should be Able to make our decision with out the outside pressure to conform to what the world thinks today a woman should be doing in or. Clapper s letter he mentioned some excellent books by or. Raymond Moore that arc not available at the stars and stripes bookstores. They ran be ordered by writing to Hewitt research foundation , box9, Washougal Wash. 98671. A Burse Ambrose Ramsten a West Germany a Khz publish my your pm pal c. Jawand Villar Carva Filas Dit tar Jumo dal Nona. Louie no 909 slur it Dimer ill Marabon two Man in Pup Penl Plata up attn my Narno in your pan. B65malanast. Amparo bund. 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