European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - January 15, 1990, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Placement advisers say single men Over 29 a harder time finding work than married men / that age fat left Vikel Ana Keith Brand who i selected in a 1989 Competition As the Ideal Sotcan couple. Postponing the vows nut of of unman Tad Man 20 to 29 Yurt old mar Yang 150 Tor  1,000. 1w8 125 not positions which olten involve an after hours social role in which couples Lare better giver Al search firm executives said. Ii is not uncommon Lor the search committees of companies universities and associations to ask Lor an interview or dinner with a Job candidate s spouse in the Job requires extensive lobbying fund raising or Public relations work a d Ronald e. Gerevas the president of Heidrick & struggles. Men who Are specialists in corporate finance begin to feel some pressure to marry at 30, according to another commercial Bank executive because you be got to Hobnob with the Public and clients " the pressure to marry by 30 tends to be lighter in service industries which include things like banking insurance and other non manufacturing businesses and olten comprise smaller and younger companies and in new York which is More tolerant of different styles of living said several personnel managers and career Counselor but a 1989 study by Korn ferry of senior executives at Large corporations Lound that 93 5 percent of the men were married by comparison Only 84.1 percent of american men Between the Ages of 45 and 64 were married in 1987 the reactions of adults whose parents remarry late in Hie Are a blend of wariness and enthusiasm. Adults whose parents remarry by Lawrence Kutner new York times de Eselgroth vividly remembers receiving a Call a few years ago from a Man who announced that he wanted to marry Etc Groth s widowed 70-year-old Mother the Man. An old nand of the family who was a widower was unsure of the response he would hear. I yelped with Joy and  said Eccl Groth. A free Tenco writer and film maker who lives in a us Urb of St. Paul Minn. My mom was obviously lonely. John was in the same situation it seemed like absolutely the right  he admitted that much of his enthusiasm for his Mother s remarriage stemmed from his own Long term relationship with the Man. Ii she had wanted to marry someone i had t known before i would have recorded that person As guilty until proven innocent he said. Eselgroth is by no Means alone in his combination of wariness and enthusiasm Lor a Parent s second marriage. Although there Are no injures on the number of adults whose divorced or widowed parents remarry government statistics show that a growing number of adults Over the age of 45 Are entering into second or third marriages. Many of these newlyweds have adult children. Adults whose parents remarry olten lace situations quite different from those confronting Young children what will their adult to adult relationship be like with this person7 what obligations will they have if this new stepparent becomes seriously ill How will this affect their inheritance or the distribution of family heirlooms is this person taking advantage of the Parent emotionally physically or i manically parents Are More Likely to solicit the opinions of their adult children said or m Duncan Stanlon a psychologist and the director of the family division of the department of psychiatry at the University of Rochester. In Somo families that May mean literally asking the adult children for permission to marry in others the subject is broached obliquely. Parents Are More distressed by an adult child who says that he or she disapproves said or Norman Epstein an associate professor of family and Community development Al the University of Maryland at College Park. They can t discount it As easily Asil in had come from a younger child the Parent is much More Likely to Start second guessing  Many adult children find themselves being More conservative in their judgments of their parents than they would be of themselves. One woman i interviewed said it came As a Complete Shock when her widowed father remarried a younger woman from a very different background said or. Alan Entin. A family psychologist in Richmond who is president elect of the division of family psychology of the american psychological association. The woman believed her father was t playing by the rules Entin said. She said she would have bran More comfortable if the new Wile had been Nore like her  or. Emily b. Visher a psychologist in Lafayette. Caf who has conducted several major studies of step families. Found that a Parent s remarriage can Caus. A it in to reassess their own marriages. It can also Lead them to take a new look at the family in which they grew up. Visher said that several of the adult children we studied whose widowed lathers remarried told us i see my father giving things to his new wife that he did t give to my Mother. It makes to Leel sad " comparisons Between old and new spouses come about in other ways As Well. Dick Mcevoy. A marketing consultant in Westport. Con whose widowed Mother remarried three years ago. Said Hal he and his eight Brothers and Sisters have very different relationships with their Stepfather than they had with their lather Allol the children were enthusiastic about the second marriage and welcomed the Man into their family we re not at the Point where we re calling David dad " he said but we definitely see him As our mom s  115,1990 stars and stripes Pago 15