European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - March 20, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Friday March 20, 1992 the stars and stripes a Page 19 Ann Landers dear Ann Landers i am desperate for advice and Hope you can help. My husband no longer finds me sexually attractive. For the past several years he has made love to me Only when i have asked. I admit that in a not As Beautiful As i once was but in a not repulsive either. I have scars from a surgery that i try to conceal with pretty nightgowns and soft lights but he said the scars done to bother him. In be tried discussing the problem but he insists there a nothing wrong. He says that he still loves me and that he finds me attractive. In be begged remained silent and cried. He told me a while Back that a woman should not be aggressive so i decided to wait for him to make the first move. In a still waiting. Next month it will be two years since we made love. I went to a therapist who said my husband May be suffering from depression or some physical problem. I asked my husband to go for a physical but he refused. When he saw the Bill from the therapist he became angry with me for discussing our personal life with a a stranger and he refused to speak to me for three Days. When i look in the Mirror i see a 48-year-old woman who probably will never again have intimate Contact today a crossword dear Abby dear Abby i like your column and 95 percent of the time you Are right. This time i think you Are wrong. My wife and i were married at 18 and 19 years of age respectively. We have a great son Ana daughter As Well As six wonderful grandchildren. Our grandchildren even bring their boyfriends and girlfriends to visit us on our farm and to ask our opinions on Many subjects. Your answer with regard to a letter from a Reader who does not like his wife opening his mail without his permission is in bad taste and incorrect. Our wonderful marriage has lasted 50 years because it includes no secrets both participants working for the same goal always talking nicely no drinking no smoking no cussing and we kiss each other at least 50 times a Day we have no Money problems and have no need for privacy Between one another. I think your views about a spouses being entitled to his or her privacy Are incorrect. Paul Pence or. Dear Paul my congratulations to you for marriage License docs not Confer to read mail addressed to ones someone who had that problem Nate As you dear Abby this advice is for a straight opened All the mail that came to an Ideal marriage. A automatic permission spouse. Read on for but was not As Fortu Arrow a whose wife the House regardless with a Man. That makes me overwhelmingly sad. In be tried to count my blessings because he is otherwise a Good husband and i do love him. Am i being selfish to want More do you think i will be Able to adjust to abstinence in time what should i do Zero self esteem in Chicago dear Chicago first recognize the fact that it is your husband who has the problem not you. Forgive me but the Man sounds selfish and inconsiderate and he May be depressed in the bargain. Obviously you want to stay married to him so i am going to make a suggestion that is going to bring a ton of criticism but i done to care. In a Here to help people and you need help. A woman of 48 is too Young to forget about sex. So if your husband ref times to satisfy you then satisfy yourself. Because aids has appeared on the scene i am recommending this alternative which can be a lot better than nothing. I done to want to hear from clergy telling me its a sin. Self gratification is How almost everyone discovers his or her sexual self. There should be nothing Sintil about it. C creators Syndicate letters to Ann Landers May be addressed in care of the stars and stripes Apo a 09211, and they will be forwarded to her. Of whom it was addressed to. I had the same problem. I worked Days. My husband worked nights. He opened All the mail. My resentment kept growing and consequently i accumulated a lot of anger. Then one Day i got some Good advice from a coworker. She said a rent a . Box and have All your mail sent  so i told my husband i had had enough of my privacy being violated and that i was getting a Post office Box. I filled out change of address cards for my friends creditors and relatives and i keep the key to my . Box in a drawer at my office. Now i go to Check for my mail during the lunch hour. I never had anything to hide either. But having my personal mail opened by mistake or otherwise really irritated me. Now. There is never a problem. Angry no More Gulfport miss. Dear Abby i travel for business reasons and frequently Dine in restaurants. I have noticed that on several occasions the server will take my Money to pay the Bill then ask me if i a want any change a obviously intending to keep All the change As a tip unless i object. Is it considered acceptable for the server to ask if the diner wants change ., Ottawa Ontario dear  No. The server should return All the change. Then the customer gives whatever amount he wishes As a tip. C Universal press Syndicate letters to Ann Landers May be addressed in care of the stars and stripes. Apo a 09211, and they will to forwarded to her. Across 1 cougars 6 Bravo 9 lingerie Purchase 12 Bikini . 13 transplant recipient 14 pouter s protrusion 15 pupa to to 10 titbits 10 material wealth 20 total receipts 21 san Diego attraction 23 raring to go 24 a for a Sake 25 hostels 27 jittery 29 Little Brothers do it 31 . 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