European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - May 18, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse Page 20 Arm Lander the stars and stripes dear Ann Landers after Reading so Many opinions for and against abortion i fee that As a woman who has undergone an abortion i need to speak up for the rights of All women who Are concerned with this ongoing Battle. Several years ago i gave birth to a baby who was diagnosed with an almost certain fatal disease. We took him to several medical centers and the prognosis was the same a your baby is not going to live. They proved to be right. During that stressful time my husband and i became careless and i got pregnant again. The doctors had a Field Day running tests on me to determine whether or not the fetus also was affected. I decided if the fetus was healthy i would have the child. The doctors said they Tell until the 13th or 14th week All the while advising me not to Rule out abortion. We decided to hold out in Case the fetus was healthy. At is weeks the doctors saw bad signs but wanted me to wait until 18 weeks. Abortion is considered Safe up to 20 weeks. At 18 weeks they had clinical proof that the fetus was affected by the same disease my first baby had died from and they told me that this child would most certainly die too. We decided on abortion. I Felt out of place in the clinic being the Only woman there with her husband. It was physically and mentally dear Abby dear Abby. Your help is needed. There arc no friends or family members to whom i can turn. A cancerous Lump was found in my breast. In be had medical opinions read everything i can find on the subject and have All the facts a and i do not want that breast removed. To know that i May Wake up and find that i am Only part of a woman scares me to death. I have no support from my husband he was More concerned when my Wisdom Teeth were removed. 1 thought maybe someone from the american cancer society could help but i was told to hurry up and have it done and worry about the rest later. How do other women handle that kind of problem no one knows about this except my husband. I feel that there is no need to worry my family. I really done to want All the unwanted advice id get from them. I have been a loner All my life and this is the Only Way i can handle it. Death is better than surgery. In a damned if i do and i m damned if i done to. Sign me. A death Row woman dear death Row woman death is not better than surgery the american cancer society can help you. Many women live through this kind of ordeal and emerge with flying colors and you can too. You May be a candidate for More limited surgery than the a a old Radical Mastectomy. Call your local american cancer society for a referral to a breast cancer specialist. In the meantime share your feelings monday May 18, 1992 painful even though they gave me plenty of drugs to Calm me Down. I decided then and there How important it is for women to have choices. No one should have the ability to take away our Freedom and control Over our bodies just because we were born female. I done to Sec anyone mandating vasectomies for men who say they Are sterile and then get a woman pregnant. Nor do 1 see a Law ordering castration for convicted rapists. This is America a the land built on Freedom. Lets be Ever mindful of How precious is the Freedom to choose. I hate to think what my life would be like had abortion not been a Legal option and i had no Money. Sign me childless but not Choi Celess in Michigan dear childless your letter is a perfect example of Why this Issue should not be a political one and Why it should be left to the woman and her doctor to decide. To put it bluntly the government docs not belong in this picture. If a woman needing an abortion is poor she is not Able to obtain any government assistance whatever unless she lives in one of these 12 states a new York California Connecticut Hawaii Massachusetts new Jersey North Carolina Oregon Vermont Washington West Virginia and Alaska. In a ashamed that my own wonderful state Illinois is not on the list. In eight other states she can get help Only if she was raped or her life is in danger. It appears that the women in this country have their work Cut out for them. C creators Syndicate inc. With your physician. And please write again and include your name address and Telephone number. Dear Abby my husband of 25 years walked out and left me with two teen agers to raise. He said he was in love with a woman he works with. One thing that helped me during this time was one of your columns. The response about the Man who has a lady for a wife and will pick up some tramp described my situation perfectly. Please reprint that Story to help some other woman whose marriage has ended because of adultery. Thanks for your help. A lady dear lady if the item has helped you regain your perspective after your trauma i am gratified. Here it is dear Abby Why will a married Man pick up a tramp and treat her like a lady then turn around and treat his wife who is a lady like a tramp Minnie dear Minnie a Man picks up a tramp because he wants a female companion who is no better than he is. In her company he does no to feel inferior. He rewards her by treating her like a lady. He treats his wife who is a lady like a tramp because he feels that by degrading her he will bring her Down to his level. This makes him Feci guilty so to get even with his wife for making him Feci guilty he keeps right on punishing her. 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