European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - September 05, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Page �0 the stars and stripes i september 5,1994 was in dear Ann Landers i have been thinking for weeks about the starry eyed letter you received from a romantic in  she complained that her married life was Dull and she wanted to have an affair with someone who would bring her Flowers give her compliments and make her feel feminine that letter has been keeping me up nights. I now know that i will not rest until i Tell you my  had an affair after 15 years of a very Good marriage. Like romantic i wanted a Man who would give me compliments and make me feel wonderful. The Man i selected was our Clergyman. After six months of sneaking around the affair ended in disaster. We had planned a Rendez Vous at my Home in the afternoon when the children were in school and my husband was going out of town. His flight was cancelled at the last minute and he came Home and caught us making love in the living room. The details Are too painful to go into and the results were a Nightmare. The Clergyman was forced to leave town and my husband started divorce proceedings. I had to get Down on my hands and Knees and beg him to forgive  a " he finally did but he barely looked at me for three Ann Landers months. I am in counselling now trying to recover from All this and am working hard to rebuild my husband s Faith in me. Was the affair Worth it hell no. It was the dumbest thing i be Ever done in my life and i d give anything if it had never  fool somewhere in Canada Dea Canada thank you for a letter that must have taken a lot out of you to write. Keep Reading for another one dear Ann Landers i too am married to a Guy who describes himself As  meanwhile i am an incurable romantic and full of Energy and i would love to live life to the Hilt. Yet we have been married for 14 Happy years. This lacklustre Guy is solid sane and Down to Earth. When i come up with harebrained ideas he tactfully steers me onto a More reasonable Road. Although he does t Send me Flowers and love notes and there Are to dinners by candlelight these things Pale when judged against the total person. This wonderful Guy got up at 5 . Last week and put hew tires on my Bike. He does the dishes Ever night so i can rest up from my Day even though his might have been tougher. And he is a fabulous father to our three children. Romantic in Florida can have her sizzling affair. I la take lacklustre any Day. Chino Valley Ariz. Letters to Ann Landers should be addressed to her at . Box 11562, Chi Cago Iii. 60611-0562.  greater Syndicate. Shame of Mother of the Bride dear Abby i had to write when i read the letter from Mother of the Bride who was thrilled when the priest re fused to officiate at the daughter s wedding because she and her Fiance had been living together. Mother called it living in  Abby sometimes living together can help couples avoid divorce which occurs in approximately 30 percent of marriages today. Mother sounds very judgmental and vindictive. I wonder in which Church she Learned this. -loril.bett, new Orleans dear Lori other readers share your View. Read on dear Abby in response to Mother of the Bride who was thrilled when her Church refused to marry her daughter who had been living in sin with her Fiance while shopping for a Church in Ventura calif., we told the pastor of the methodist Church that we had been living together he replied some pastors refuse to marry couples who have been living together but in my opinion they Are the couples who need to be mar ried v. V.  needless to say we chose the methodist Church. --4 happily wed in Ventura dear happily Ved that pastor has my vote. And by the Way i wonder who married Adam and eve dear Abby in response to Mother of the Bride who was thrilled when the Catholic Church refused to marry her daughter and her live in Lover because they had been living together i am a member of the unitarian universalist Church which is filled with decent Loving couples who  be married in a More traditional Church because of various restrictions. " we unitarians accept the goodness of people s intentions yes even those who do not attend Church faithfully but seek us out when they Are in need of a priest to baptize a baby give a Sermon for a funeral or have a big Church wedding. If the daughter would like a Church that will accept her and her franc just As. They Are the unitarian uni Vera list Church May be the Church she is looking for. J Linda in Wilmington Del. Letters for this column should be addressed to dear Abby at . 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