European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - November 17, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse Thursday november 17, 1994 daughter Ann Landers dear Ann Landers my problem is my biological father he divorced my mom when i was very Young but kept in con tact about two or three times a year As i was growing up. When i decided in my lat teens to allow my Lovine step father to adopt me legally Harry was very resentful and Cut off All Contact. At first i was Hurt but after a while i Felt of about not having him in my life. Four years later Harry called out of the Blue and sent me a Cou ple of Friendly notes. Another year passed and he called again and sent a gift for my Colleg graduation. Over the next three years Harry contacted me once or twice but now i really wish that he would just leave me alone. Life seemed so much simpler without his jumping in every once in a while. When my daughter was born it got a lot More complicated. Harry telephoned and sent gifts for her birth Day and at Christmas. I did t want to be rude so wrote some lukewarm thank you notes. What really an noyed me is that he signed the cards i feel guilty saying i Don t want anything to do with him since he is my father but i just Don t want the Man around. I get very upset and stressed whenever i hear from , i m sure that it bugs my Mother and Stepdad. What should i do am i morally obligated to lethargy into my life even though it causes so much chaos or have the right to Tell him to leave Means my family alone i need to know what to do before i get another help me. I m feeling suffocated by dad s intrusion . It is obvious that your father is trying hard to make amends for the Way he treated you in the earlier years. Please consider the fact that peace is better than War and love is a lot More healthful than hate. If with the help of counselling you could get to that place it would be Well Worth the time and Money. The decision must be yours however. Should you feel that letting Harry Back into your life would be viewed As a betrayal by your mom and her husband it May be Best not to risk it dear Ann Landers i have been going with Kenneth for almost a year. We have been living together for three months. He has asked me to marry him and we Are going to Colorado to meet his Mother i am 32 and had a previous marriage that lasted Only one year. Kenneth is exactly my age and has never been married. He wants me to Tell his Mother that i am 28. Heals would prefer that i not mention my previous marriage or that i was born a Catholic. He is a Baptist these suggestions have Given me new insight re Garding my Fiancee character. I am deeply disappointed but i Don t want to lose him. Yet cannot see myself telling these lies. Kenneth says he sees his Mother Only twice a year and the misinformation won t make any difference. Please give me your thoughts. Greta dear Greta v. Are you sure you want to marry this Man my recommendation is that you cancel the trip and Tell Kenneth to find himself a Nice 28-year-old Baptist woman who has never been married. Letters to Ann Landers should be addressed to her at . Box 11562, Chi Cago Iii. 60611-0562. C creators Syndicate. Looking for a Man ? altar your ways dear Abby last month one of your columns included a letter from manless in Alabama asking where women could go to meet decent men. Your reply included 10 Likely places to meet single men. While you offered some very Good suggestions you failed to mention the Best most reliable place in a House of worship. In most churches today great Deal of interest and Effort is directed toward singles that group Long neglected and expected to fit in wherever the could. Here in Charleston s.c.,Many churches temples and synagogues have singles departments for sunday school Bible study fellowships retreats and a Host of other opportunities to socialize. Dear Abby so Abby please Tell manless in Alabama to caller local churches and inquire about single ministries. A single the Charleston Are a dear single female an excellent suggestion. As the Good Book says ask and it shall be Given you seek and be shall find. Matthew 7 7 dear Abby when i read the letter from the 93-year-old hostess whose guests stayed and stayed and talked and talked while another guest played the piano and Sang endlessly i was reminded of the Story they Tell about my wonderful great Grandfather one evening when he and my great grandmother had dinner guests who would not leave he finally stood up and said come on Gladys let s go to bed so these Nice folks can go Diana Hutchinson Portland Ore. Utters for this column should be addressed to dear Abby at . Box 447. Mount Morris Iii. 61054. 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