European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - December 02, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse Friday december 2, 1994 _. "-., " i parents should dear Ann Landers growing up i always Felt like a Dummy. I dropped out of High school and went Back a few years later to get my ged. I then married and raised six Fine sons. Although i rated High the in tests i top for employment i still Felt stupid and had no Confidence in myself. /. My sister Stella graduated from High school and put herself through some years of College. For several years she worked As a government court reporter in Washington d.c., and was promoted to work in Germany and Japan. I always admired her for making such an interesting life for herself. Stella ended up in san Diego in a very Good Job and then retired. Recently Stella told me something that i must have stored away in my subconscious. She said our Mother used to Tell everybody that i was the pretty daughter and Stella was the smart one. Stella said she always Felt unattractive although she was actually very pretty. Everyone thought she looked like the actress Gene Tierney. Please Tell parents to be careful How they refer to their children. The children will believe them and will live up or Down to their parents opinion of them. U Kent Wash. Dear Kent your letter could be the most important thing Mil Lions of parents will read in the next several months. What a lesson there is in those words you have written. Children who Are praised and made to think Well of themselves will have a far better Chance to succeed in life. Those who Are belittled and told they Are stupid or the stars and stripes Page 25 Ann Landers no darned Good will eventually believe it and Stop trying to be anything else. R thank you for your words of Wisdom. Dear Ann Landers i am in the Middle of a family feud and need to know what to do. If i am wrong i Hope you will Tell me. I have two Small children who Are terrified of dogs and cats. Most of my friends and family members know this and put their pets outside or in another room when we come to visit. My sister in Law Hortense however refuses to do this. She says i Don t lock up my dog for she has a Large spirited Golden retriever that she says is a member of my meanwhile my kids Are scared to death of that dog. Hortense moved into a new Horrie two years ago and i have yet to go Over there. It s Only a few Miles from Pur place but i refuse to drag two terrified children into that House. What s the right thing to do Ann i hate being at Odds i Tiv my sister a Taw and i Don t want my Chil Dren or hers to suffer by not being allowed to play to Gether As cousins should. Hortense flatly refuses to come to my House because i will not go to hers. Any suggestions on How to make peace outcast in . Dear outcast i see a serious problem Here in addition to the family feud. It s your children s fear of dogs. They Are going to have a Devil of a time in later life unless you do some thing about this now. Get in touch with your paediatrician and a veterinarian and ask for guidance. You need to be educated on Htow to help your children overcome this fear. If they suggest that you get a Puppy for your youngsters i Hope you will follow through and take your children to visit their cousins As soon As possible. Letters to Ann Landers should be addressed to her at Box 11562, Chi Cago Iii 60611-0562. _ c creators sind late deceased spouse haunts Romance dear Abby i lost my husband several years ago and met this very Nice Man after being alone for Many years. We started dating and he was the first Man to Tell me he loved me. Abby it was wonder Ful to hear those words again. He is a perfect gentleman brings me Flowers and always walks me to my door. I kept expecting him to pose marriage but he has never mentioned marriage nor did he introduce me to any members of his family. I thought it was rather Odd. Then he told me that he had promised his wife before she passed away that he would never marry again dear Abby Abby he asked me not to go with any other Man. Quibble i told him i would not and i have kept my prom ise. I love him but i do not like this hiding. I told him he needs to talk to a head doctor about his Promise and How it is affecting his life. He refused. _ i would appreciate any advice you can give me. Please Don t use my name or town _ i Don t want to get him in trouble. In hiding dear in hiding the Man you love is being very unfair to you. Furthermore he appears to be untrustworthy. Unless he introduces you to his family and friends i see to future for you in this relationship. Letters Tor this column should to addressed to dear Abby at . Box 447, mount Morris jul. 61054. q Universal press Syndicate today s crossword across 1 one of Louisa 4, Moon struck. 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