European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - May 25, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse                                May 1985 the stars and stripes Page 11 Ann Landers 9 dear Ann Landers in the last several weeks you have published several letters about the neglect of the elderly by their in sure you have stirred up a great Deal of guilt and some of it is in make allowances for those now who had horrible parents who would be arrested for child neglect abuse if they behaved now As they behaved or so years parents who spent much of their Chil Drens youth As irresponsible Pawn ing the kids off on neighbors and parents who had Little to do with their now Middle aged children until the realization of old age gripped them with panic and forced them to establish a rela grown children who have survived the horrors of an unhappy childhood and have become responsible adults May choose to provide for their parents in a Way that was never done for they give them the Security of a food and clothing in a Home removed from these grown children carry an unpleasant Burden fraught with Many Adverse psychological age is not always deserving of neglect is not always i wish to be both name and place dear Anonymous your letter sounds As if you Are accusing me of being critical of children who put their elderly parents in nursing you Are i have never taken that old folks who Are incontinent or chronically in need of round the clock Are better off in a nursing grown children who for whatever Rea son take care of their parents in a Home other than their own need not apologize or feel ill bet you were an abused child who cannot put the past out of your this is to be Able to forgive is the greatest it is also one of the clinging to old hurts is not Only it is i agree that age is not always deserving of respect but give it it is the highest order of this is what it Means to be a real dear Ann Landers in in love with a wonderful Man who has asked me to marry in 22 and Hes 28 and when we met he told me that he and his mar had tried to get Back together but it didst work Margie called on me recently so i could see How pregnant she Shes due any it seems she conceived during their attempted she told me in no Uncertain terms she wants her husband when i confronted him he said he has known about her condition for a Long time but didst Tell me because he was afraid id leave he also said that he intends to take financial responsibility for his but would never go Back to even if i left i think constantly about his unborn child and what his a wife must be going i want to stay with but i am not sure i please advise Nevada Nell dear Nevada give this matter a few weeks of serious if you Are certain there is no Chance that your Friend will reconcile with his go for i wish you reminder a letters to the editor must contain the full printed name and address of the writer and must be we do not read unsigned but we will withhold your name on request and protect your a letters Are subject to Reader describes the life of the army sol Parent Ive read a lot of articles on the army its problems and what the army is doing to resolve those but what about the problems of the sol Parent the widowed or separated serv ice member with dependents the sol Parent has additional problems specifically belonging to when a married service member receives overseas assignment instructions and cant get con current he or she has a spouse to care for their when they have cd charge of quarters or an Alert Rolls the lives of their children Are not life can be especially Here in for both the sol Parent and mar ried army couples who sometimes share Moss and because of it physical training you can find Young children alone two to three times a week in the Early morning hours because the Day care Center Doest open that Early or a baby Sitter can not be found for that hour in the and when cd or an Alert Rolls around and the regular baby Sitter is not available or suddenly unwilling to care for your Chil you sell the cd for to and come up Short at the end of the month just when the diapers run the car stops run somebody needs a pair of shoes or someone wants to go on the class As far As the Alert the kids Are left alone or the service member gets in deep trouble because they have an infant who cannot be left if you have to work past 6 and Arent informed Early enough to make arrangements another counselling statement or at elimination proceed Ings the Day care Center closes at 6 and charges a minute for children not picked up by 6 with a ceiling of speaking of the Day an sole with two kids pays As much As the e5 with a wife or husband who Field duty knocks the sol Parent for a especially when the Section he or she works for Doest let them know there going to the Field until two or three Days before they Are to move its happened to but then Why should the army care after who told them to have kids Why dont they get out they signed a Soldier praises medical system i have been in the army for 14 years now and have heard nothing but snivelling from both the Active duty and dependent Side of the House about our medical i would like to take this Opportunity to de fend although their actions could speak for themselves if we would give them a in March of 1984 i underwent a knee operation at the Nuernberg from my initial appointment with the doctor through the i processing and subsequent out processing from the i received excellent one year i had to return for an operation on my other i had the same the same head nurse and some of the staff was the one would think that Over a period of a they would become Burntout and maybe a Little Apa these folks still provided the same care with a highly professional and caring i wish that i could name them All but that not i com mend the doctor who cared for the folks in the recovery and the head nurse and her i would also include the hos Pital administration staff for their to the people who complain about the care they allow me to make a few suggestions use your medical benefits when you need its hard to feel sorry for a medical personnel Are re member dont let past experiences or Rumor control cause you to fear or disrespect those whose Job it is to care for if you find these suggestions too perhaps youd like to get out and pay for half the care you receive Dan Rosera Germany european out question answered i keep getting the runaround on this question and Haven been Able to find an adequate my situation is that i received an Honor Able european out discharge in August 1984 with the allowance to Send my hold baggage goods to the states within 180 Days and to Fly Back within a year at government is it possible to get an Extension on my hold baggage shipment and return flight to the states i keep getting conflicting i am currently going to school with the univer sity of Maryland and plan to graduate on or around december Durbeck Kaiserslautern editors note Jeffrey traffic management 86th tac fighter replies the joint travel regulations volume paragraphs m8261 and contains entitlements for service members to travel and ship personal property to their Home of record or last place of enlistment upon separation from Active pen pals i am interested in having friends from All walks of i am 23 years of age and enjoy household Reading letter meeting people and re Allna Mallma 67712 banker Han Riverside Davao Philippines i am a 20yearold male and am in i like singing and Ball Mallol so quillor Philippines if members have served less than eight years continuous military their entitlements must be used within 180 Days of the Date of if the members have served More than eight years continuous they must use All their entitlements within one air Force Reg paragraph says that requests for extensions Over 15 working Days can be forwarded to he requests must be initiated before the entitlement expires and coordinated through the base transportation Only cases involving extreme emergencies Long term hospitalization will be approved beyond 15 working Days by correcting oversight i am writing in regards to an article which appeared in your paper it 43 members of an air Force Squadron at Camp Darby in i would like to rewrite the first sentence of the second paragraph for they Are the men and women of Harvest in sure that the Lack of the and women in your column was merely an and you had no intentions of leaving out the 10 females eight Active duty and two civilians assigned to har Vest aside from this oversight it was really Nice to see Harvest Eagle in and we appreciate your thank Carolyn delo Camp Italy sol Parent plan the army int responsible if their Mother Dies and leaves them with no one to leave the children with when they come Down on overseas assignment or a when War Breaks we dont care if the first sergeant changed the duty roster at the last minute and the baby Sitter cant keep the kid that what do you mean you dont want to leave the kid with just any one Are y6ur kids army Issue no then their mental and emotional health is i know of a Soldier who has to leave Nur Servage children alone twice a week in the Early hours of the morning because she cant find someone willing to keep them that neither can she afford she Doest drive so it would have to be convenient or shed miss this person is an outstanding Soldier with eight years serv ice to her credit and is proficient in her military occupational speciality but Shes getting out this year because she cant take it we  forget the male sol Parent because he has his own unique problems he Doest have Motherly he has to learn i feel the sol Parent should be allowed a liven relative or servant who has All privileges necessary to assist and deter the aforementioned the housing Regula Tion says you can have a servant but he or she cant buy groceries or pampers at the and when the person is an imme Diate family member but not eligible for dependent status he or she cannot find employment when their services caring for that Are Only needed to take the fright out of 24hour guard and Field what about the sole Parent what about us 5 Dolores Byrd Germany the european edition Usa editor in chief Proctor Deputy editor in chief managing editor Blackwell Mcdermott production manager circulation manager this newspaper is an authorized unofficial publication for members of the military services contents of the stars and stripes Are not necessarily the official views or endorsed the the department of defense or the european the appearance of advertising in this including inserts or does not constitute endorsement by the department of or the stars and stripes of the products or services everything advertised in this publication shall be made available for or patronage without regard to National marital physical political affiliation or any other non Merit Factor of the or military address the stars and Apo International mail the stars and Postrach 11 d6100 Darmstadt Tel Gale Shell 06155 6010 Darmstadt Airstrip 2376 the euro 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