European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - July 29, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Page 18 the stars and stripes july 1985 columns baseball just Howard by Russell Baker its been a Long time since anybody has called baseball the National people under 30 May doubt that anybody Ever did yet such is the All summer Long radio voices and sportswriters vibrated about the National As summer the National pastime culminated in the fall that was the world its been a Long time since anybody called the world series the fall except for the occasional aging sportswriter who Learned his cliches Back in the Days when sportswriters were called the its been a Iong time since anybody called sportswriters the these language changes and Many others that could be cited the disappearance of twin killing to mean double Homeric clout to mean Home speak of the seriousness that has beset alien baseball As red Smith used to just a game that children can it bred a childhood Lan Guage bloated with zest and a circus language used by barn urns disciples to Wink at the crowd As if to we All know this is but int it fun so we had the National the fall the Homeric the twin the Idle question if sportswriters were the Why we rent team owners the behind the Gaudy Lingo was a sophisticated View of life in which dignified language was deemed unfit for mat ters that were basically Bunkum like we have the sports which is not definitely not just games that children can this is High stakes account labor Lead ers often take up More of the sports Page than the play that fun there was a Lovely illustration of the grownup state of affairs a few weeks Back when Howard on abcs monday night asked Dave Winfield of the new York Yankees if there was bad blood Between him and the Yankee owner George Cosell was trying to infuse a bit of Boyish zest into a very Dull to but Winfield was having none of he smiled Toler Antly at the question As one might smile at a child who asked if eating spinach would make him As Strong As and its just Busi with that no fun that business is serious As Calvin Coolidge the business of America is business is for grownups business is for big Bucks business is not for being required a serious language to match its sportswriters no longer the scribes had to concede that calling baseball the National pastime was misleading for years Dull people who read newspapers faces had been writing editors to argue since horseracing attendance far exceeded it would be More accurate to Call horse racing the nation Al More cynical types observed that there were dozens of other activities that might be More properly called the National which had always been the scribes had always known this truth but had risen above it because they knew a higher truth to that the Pursuit of truth has absolutely nothing to do with fun at the even in the time of the everybody knew it was silly to Call the world series the fall but talking silly was part of the pleasure adults took from sports when they were just games that children could the fact about the world series was that it was not a classic but a primetime television special performed at the end of a complicated playoff schedule that was Likely to produce a contest Between mismatched teams on lat fall nights that often feel More wintry than autum As in other divisions of the sports television riches have produced comically bloated salaries so that Journeyman performers receive hundreds of thousands of dollars for eight months of mediocre to most people at the average Ball is the wealth of the they can no More grasp Why players get Ting such Gravy ought to be on strike than they can understand Why the owners Are angry because the play ers wont make them Stop paying such outrageous Sala this is business As incomprehensible to most As the corporate rating game businessmen play in Wall business theres an authentic National c new York times telling it As it is about such As by James Kilpatrick last month Newsweek Magazine carried a piece about changing systems of health Many said the arc now in cities like san Francis co and for roughly a third of the population is now enrolled in a arg if the class will now we will hear the semiannual lecture on the misuse of like when such As is go Back to the offending what does it Tell us about mos health maintenance organizations in san Francisco and Minneapolis it tells us that in cities like san Francisco and Minneapolis san Diego and perhaps roughly a third of the population is now and this is not at All what the writer the misused like and the misplaced which is the subject of lectures in Spring and Are among the most common errors in everyday i am fully aware that both Bernstein and two ordinarily infallible sniffed at the whole business of like and such they scorned my position As but they were quite simply of course there Are times when like is proper lives like lincolns inspire us but when our purpose is to Illus trate by Way of specific we want cities such As Minneapolis and san As a matter of in the sentence under Examina what we wanted was in san Francisco and Minne for in Northern a monthly Magazine called in flight reminded its readers that material in this and every Issue is across the in Roa a cartoonist named Jack Young inserted a classified and in the he wanted everyone to know that his and Johnny the Are let us now write 10 times upon the peeves and Crotchet Jean Mccracken of winces when Forte is pronounced for Doris also of is annoyed by either Side when each Side is Baresh of Seattle objects to starting sentences with and or Keith Leeds of Indianapolis is fed up with wait person and the Sid Morris of Miami nominates As an especially stupid phrase to have Homer Brown of takes the weeks prize for lining up 14 Crotchet All in a among window of grass Domino safety leg cutting Bottom and bite the he writes that Hes 76 and has been compiling a notebook of nuisances for he Are just the tip of the right on c Universal 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