European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - December 31, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Arm Landers tuesday. December 31, 1985 the stars and stripes Page 11 dear Ann Landers the enclosed list of do s and Don k for visiting the sick by Elinor Klein appeared in Parade Magazine. My Hus band was ill for a Long time. Had i seen this list i would have sent copies to friends and relatives. I Don t wish to a j Pear ungrateful but people need to be educated on this subject. Although you dealt with it several months ago. I Hope you consider the enclosed i xxx enough to print. South suburb r1ladi rear . I an and 1 shall. Thanks fur san Rolinc Iton. How to by a Ooi sickroom visitor 1. Call to patient first. Your interest and concern Are Ghitl count not always your presence. A ctr p not to appear distressed. The last thing a patient should do is spend time comforting you. 5. Arritt with topics for conversation. The patient should not feel the pressure of Baring to entertain you. 6. Don t regale patients with horror stories about others who had " he same  always remember no patient Ever fell better hearing hat another patient was in worse shape. 7. If you re Good Friend and the conversation flows easily stay a maximum of two hours. If you re an acquaintance or a Distant relative leave in less than one hour. I would like to add one More suggestion o his excellent list. Do touch the patient. Greet him or her with a warm hand shake a pal or kiss on be Cheek some sign that you Are not afraid of catching what he or she has especially if it is cancer. Cancer is not contagious. Too often visitors have an irrational fear of this disease and it is sensed by the patient. It can be depressing. When you say goodbye do so in a cheerful manner even if you suspect it might be the final Farewell. Don t linger. Say ill see you again then leave. Is. An excellent Book hat will Delight and brighten any sickroom is Simon says the Best of Roger Simon published by contemporary. It Sells for $14.95 and will provide Many hours of pleasure. Dear Ann Landers i read in your column that a woman wishes her husband were alive so he could leave the toilet Seal up. Years ago another woman wrote the same thing about her husband who snored. That letter made me change my tune. I now i halt god every time i pick up my husband s dirty socks or scrape toothpaste off the Bath room Mirror. Thanks for helping people appreciate what they have before it s too late. A. In Vancouver dear Vancouver you re Welcome but i m sure a lot of younger women Don t set it that Way add some older ones As Well stairwell neighbors asked to remember Golden Rule this is an open letter to All stairwell dwellers especially those living in leased off Post quarters in Small communities. When we received orders to return to Germany i was not exactly thrilled to leave my career once again in the Stales. But to be with my husband we packed up and decided to make the Best of our new Home. When our name came up on the housing list we received off Post quarters. As we have two children who love to participate in sports and scouts this caused us some in convenience but we solved the logistical problem by buying a second car. A i problem solved i set out to explore my new surroundings do Volunteer work and by cum Active with other Post activities. This All sounds like a Lovely scenario right wrong since we moved into our quarters in july we have been accused of stealing clothes Iron the laundry room defacing the build ing child neglect and abandonment and generally causing much trouble. My Chil Dren arc too loud destructive verbally Abu Sive and generally terrible people. As of yet no one has attacked our dog or our marriage i m sure though that s Only a matter of time. Of. And yes we do smoke drink and play cards but we also teach sunday school arc scout leaders and do Volunteer work in the Community. We came to Germany expecting some hardships but we arc optimistic people and we looked Forward o exploring Germany again. To the people in our building 1 would like to say thank you for making life very difficult to enjoy. Thank you for not giving us a Chance 1 Wake up each Day with dread instead of looking Forward to a new Day. I want you to know that you have succeeded in ruining this Lour for us. I Hope you Are Happy. To anyone living in stairwells anywhere please Welcome your new neighbors. Show Ihm around Tell them about the neighbor Hood and Post. I m not asking for the red Carpel treatment but we re All in this to Ectner. Ind we must make the Best of what s Here. Remember that you were the new folks once so treat your new neighbors As you would want to be treated. Name and location withheld editor s note we  milled the location of the writer because vie feel this is a situation that could happen any where. A spokesman for the Community replies the problem of housing everyone a tar Moniou sly in a Community is no Cas task. It is unfortunate Hon problems such As this occur. Our concern with Eier jute s Quality of life in this Cornu Tel is a v a Foremost. Tylik particular problem As stated in your second letter Vas Neicer addressed to the Community office. We can ii Navy help when residents Are a in problems with their building Chain of command. A building coordinator or stairwell i coordinator who k not responsive to the needs and welfare of his people can be dealt it ii in Many different a s. The brigade command sergeant major lakes a very personal interest in these matters. Vav e Are now in the process of Irvine to set up a mayoral Gou ring program which we feel will be c in More resp mine to the needs of the people in each building. This system will provide family Mem Bers with an informal Chain of command Structure and a More democratic method of pro Lam sol ing. We know dependents sometimes feel helpless within the Chain of command Structure and do not fully understand the military system. The Community office acts As a Liaison Between the military and family activities on Post. We always Check into any complaint brought to us r explain the reason behind certain events or actions. Some acts of human nature however As mentioned above still baffle us. There Are alternate drown proofing under review i would like to address the Issue of drown proofing. I m sure Many a Soldier from the Nuernberg military Community also would like to address it especially the ones that almost drown. I have been a lifeguard for eight years a water safety instructor for five and an aquatic director at various pools and lakes including the Nuernberg military Community Pool for five years. 1 feel 1 am qualified and hive the obligation to make the following criticism drown proofing is an unnecessary requirement As it is now implemented. Without a comprehensive swimming program drown proofing actually helps to facilitate drowning in Many instances. This year i have personally pulled out five soldiers who were made to swim in 56 f water at 6 in the morning. These people were nol non swimmers but had limited swimming ability. Their instructors had Given hem a Choice be in the non swimmer group or the swimmer group neither of which they belonged in. This is the Rule in 90 percent of drown proofing classes. Last year i pulled Oul seven soldiers All from different units. It also makes no sense to me Why non swimmers Are shown How to blow their Blu pants up in Waist deep water. If they cannot keep afloat in deep water to blow their pants up into notation devices Why would they want to float their pants in water icy con stand up in the army desperately needs a comprehensive swimming program for a soldiers. To attempt to teach 50, 100 or 150 soldiers How to swim in inc hour of instruction is preposterous and even More importantly dangerous. The army has soldiers in Many specialities such As helicopter pilots Crews and engineers All of which work in or Over water and have had no usable swimming instruction. I care very much about people learn ing How to swim. I teach adult classes myself. But if the army could help us do the Job. Drown proofing could be incorporated into the program. And Many people would be saved from Neir drown ing.  Branch Whitfield Nuernberg Germany Kim Tor s not a spokesman from the office of the Deputy c Hief of staff personnel Liq i Karkur re plies the army s current drowning preen lion program has four elements. It advises soldiers to swim Only in authored areas to use the buddy system to avoid drinking and swimming and How to use survival floating in accordance with km21-20. The majority of drownings in . Army Europe involve soldiers in unauthorized areas and the use of alcohol. Wer safely training la currently required would not have prevented most of the drowning partly due to its negative value in cold water which results in excessive loss of body heat. As a result a comprehensive review of army guidance in pm 21-20 for water safely raining referred to As drown proofing is being conducted by safely and the american red Cross. Replacement training must provide the Soldier with he knowledge of How to Progress toward commonsense and awareness in Waer safety. The current proposal is for a two phase program. Phase i would larger the causes of drowning and teach Basic water Surv. Phase ii would educate soldiers in a Pool environment with qualified instructors on Basic water safely swimming skill and evaluation and employment of water survival skills. This program is being refined and will be recommended for adoption in the near future. Means of dealing with frustrations or emotionally Abusia acts by neighbors such As counselling formal complaints or Legal action to counter such inconsiderate behaviour. Be Hope that All of our families living in stairwells will consider these Points and really try to treat your neighbors men and old As you would want to be  the Olden Rule goes a lung stay Linurd a Era one s measure of happiness. Body Armor bullets in reference to a recent letter from the Reader Al harm All. As the Reader said Armor piercing bullets have been in use Lor approximately 10 years and in that time  not one american police officer his been shot with thai Type of ammunition while they were wearing body Armor. What has happened due to the publicity surrounding body Armor and this Type of ammunition is that police officers have been sent in the head due directly to the Media coverage of Pulice use of body Armor. As a police officer eight years and a wearer of body Armor four years. 1 feel that the Media i doing a treat disservice to Llic american police officer in its coverage of the cop killer Bullet As it has been so aptly nicknamed. On sch Elf of myself and my brother police officers Here and in the states please Don t continue this trend. As a police officer i spent $3011 of my Money to protect myself. My wife and son think it is Money Well spent lease Don t make in ineffective. Name withheld Kapaun As Germany thes and feel Pes european eth von capt Dale k. Patterson us Edlow in pm cmdr Jeffrey s. Zakem us Prouty editor in chief , Blac Kwau. M. Proctor . 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