European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - June 7, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Saturday. Juno 1986 the stars and stripes p�0 11 i landed dear Ann Landers this b for still reeling inc woman whose husband Beau her. She slays with him because she does t know what else la do. Each year in the a United suites 3 to 4 f million women arc beaten by their Hus bands in husbands. Boyfriends or lovers. Another j million have been beaten in the past and remain in abusive relationships. Women stay with these men for a variety of reasons Lack of funds fear of Retalia Tion feeling that the children need a father Lack of a place to go. Affection for their husbands in their Good moments and the belief thai the Man will change. The battering Cycle itself reinforce the belief in change because balt Rirs often enter a honeymoon phase following the battering and lavish mention and gifts on their abased wives. By Tenn than Tva have been found to he common characteristics. The abusive no often Blamo his wife for the violence and Tauts that if Fie would Stop doing Iki acs that Uger him he would Stop beat ibs her. But Ocren blame Joh Tessner frustrations alcohol and drugs. Counselor report that men who hitter Are usually emotional in de pendent of their wives and fear thai they my Ian. They use violence to keep the upper band or to get the r own Way. Flatterer through counselling inuit claim responsibility far their behaviour and learn to control themselves. Still reefing needs the help of a local Dom tic violence shelter before she is seriously injured or killed. There Are Many shelters around the country that help victim and their Chil Dren. They offer counselling temporary Honing and other services designed to Harp victim adjust to a in ski knt Kef. The phone number of the nearest Domestic violence shelter can be obtained by calling a Hospital or the Portree station. Use Ful Herb Malum about tiie clergy medical personnel and other step part services that come to the Rescue of battered women a available through the National coalition against Domestic violence 2401 Virginia Are., n.w., suite 306, Washington . 20037. There is help for the batterer. Too. In fad this is often the key to a healthier happier too Tolent Relatia hip. A former victim in Nebraska do . My Hurt boat Greal senile to millions today. On Betula of them h 1 you. Dear Ann Linden today. I read in your column a letter tip cd sub moan Injo in Norfolk.  to Vas a Ami air boat cocaine the my Infra Tang put of the letter my the sat Plenc print to � the teens win know it not dance from their Par on. That stuff goo. In oae ear and out the  Wouri you be so kind � to Osbia Why ants Ricc Joo i Mac car and it ants George in Lakeland. Fla. I a of Octa Momoi of win Ihry Tanev to Kim their ten r m 0� in trim. The i Tom a a Mita Ini-wt.1 i tha Tkacy b of ear a Kolera to toe editor must co Rabi at i printed in and Suma Ai la writer a Wist be rigged. We no ool Reno in fe4 a attn. Eat we will  met cd in Ift ant Pkt pin of. Aff Hon i letters she asks others to be patient around children t would like to comment on the letter children s behaviour irks  let s Call this one in defense of children i m Jick of people who expect children so act like Little  a Man wrote a Lillic while ago commenting on Public child abuse. He won my respect. Could have kissed him. Now let s hear it from another poin of View. Because of people like this writer in ulis world parents Ore under  pres sure with their children. The snap Bones that Thieu was playing with in the Laundro mat would have been viewed by these peo ple As a child making a men or in the Way not As a child upon ring to world. The military Hotuj the Active duty Mem Ber responsible for the action of his or her adult spouse and their children. For exam ple while travelling a few Yean ago to a tale Side Hue. We slopped at a base Croutc. While my husband was inside the finance building 1 took my two children out of the car. Where they had been cooped up for four hours and let them run around the manicured Lawn. An officer came on Sirie and warned me that Ray children had better not step on any Flowers. Being a Young Mother i hustled my children Back to the car and endured their frustrated ears. Today of course whether my husband cared or not i d Tell him to drop dead. In the Bank lines today t see mothers who were dropped off on base at 7 . With their children waiting for the Bank to open to Cash their paycheck. They have belts and wooden spoons to do As the writer suggested have enough respect to contain them around other  god forbid a Mother turns to the person behind her and Days my Little one needs to take a walk and run off this Energy. Will you save my place a there d be a riot who s liking cuts up there hey lady end of the line let s add More pressure on the Parent that the children they love will not be liked by strangers As if we should care. Let s get mad when the Little one bolts Down the aisle and runs into your legs Don l forget to mumble. Kids. Why does t she Lake pm to child  baby Sitters arc hard to come by and expensive. Women Are not being taken for granted any More when it comes to providing care for a child. A lot of them Don t even want to it s a horrendous Job my Point is Peop do not understand children and consequently nuke their lives miserable. The Ages mentioned were just about right Ages 3-12. Around age 12-13 we cad expect adult like behaviour but even then they revert sometimes to 2-year-old behaviour. As for the link one who took the French Fries i m assuming this child was 5 or under. I applaud the parents who did not get angry. The child was showing i sense of autonomy Independence. The fact the child was not afraid to help himself proves the parents were doing a wonderful Job of Mak ing that child feel special secure Strong and accepted. The manners the writer wanted Don t develop until age 1 or so. As for spilled drinks Yelling and scream ing of so sorry their bodies might be big but their minds Are still children. They Don t even think the same Way adults do a totally rational explanation is irrational to them they get Overly rambunctious they forget themselves you mentioned it was a grand opening. Disaster turns into Best prom the Best prom  that was the com men 1 received from Man students leaving the Wiesbaden a officer Chib at z 30a.m. But Thote were not the comments 1 received from the students when the prom originally schedule a for the Neil night at the Mainz Hilton was cancelled because of be curly Rea Tinl by the come Navy ctr Sandef. The prom committee at the school was Java slated with the  of the Caneer Lioa approximately two week before the prom. They had worked for Mantti selecting the theme ordering Unk tops gems it etc., All the usual for a High school prom. A Quick Call 0 the Wiesbaden a offi cers club is answered by manager Rich Ard Canahan. After t free minute Convent Tion we had the vote of the club. The same Day eager to offer the students something extra the prom committee contacted col. John Kendall at the Wiesbaden Community Center who put them in touch with the right people at Amis namely mrs. Jones who immediately went to work finding a suf Lable movie for this age group to be shown after the prom. Thinking that a breakfast after the movie would be a Nice extra this sponsor of the Junior class called ski. Callahan with trepidation asking for this service. Immediately nil response was  the Duff of the Wiesbaden a officers club was Trene Adoui including Saady land Quail. Who made All the food arrangements and sol Matthew Craig co manager with a of Calhan. All were absolutely tremendous. What had appeared to be a major disaster turned into one of the Best proms. How Ever this would never have occurred with out tie marvelous cooperation of this military Community. The students it Gen eral . Arnold High school and their sponsor thank you Virginia a Ryan Junior class sponsor general . Arnold High school Wiesbaden . Facilities canadians can use i am presently leaching for Canadian Forchi in Europe. I would like an address where 1 can get information on the Ameri Cas facilities in Europe add All services . � that we As canadians in Europe can oae. As a teacher i am a Captain in the Jaette Mergos Lahr Dennany. Editors note or. De Schulie Iwer Lenl logistic support Proem Coor. Aulos offic of tit adj tint Central lit pts do , re Palm to a a spouse umma it a of b Caaden tinn teacher in a Canadian fore a school in the fug with an thu inject Gide of Captain in the can Adun forces form facilities in the Federal Ftp Abby of Cumby is gowned by the nato Soutos or Force ape tent sofa. Susareu regulation 600-700, Lodi dual log Sec us Ort appendix to lists support Wickli of we assigned in the Federal kit Pic of ctr Bhoj. Than i b hated Kab cafes Europe ind oas.1 i Haefli tvs including rationed slims Purt aah with a Maan Farco Ramon card. It decal it it a care Kai a memorandum of under standing Mote tween the is. And Canadian forces. Moudary Aukett tall ten to pc Tow is. Dollan or a in cafes eur a Art army continuing education saw Garchaw of Petroleum Oil and Lutr Foufa poll alluded o bar the writer it it included. Access to us. Fore a fact lilies prot do these Roods or Seroke is i wooo re Mission of Canadian farce 1 by a i 8iln Canta no additional to to Locum its arc a red. Wed pm Tuuu. At Uain Tato n of. Or Pri tinge fir Ciletta Tor Usarek communities. The writer is Airbed to Contact i of he a to mod for party Lime to children you should have to pectin a commotion. As an adult you should develop a  of humor toward children and their antics. Yes. It would be Nice if we parents All pot care providers for our children so you could Shon in a Saks fifth Avenue environment. We can afford neither. 1 love seeing children Carefree and yes wild oui of hand. Would t it be great to be a child again patience and a sense of humor toward others children release a lol of pressure on the parents. Parenting is hard. So is growing up. Parents and kids can use All i he help they can get. It would help to have a free Nett cry on payday. It would hip if the gym provided a one hour free Nursery. And the Exchange. A lot could be done but these ideas Are impossible. A Little understanding from impatient people and a smile and then would be a great improvement think about it. Penny Decker Camp Amsterdam Velber hods he wants an answer Why b Al that All the so called experts that choose to Giwer the questions people us in these columns can fill the whole Page of the paper and still not answer the ques Tion if they like to write Tell them to write a Book. Answer the qua lion. Staff sgt Tok ird j. Clark Ang Burc cd May thes Urr my k. Putt Unow. A Edna Chw a w Mia fed try. It us Wim infill it Diu rom no m Elm or a . Us a co"vn4 to Mumk mull be to ill Polk Lehon. If Clerf inv arum of Tupton Watt. Dpi my can Tiht tnlot4nwit Tan it Der Lmarr h d4tf,m, or the so Tel 4ad Hulett of Tom Pray urn v it vat my Ruthm.  div fled in Rife a Hartm Lam to rt4f Ubu Bra Lor pure leu us. Or Oil arum will Mil hot a Korac. Motor to then to Nal Lwft Oriel. It. Rmrll4l a if. 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