European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - September 6, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Special needs adoption can succeed by Jill Lawrence associated Pressa vast majority of the families interviewed for a new study say they re glad hey adopted physically handicapped or emotionally doubted children and would do in again. Only 3 percent o the adoptions in the child welfare league of America study of 177 families came to an end. While 73 percent of the parents interviewed said their experience had been Good or excellent. More than three quarters said the adoption had made family members happier asked if hey would do it again 66 percent said yes the study provides some evidence that special needs adoption even of the hardest to place children can work Oul  said Alhime a. Nelson the Auchoi. Social service workers began a push in the tale 1960s to find permanent Homes for older children and those with physical intellectual or emotional problems David Zederman executive director of the league said there Aro 35,000 of these youngsters previously considered unacceptable currently awaiting adoption the study she first of its kind found thai 85 percent of the �57 children studied showed improvements in health schoolwork or the ability to form Good relationships and 86 percent of the parents said their lives had More meaning because of the adoption. Neither one of us would be alive if in weren t for this Lille boy Nelson quotes an elderly couple As saying we were prepared or the worst but it never came another woman said other 5-Yoar-old adopted daughter who had been abused and neglected she s made us realize Haw precious a child is. And How an adult can have a devastating effect on a child it Omade us More conscious of our  another family said their adopted son mho has Down s syndrome had enriched their lives with his humor and giving nature no matter what he s gone through and the pain he s had he goes on and How can to complain about our own minor problems they said. Olar parents said they had become less materialistic More tolerant More flexible More compassionate More responsible and More understanding As a result of adopting a special needs child. For the children the adoptions Otten provided heir first exposure to family lire and Basic skills such As using table utensils but problems arose even in Good adoption situations Nelson reported and the experiences of some parents were overwhelmingly negative. Some said they hated their children according to the stud one woman said she was anguished because the option made her see a Side of myself that so d me to death. Cruelty came trom my frustrations Ana  the worst experience reported by someone who did not terminate the adaption came from a family Nelson Calls the Reades. Who adopted a Large sibling group of older  from the Start the children stole from neighbors and broke into their Homes and were so disruptive that the adoptive parents put a lock on their own bedroom door. Erma Bombeck shortly after Tho legalization Reade was hospitalized for two months with a nervous breakdown. She told an interviewer later that the problems Are getting worse shoplifting running away. When you talk to Hern they shut you out. Idon l knowhow to Deal with  Moal of the dissolved adoptions involved older White males who had siblings and moderate or severe Emolion problems Nelson said. One Parent had this advice to other parents after terminating a special needs adoption it s of if they think they can Cope with a kid that wants to try to kill  another described dissolution As a sense of toss like a death. It s a feeling of Inadequacy and failure or what could i have done it s been a  " one of the Toots social workers have used to increase Sproal needs adoptions is called stretching suggesting to couples seeking healthy caucasian m ans that they consider other options. More than half the adoptions in the Nelson study resulted trom this process lots of times they have their head and hearts set on adapting a baby i say. Keep an open mind you might find something delightful " said Liederman. A lol of the kids have been deprived beat around a lot sometimes psychologically sometimes physically. They need a lot of support. It can be a real Challenge but the payoff can be Worth it.1 Liederman conceded it s risky but so is  your own children. There s a High pfc enlarge of children in biological families where there Are Aff Hinds of  he says. That s a Given in a Parent child relationship the federally funded study. On the Frontier of adoption a study of special needs adoptive  involved families from the Detroit. Chicago and Houston areas. Local social service agencies sent letters to All eligible families about half participated. The Sample included families who were single Parent and two Parent Black and while White Collar and Blue Collar the children had moderate or severe physical intellectual or emotional impairment or were Al least b years old at the time of placement or were placed Wilh two or More siblings. All the adoptions were legalized Between mid-1977 and mid-1980adoptingabab t betwee i a Magazine to help overcome fear of cancer by Larry Doyle As Yeal be surgeon general. Edward c. 1y United press International Hen Denver publisher Merrill g Hastings Wile Priscilla was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1964, he found Little in the Way of publications to help mrs Hastings underwent a Mastectomy and chemotherapy and her husband retired Afler years in such specially publications As of citing and Colorado magazines started a new monthly "1 started searching around Tor a Layman s explanation of what living with cancer was All about Hastings says. Everything i touched was either very technical medical or it was very do gooder Type of publications from the Federal government just sort of generalized upbeat let s All pull together and see l we can overcome the big bad a what i was looking for was Day to Day information on How to continue on Wilh your life when somebody in your family has cancer a says. How Socope with it the first Issue of Cope Magazine subtitled living Wilh cancer was mailed out a few weeks ago More than �00.000 issues were sent to cancer clinics doctors hospitals and support groups and the response has been extraordinary Hastings says i be been in Trade magazines business magazines and i be never seen anything like  he says. In my three decades i be never seen such an explosive response to a new  Hastings says the August Issue and attendant publicity is bringing in 300 o 500 subscription orders a week and drawing letters from such luminaries As Ann Jillian an actress who underwent a double Mastectomy last year the . Surgeo general Edwar c. Koop. Has asked to write a column Lor the october Issue an unfilled need triggered this response Hastings contends. My suspicion from Early on was that perhaps there was a silent network but nobody had plugged them in he says "8ut there Are millions of people whom cancer affects three Oul of four families have to Deal with cancer one out of three people experience it  Cope s editorial philosophy is strictly news oriented with 35 departments such As ethics research Law insurance and tobacco to keep cancer patients and their families up to Date on the latest developments. The Premier Issue has a cover Pramila on Ruth handler the inventor of the Barbie dolt who is now marketing nearly me a prosthetic device Tor Mastectomy patients. There is also a Story on the efforts of Oil tycoon Armand Hammer and film producer Sherry Lansing to create funding for cancer research the Magazine does not and will nol offer medical advice however. Our whole Credo is we re not doctors and can t cure cancer Hastings says we re professional journalists and our Job is to help overcome the fear of cancer by disseminating  the Magazine is supported mainly through advertising from products such As sea and ski Block Oul sunscreen or places such As the Ronald Mcdonald House. Hastings says the Magazine should also attract ads from food companies hospitals and clinics and plans to introduce a medical edition that will include ads from pharmaceutical companies which Are not allowed to advertise to the Public. Cope s Tolfree number for subscriptions and information is 800 343-Cope. The Magazine is not available on any newsstand. Suppose most of you saw the Story about single who would like to be married but who Are looking for love in All the wrong places. There s something to that 8ars Aren t the place. Everyone s Happy in a bar and Why should t they be it s too dark to see runs in the pantyhose Gray roots or Tinea in lha face that would hold three Days of rain. Same thing in a health club which is a popular place to shop. Everyone holds in their stomachs and looks healthy when they re overheated. There Are few matrimonial meccas that bring out the real personality. The one that emerges after he wedding dress has been cleaned and stored and the canape Forks have been exchanged for two plastic garbage cans you want to shop for a mate try the local laundromat. This is a real test of what you re getting. Somehow even the hardest veneer of pretension will crack when an aggressive woman ties up three dryers and feels nothing and what kind of husband do you think a Man would make who goes o a bar for four hours and leaves a sleeping bag in a soak Cycle life can t get any More real than thai this May come As a Surprise but a dentist s office May reveal vital information about a future mate. Check out the single men in the reception room. Are they Able to tolerate pain or do they request novocain and take Oil from v Jerk for three Days when they have their Teeth cleaned and took closely at the single women. Are they meeting their financial needs or Are they putting off major Root canals bonding and braces until they re married and have group insurance spend at Leas one Mother s Day with your respective mothers before you decide on marriage. The Man will have a glimpse at his future by looking at his prospective Mother in Law and if a Man gives his saturday september 6, 1986 Mother a gift certificate for a flu shot the prospective wife can figure out this is As Good Asil gets. I always Felt divorce could be minimized if you visited a car showroom together Al least once before you made the big commitment Waich the face of the Man when he is surrounded by new cars. Does to forget your name does he look at a foreign car the same Way he used to took at you the first time he saw you in a Bikini does he offer to Trade you in Lor a foreign Model he can t pronounce do you get the feeling the payments will last longer than your marriage and he will enjoy them More people shop for a bathing suit with More care than they do a husband or a wife. The rules Are basically the same. Look for something you la fool comfortable wearing for a Long Lime. Allow for room to grow. And Don t panic the stars and stripes Page 17