European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - May 1, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse                                The stars and stripes Friday May 1,1987 columns where Are All the plumbers by Andy Rodney for the past few Days i be spent Moil of the time in my woodworking shop making a complicated Little Oak Stool for Emily. I like the whole process of writing but when i gel Back there in my workshop 1 notice thai i m quite contented. Yesterday i worked until 2 to before i remembered i had t eaten lunch. It even has occurred to me that i could give up writing and spend the rest of my life making pieces of furniture that amuse me. Who knows 1 might get Good at in. It s a Irtys Iery to me Why More people Don t derive their satisfaction from working with their hands. Somehow a Hundred or More Cara ago something strange happened in this country. Americans began to assume that till the people who did the Good hard work with their hands were not As smart As those who worked exclusively with their brains. The carpenters the plumbers the mechanics the painters the electricians and the Farmers were put in a social category of their own below the one the banker the insurance salesmen the doctors and lawyers were in. Tie join that required people to work with their hand were generally lower paying jobs and the people who took hem had less education. Another strange thing has happened in recent years it s almost As though the working people who really know How to do something other than make Money arc striking Back at the while Collar society. In All but the top executive jobs the Blue Collar workers Are malting As much or More than the teachers the accountants and the airline clerks. The apprentice carpenters Are making More than the Young people starting out As Bank clerks. Master craftsmen in any line Are making 160,000 a year and Many arc making double thai. In most Large cities automobile mechanics charge 145 an hour. A Mechanic in los Angeles or new York working in the service department of an authorized car dealer can make 160,000 a year. A sanitation worker in Chicago can make $35,000 a year. All this has happened in part at least because the fathers who were plumbers made enough Money to Send their children to College so they would t have to be plumbers. It s hand to understand Why we re so Short of people who do things Well with their hands. You can Only conclude hat it s because of some mixed up tense of values we have that makes us hink it is More prestigious to sell House As a real estate person than it is to build them As a Carpenter. To further confuse the matter when anyone who works mostly with his brain As i do does something with his hands As when 1 make a piece of furniture friends Are envious and effusive with Praise. So How come the people who do it professionally and infinitely belter than i do arc l in the country club if i be lost you in going the Long Way around to make my Point my Point is that considering How satisfying it is to work with your hands and consid ering Liow remunerative those jobs have become it is curious that More Young people coming out of school Aren t learning a Trade instead of becoming salesmen. Yes Cousin Bubba really exists by Joe Murray it s not easy being a celebrity. The costs Are High and the Public requires payment on demand. Just the other Day for instance i was Al the cafe wanting nothing More Ihan 10 cat lunch when a woman fan approached me. "1 Don l want to interrupt she said interrupting bul i read your column and there s something i be always wanted to ask  that s what i m Here for 1 said smiling warmly while my food grew cold. Tell me the said almost pleading. Is Here real a a Cousin Bubba indeed there n and he s quite a celebrity too thanks to the Bubba chronicles thai have appeared in this space Over the years. My Small claim to Fame is simply As Bubba s Boswell. Yet 1 have purposely clouded his True identity and must continue to do so nol so much for his Protection As for mine. Cousin Bubba jealously treasuring his privacy As he does says he will beat me up if i Ever use his full name in print i have no doubt that he would. 1 grew up with Bubba beating me up. Bul his much 1 can Tell yen we were born just in Days apart went from the Firel Grade through High school together and lived on the same Block for most of our lives our houses separated by an Alley that ran past i horse pen. Bubba loved his horse and his horse loved Bubba i haled his horse and his horse loved to throw and trample me. That horse and Bubba were a lot alike. But Bubba was no bully. Fact is the bravest act i Ever witnessed was Bubba with his right Arm in a cast backing Down an older kid who was the neighbourhood Tough. I think Bubba was 9 year old at the time. The second bravest act 1 eve witnessed was Bubba standing up to hat horse of his holding his ground As the horse charged him cracking it across its face with a Hack Amore and All bul bringing the Beasi to its Knees. One blow was All it took. Bubba was about 11 Al the time. Bubba still recall hat horse fondly. In a Way so do. Every time i open a can of dog food i think of thai horse and smile. What else can i Tell you Bubba was Best Man in my wedding we kept each other company when our children were being born and when our fathers died. There s much much More but i la save those stories for another time. Suffice it say that yes Viiginia. There is a Cousin Bubba. I can Only wonder what May come of All of this. 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