European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - June 18, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Teaching no substitute for the experience by John Windrow Magazine editor lockers slammed in the Hall Inri hundreds of feet tramped past Lite doorway. Barni Infin n boy called out the sound becoming fainter As it carried Down the hallway bouncing off he lock re amid the shuffling eel and Babel of voices "biitm.iaa.in,two girls peered through the door it me Good old me silting a the leather s desk in first period Reading class. Who s Tho new sub the first girl asked. I Don l know Hei Friend replied. I knew. I sat at the desk looking Over the folder left for me by the regular teacher. I recalled thai 1 had been at a party when a agreed to substitute teach for a Day just to see what it was like. If you malty want something interesting to write about the woman had said you should go and substitute teach for a Day in a Junior High  ii was a Good party the kind where one is Apt to Drift into a Cavalier mood and agree to do foolish tilings. Why not i us 1 trunk i d make for a great  realizing that she. Had a live one the Tady scribbled Down name. Here s the name of the principal at Darmstadt Germany Junior High she said. To h tall and let her know you re  dodos schools employ hundreds of substitute teachers Al Over Europe. They can make about $50 far furl Day of teaching. Requirements vary by Community. Some administrators require a cortege degree other s do not an ability to work with Young people and Mil on one s feel helps a great Deal. Everybody at the party agreed that it was a splendid idea for me to try in on the Magdar there had been some ribbing in the teachers lounge before classes started. Just put on your halt jacket and get Down  laugh. Took Mem or they la eat you  More laughter. We have a special valium Tablet for you after if Al  More yuks Giggle and knowing smiles. Inside the folder i found the attendance Roll a lesson plan some helpful notes about How to get through the Dass. Also there were a raft of forms for absences sickness tardiness discipline problems emergency drills Field trips and a Host of other contingencies 1 shuffled through them. The Bell rang and the kids streamed in. Then i remembered i a supposed logo and stand out in the hah Way Between classes to serve As an authority Symbol Don t forget the principal. Pal Steinkuehler had said Rostand out in the Hall Between  i d forgotten. Of Well there were plenty of other periods. The students in my Reading class started to do other tilings that i d already neglected. A tall pleasant kid named due handed out the books without being asked. Quarles look the lunch count and gave it to me. Another kid read be announcements they All wanted to know who i was and what to Call me. After that was settled they wanted to know where were the grades from the last test who was supposed to sign up for the end of the year Field trip could they go to the Library could they go to the nurse could they go to the bathroom and what were we jog to do today anyhow i d forgotten what it was like to be around people with so much Energy and spontaneity. They wriggled in their seals like Worms in hot ashes waiting for me to do something. I decided to Start off the class on a Light hearted note a few moments of casual Lalk before we wrestled with the Heady concepts of higher knowledge. Well i said who s going to win the Aba play offer the raw of kids to my left looked at me As if i were a blathering Moron. The ukers they All shouted incredulous that i would even ask. To my right another Row threw heir hands Over their faces in despair lore their garments and then yelled out the celtics it look some minutes to get things quieted Down. Making a mental note to avoid that subject for the rest of the Day i Lold them to open their books lovage 45. We read aloud a Story about two soviet parents who gave up their spaces in a bomb shelter during a nuclear War so sme Little children might survive. For the next to minutes we discussed nude of , Loving one s neighbor As one s self family Devotion communism the will to survive love sex and death. One kid named Charles said tie wanted to build a bomb shelter and Only let females  big for his age Charles was. The Beh rang and they clattered away evidently Happy about the ways things had gone. I Felt like i d put in a Good Day. There were six periods to go. The next period was Idle and i could prepare to teach music the third and fourth periods. Learning How to carry a tune or read music in one hour seemed impractical. I did find the music room. When the third period Bell rang worked my Way through the churning humanity in the Halls forgetting again to stand by the Wall and serve As an authority figure. Many of the boys were zipping along ramming Inlo each other with shoulders and elbows grinning gleefully saying excuse me. Of excuse me they seemed to be having a delightful Lime. When i got to the music room the kids had steady arrived found All the drumsticks and were lustily banging away on everything in sight Drums chairs desktops books and each other. It was not soothing. By the time i got the drumsticks collected and put away i fell like i d taken guns and whisky away from the indians. Deciding that it would be Foolhardy in the extreme to give lessons on the various instruments i could t play 1 lectured on blues musicians sleepy John Esles Hammie Nixon a Rainey and Bessie Smith. The students were unmoved. They asked if they could play a tape and dance. I readily Jurt cd. They were wild for .1 group  d club Nouveau. I did t understand the music but i m try do own Here to toil you this those seventh graders could dance. The girls thai is. The boys were Loo shy except for one kid who combed his hair like Clvis Presley and a incl cd like a Ballet Star undergoing electro Shock therapy. The girls pranced around like Gazelles like peacocks like antelopes. During the next music period a kid named Lason came in looking for his Grade. It was his tast by he said he was going Back to new Jersey. He d been in Germany for four year. I did t have his Grade and did t know Whereto go it. He did asked if he could go to the office Ami come Back. Upon his return he went Over in a Corner and said Good by to a pal named Michael you re Gonna have to write to Michael was . I asked Jason How he d found his time in Germany. It  Good it first he said but then Ingol  until i came Michael said. Mithael was a Small Birdlike Blond kid with big glasses. Then it got fun  after lunch a student slops to read Trofe on Chr door about overdue Library Boals. Trip it mtg Aine line 18, 1907