European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 14, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse Saturday. November 14, 1987 the stars and stripes an Rilanders dear Ann Landers my problem i am Gay. Actually being Gay in t the problem. I came 10 terms with my sexual orientation several years ago and have no in Terest in going straight if such a thing were possible which i seriously doubt. The problem is that women arc attracted to me and they won i leave me alone. 1 am Good looking sensitive funny Well educated Well travelled ambitious t successful and masculine. I am up front about being Gay always a have been and never experienced y the trauma of coming Oul of the closet because 1 was never in one. I appear everywhere with my Friend and although we Don t live together the nature of our relationship is Well known. In spite of this women keep trying to get me to go 1o bed with them. Some Are sure they can change me convinced that if tried heterosexual love i would prefer in. 1 cannot understand Why so Many women refuse to accept the fact that 1 am not turned on by them. Is it their vanity or insanity they All ask the same ques Tio Haven t you Ever wanted to be with a woman and. How do you know you Aren t interested if you be never tried it another favorite question Don l you want children the wont part is that i am unable to maintain a Friendship with a woman because everything goes sour when i Tell her that i am not interested in becoming intimate. She feels rejected and uncomfortable in my presence and tries to avoid me. Please Ann Landers make in Clear that Gay men would Tike to be accepted for what they Are we Don l want to try anything else and we wish our women friends would Knock it off. New York. . Here is Yoor letter. I Don t have one thing to add. Vou w said it All. Thanks for tiling in behind the scene and letting is see life from Tolly different Vantage Point i m sort great Nuny people Learned today. Dear Ann Landers i am a 43-year-old woman with a Job and three children 13, 16 and 17.1 also help with farming and ranching. My problem is that i am sexually starved. My husband has nude love to me three times in the last year. The last time was nearly six months ago. I am a Christian with High moral standards. I do not read trashy magazines nor do i watch soap operas or x rated films. To put it simply my body ii in need of More sen. I have been honest with my husband As i dare but he Telli me be is tired and that maybe be will feel like it next 1 am embarrassed by my dreams i try to make myself attractive to him every Way possible. He never notices a new Nightie or a new hair do. Anniversaries and Valentine Day Are the same a any other Day to him. When i ask him if he loves me he says i m Here. What More do you want a Tew Days ago he Learned that i titled 10 percent of Ray paycheck la the Church. This made him very angry. I do not believe in divorce and must find a Way to make thu manage work. Can you help me Ann Landers unfulfilled and praying for Wisdom Utah Dow Utah i Mie la prayer too but god can t a ii All Lliran stat please talk to you Clergyman. And Don t be ashamed to Dur be the problem in full. Toto to to a marriage i iia Aii in Klimt if Jutt Arnt Rayarl or fun Jet inf it we Juk he Bauer of do. To need Cluj Wiig gel us and emotional Epport from a professional who Bufe Staada. Good lock and god men. Page 11 letters Latchkey child not a problem they say i read your articles about Latchkey children As n working Parent i would like to express my opinion. Your articles implied that All children who arc left alone either before or after school have lots of prob lems. My husband is in the army. I work for the army Asa civilian. My children Are ii 10 Ami 6 years old. I have been working for the past 2 i years. Before arriving in Germany i was a Normal i stayed Home for nine years with my children before entering the work Force. While at Home 1 laugh them discipline morals Independence safety every Day common Courtesy to family friends and neigh Bors. Of course 1 showered them with lots of love and care t was building a foundation for my children that they could lean on so when the Day came when both parents were not around they could always fait Back on their i Hope this will always hold them up in this rough life. Feeling confident that i had instilled in my Chil Dren a solid foundation i joined the work Force. In took some adjusting for the whole family. My Hus band who is a Loving and understanding Man sup ported the family during this transition. He has Al ways been a great family Man. Of course at limes the children will say i miss you. instinctively i have Mother s Guild but Only for a minute. My children Are doing Well in school. My son is in the tag talented and gifted program and also in the drama club. My daughter is in the chorus and dance group and also is the head librarian for her class. is still quite shy about joining any groups. They Are productive Well adjusted children though they have both parents who work. Concerning safety with Latchkey children. The school nurse from bad Kreuz Nach said. Some of these children have been told to go Home and lock the door and not let anyone in. I m concerned what if there s a fire this is where fire Protection and safety come in. My children Are always aware of the hazards of Are. They slay away from the stove when we Are not Home but when we Are Home they Cook us breakfasts on weekend mornings. They Are also told not to open the door for anyone but Are also told that when there is an emergency Are etc., to eel to the nearest exit. They have fire lessons at school and at Home. Of we did Send them to the Latchkey program for a few months. They enjoyed it for a while but soon it became a bore. They were the ones who asked my husband and 1 not to Send them Back anymore. They said they could do their Homework better at Home where it is much quieter. After finishing their Home work they Are Busy with their daily chores. When i pen pals get Home from work 1 find my children Reading books or doing chores. No the television is not on and the Var is quiet too. Rule is no to until Home work and chores arc done. In conclusion. I Hope that this letter makes it Clear that not All children suffer because they Are left alone. All parents who work Are not to blame for All their children s problems. You cannot stereotype All parents As the main problem of All Latchkey children. Remember the saying. It s not the Quantity hut the Quality of time that enhances your relationship with your Susan Calica Garth sch Germany every time i pick up the stars and stripes it seems there s another program being started to re Lieve parents of parental responsibility. Now i Sec where Usa eur is planning on spending $1 6 Mil lion to alleviate the Latchkey children problem. I assume this amount of Money originated with the taxpayer and personally i resent in. It s not bad enough that the army it actively promoting the operation of Day care centers in family housing Qunitera. My wife is forbidden by regulation from operating a business from our quarters should she choose to do so. But import kids into the stairwell for pay go for in we Are the proud Parent of three Honor student sons. When the first one was born my wife decided that her first obligation and primary responsibility was to raise our children. She maintained that priority for the next 17 years and Only recently went Back to work part time. She i still Home when the Igidi arrive. All i hear is we need two incomes in order to Dull. We survived Wherry was an e-4 in Germany when the Dollar was just Ai bad As it is now. Sure we did without a lot of Nice to have amenities and we ate a lot of hamburger but if one of the kids fell and skinned Hii knee he could ran to mom instead of mrs. Pablo old Down the Street regulations stale that sponsors arc Rispon Ficle for their family member. A these programs dreamed up by Usa eur and acs just Point up the fact that Ilain t so. A final word on the much touted child care viders when r ice. Toddlers being dragged or car ried crying at 6 . Up the stairs in our stairs do to be damped for the next 12 hours r wonder what really constitutes child abuse. Parents if you want children then take the responsibility for raising them. 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