European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 20, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse Friday. November 20. 1987 the stars and stripes an it Landers Page 11 letters dear Ann Landers can you stand another throw the bum out Teller i refer to the woman whose cheating husband had a stroke and now she wants to know i she should Lake him Back. Some of the women who wrote said the wife was a fool to consider such a thing. They insisted that she should Lake him wheelchair and All and dump him and his belong in Harj Surks. Roberts desertion Case draws comments there s an awfully Good Chance Hal his mistress won l take him in which Case t Hope the wife delivers him to the nearest nursing Home. I was married 10 one of those . S for 1 7 years and discovered that he had a whole other family on a farm 40 mites from Here. I Don l know How i could have been so dumb. There were dilate signs All Over the place bul i suppose when a woman does t wan to face up to the Liuch she can be awfully Blind. How did the mail run on that one Annie i d love to know. Albany Alice dear Alicet ran to to 1 in Fluor of throwing the Btu out here1 another oat dear Ann Landers i la never be Able 10 repay you for running Hal letter Aboul the unfaithful husband who had a stroke. His wife did t know whether to Lake him Back or wheel him Over to his sweetie s House so she could have the worst Yean of his life Tince she had enjoyed the Best. My husband fooled around for at least 1 5 years Hal i knew of. 1 kept telling myself Hal the kids needed a father although he was never at Home and paid very Little attention to hem. Two years ago Lover boy developed a kidney prob Lem and his blood pressure shot Way up. The doctor prescribed Medicine and told us both Hal the pills might interfere with our sen life you have a Choice the doctor said. Either take the pills or risk gelling a my husband flatly refused to take the pills. Since i was gelt ing very darned Lille sex from him i knew he was saving himself for another woman. When i read that letter in your column. Ann. I packed my husband s bags and told him to go to her and Kay there because i was filing for divorce. Would you believe hat Wilh in two weeks he had a stroke Lucky for me 1 had already seen my lawyer so no one could say i threw out a sick Man. My con science is Clear and i Haven t been hit Happy in years. Ann i owe you a Tot. Dallas dear Dallas what a Story thank for Sharif. Dear Ann Landers 1 am seven months pregnant Wilh my first child. I am a Branch manager Al a Bank and had decided to go Back to work full Lime after my three month maternity leave is Musl confess that As my due Dale cars i am losing Confidence in my decision. Do you believe it is really of to leave my baby when he she is so Young my husband and 1 make very Good Money and ran afford excellent Day care. But my career is important to me and i worked awfully hard to gel where i am i m afraid if 1 am away Loo Long i May lose out. Many career women leave very Young babies these Days. It seems to be expected will you help me make a decision Cleveland dilemma dear cd a saw new a then Matt Back to work Bat How ice in have the Lowary of a Emee. Since Yoa Are dearly anal Lent i rest that Yon titty at Home for a year. The a Dot to Tell be fairly solid 7 then and you la be glad Jot did. You Sec contrary to what Iti previous writer thought pvt. Wade Robert problems were very real to him but to you and hundreds of go hrs like you they were Penny i think it was a cold Day in hell to cause a Soldier 10 run to the soviet Union in order id eel away from his unit. It was very sad that he had to Lake that recourse. He knew he was doing wrong and he knew he had done wrong a. So he took the appropriate Steps to undo lilt wrong be Snoura of to in Jig to Ger Back Home instead of having you lash out Al him. He did not make that decision to defect All by him if. He had the help of a desperate woman. We know the influence a lot of women hive in our lives Don t we in j people like Tome of these writers who caused pvt Roberts to defect they Are typical yes men who would be Loo scared and afraid to stick their necks out for a subordinate Tor fear thai their almighty career would be jeopardized. A subordinate is of milk or no consequence when he she comes up against their enlisted evaluation report if subordinates Are treated Wilh a Lillic respect Cour Lesy and dignity and if you d listen to them once in awhile for a change you u find they la move a Moun Tain for you. You la Abo find less awol suicides murders open rapists Etc i Hope Hal hit defection will open the eyes and ears of our Leaden of today and Hal they will see a moral to this Story. I know what pressure and harassment in the army is All about. I know All about the Chain of command. The Chain of command has never worked and never will. Ten thousand soldiers will agree with me. 1, docs served my time and worked very hard. The last six Yean i was working a minimum of 60 hours a week. 1, Loo had to run after 12 Yean to save Whit was left of my Pride dignity sanity and most important my life. I did not defect. Of course i was older and Wiser than pal. Roberts but when suicide entered my mind on one of my Many sleepless nights i knew then hit it was time Tor Roe to get out thank god for end of term of service. Name and location withheld pal Wade Roberts departed on a plane for it. Din n a and his possible court martial but along the Way be u screaming Hal be made a Deal and Hal he will not be court Martiale for desertion. I As 3 non commissioned officer Hope Hal the . Army realizes what will happen to discipline and order if this Soldier is allowed to Deal and ii excused from his proper and just punishment for the Fleme that he commuted. There Are no mitigating circumstances in this Case no defense thai is acceptable to me As a Soldier. I believe thai i speak for most of the soldiers in usar eur both enlisted and officer. Just imagine whal will happen to the discipline in his unit and throughout Usa eur if disgruntled soldiers arc allowed to make a mockery of what we in fact swear to do when we Lake an oath of enlistment or re enlistment to obey the orders of those appointed Over us and to abide by the uniform code of military Justice. Granted this is a worst Case scenario bul All the military has to do is Grant one exception and the rest will follow. Pvt. Roberts did not desert Over 0 years guards risk tace i Sisera War Wah a valid reason. By failing to have him serve a sentence at it. Leavenworth or it. Kiley the army will in fact create an open door policy for widespread Dis enl and unrest in the military. Pvt. Roberts needs to be aware Hal the military was not just a Job thai you walk away from when things do not go u you think they should bul Corn ailment that requires unswerving dedication to duty and unquestioning obedience to orders no matter if in his opinion they made people act like robots. Sgt. Suzanna Mac Sty to Enburg Germany just a moment ago t concluded the Reading of All three letters which were a More than obvious rebuttal to pvt. Wade Roberts decision id return to the United Stales. Such Letten a. These can Only remind me of the spoiled nature of americans and just How narrow minded we arc. I cannot exempt myself from this category Only be cause 1 consider myself a proud american. However i perhaps think in a different Way and obviously apply different morals to different situations. In any Case who has the right to decide whal Ihil Young Man was thinking who has the right to make up his mind who has the right to conclude his Region in were fictitious Only one Man. Wade Roberts. It seems As though everyone is very Quick to judge and yet so hesitant to Slop and think. Wade Roberts obviously has Good reason in wanting to return to the United states in is the Best however let us keep in mind one thing Roberts did not leave the United states he escaped Only from the grasp of the army s hungry claw in West Germany. It is More than obvious that be did not and would not leave the sunny beaches of California for a very lonely and desolate communist country. In the society in which we live it it a very easy task to become narrow minded and so ideological which b made obvious by the rent letters. I try to imagine what this Young Man was thinking and How very con fused he became. 1 cannot. Neither can anyone else. Wade Roberts if you re out Here. I wish you the Best any time you want to gel waxed and catch a wave you May use Rny Board and swag my Rona. Pet. Robert t. Sparks Kilz Roaen Germany wife helps husband but has her own life after Reading the recent idler from the warrant officer s wife 1 fell the need to respond. I support my husband s Job and the things thai go along with that Long hours exercises Lale night Telephone Calls. 1 also enjoy helping with company and battalion functions and i will Lake leave from my Job when necessary to participate in those functions. However they Are not he Only things in my life. I have my own Job and inheres is and i do not need 10 live my life through my husband s accomplishments. I am very proud of whal he docs Yel t would rather someone rape i me for my own Sake rather than to whom i am married. I feel very old when someone Calls me a am i can Only wonder if women who Wear their Hus band s rank do so because icy do Noi feel Here is anything else of importance in their own lives t have talked to Many officers wives who feel the same Way i do. 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