European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - March 10, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Columns it s time to Start planning that summer vacation by Dave Barry Knight Kidder  once again it a tint to Start planning your Bummer Vir Linn i jul special Lime of year when you attempt to experience some memorable moments so  you can cherish hem for a Lif mime in the form of color photographs stored in cardboard boxes. That s How or Chi fish our photographs. We gel them Hack from the drugstore ind we stuff them into 3 cardboard Box and put them in the closet and we never look at them again for the rest of our lives. There it no need in because we Are confident thai each picture will show an unidentifiable person who appears to be four. Inches Tell standing in front of a memorable object such As he Lincoln memorial the grand Canyon Italy goofy at Disneyland Elc. The fact is nil vacation photograph look he same. Thai s Iho secret behind one of the greatest inventions in photographic history the Polaroid camera which was invented in 1948 by he Mark for whom in is named Koacr Polaroid camera. One Hay Roger was fooling around Wilh some chemicals and a thought occurred to him instead of wasting a lot of time developing people s vacation photographs you could sell them him Wilh the pictures already on in. Thai Way a person com take a picture of a loved one standing in front of a memorable object and Presto out would pop an instant photograph to be cherished. The object in this photograph is actually the municipal building in Baynesville Ohio and the Liny unidentifiable figure is a  named Loona Dinn gun Ersleen who died in 1958. Still she continues to appear in every single Polaroid picture taken by anyone anywhere in the world. The next big photographic Advance came when the companies that develop regular film realized they did t have to keep track of whose film was whose and started sending vacation photographs Back to people at random. If you were to examine the tiny figures in your vacation photographs under a Magn Hying Glass you would quite possibly discover thai All these years you have been cherishing he memories of a family of North koreans. But the Point is it does t Mailer because you never look at your photographs anyway unless you Are one of those spiteful people who Lake color slides and then Force innocent people to sit in a darkened room and look Al sem focused pictures of tiny North koreans while you and your spouse argue bitterly for 2 5 minutes about whether this particular slide depicts your trip to Wyoming in b4 or Utah in 65. Or worse you show people your Home videos in which he camera is constantly waving around As though it had been strapped to the head of a Young and unusually hyperactive Cocker Spaniel. I am telling you this As 3 Friend nobody wants to look Al your Home videos unless they involve people who Are attractive. Interesting and above All naked. Which reminds me of a concept i though up during this past Holiday season when we received a Bunch of those mass produced newsletters that people write droning an and on about How they Nad yet another triumphant year in which their entire family got elected to the . Senate. It occurred to me that what these newsletters Lack is an element thai most of us look for in our pleasure Reading dirty parts next Holiday season i want you family newsletter writers to see if you can t put a Little size into your writing something along the tines of this ii iks been � very exciting year for the hendersons especially Young triad1, who finally left the nest and headed off to Cattese Whereon his very first night he heard a Knock and opened his door to find the entire women s gymnastics team standing there and combining of lower Back pain prompting thud who plans Loma or in premed to alertly. But we Are Drifting away from our topic which is go Back and Check if you Don t believe me planning your summer vacation. This year we travel experts Are recommending that you to not go abroad because the Dollar is weak. These Days if you attempt to give dollars to a waiter in say France he will laugh and spit on your cheesecake. Of course French waiters will generally do Ihu anyway but when the Dollar it Strong they Wail until you re not looking. So this year we Are recommending that you consider a kind of vacation that costs remarkably Little yet can result in countless memorable hours of trying unsuccessfully to k i up raccoons from stealing your breakfast. That s right we re talking about a family camping trip which we will discuss in explicit detail in our next column. Until then we urge you to Ponder the words of the great author and naturalist Henry David Thoreau. Who said Cyl there Are Icse things in my sleeping bag How to let people know your birthday s coming by miss manners United feature Syndicate dear miss manners what if any in the Correct Way to Lei people know one has a birthday coming up and would like to be remembered i m not ailing about expensive presents bul just a card or warm greeting or Small remembrance so my special Day won t be a total waste. I must Tell you hat i m usually the one to bake the birthday cakes Send the car buy the gifts Elc., since my mind in like a file Cabinet of Calendar dates. I Don t expect everyone else to have this phenomenal memory but Why is in thai they usually forget my birthday there must be a polite Way to bring it up in conversation without making in sound like a Broad hint Lor gifts. I m not a kid or i Len Ager just a recycled one living in prime Lime. Centle Reader miss manners appreciates your recognizing that your expectation is both unreasonable and childish. Presumably we arc not talking about reminding your Mother of your Birl Lully but about More or less casual friends who neither have your sort of memory nor expect you to Coto Drate their birthdays. As Long As thai is understood and you Don t use the occasion to mope and pout and draw tragic Cone lesions about the failure of your life and the callousness of the world she is willing to help you. Oddly enough the solution is a mild version of this something along the lines of wow i can t believe i m going to be 33 on wednesday. Really makes you Stop and think does t if dear miss manners my daughter had a Beautiful wedding and reception and ii broke my heart to lipid out a few months later that she was three months pregnant at the Lime of the wedding. I am ashamed and embarrassed about its my sister who gave a bridal Shower for my daughter would like to have a baby Shower for her. Under the circumstances i Don t feel Reghl about his. Do you think it is in poor Tastet Centle Reader relatives do not correctly act As Hosli of showers which should be Given Only by friends of the guest of Honor. If you wish to invoke this Rule to assuage your unfortunate feelings you certainly May but miss manners can t help wishing you would t. She sees nothing to be gained by retroactive shame at a Lime when the family should be looking ahead to welcoming your grandchild. Dear miss manners should t the people who Are in charge of a relative have the decency to notify other of that person death especially if they inherit All belongings and Mon Cyl i worked Wilh a woman far 11 Yean and wrote to her after i retired to another City. My letters cards and gifts were in her Home weeks after the death. I called and wat told the had died and was burled. There should have been some kind of notice Given to me As i wat devoted to her 1 was her second Mother for Many Yean. I always reply to messages or inquiries after much loss and thank the people who cared enough to by a Lew words on a sympathy card. Am i wrong Centle Reader of course you Are not wrong to respond to expressions of sympathy but that is not quite the same thing As knowing whom to notify when a death occurs. Both Are duties of survivors bul acknowledging expressions of sympathy blocs not require any research. One simply answers these As they come in. Taking the initiative to gel in Louch with people who care is also an obligation bul one must find out who those people Are. Some May be known and often the family will use the deceased s address Book to guess who would want to attend the funeral. Occasionally even a Good Friend May be overlooked. Miss manners requests that you Lake this graciously As an unfortunate Accident and not let it inhibit your expressions of sympathy to the heirs. Dear miss manners is it proper or embarrassing to tend Lowers including dailies a red Rose and baby s breath loan attorney and his Secretary As a thank you gesture Centle Reader miss manners suppose that someone has compiled a lexicon in which this combination of Flowers says thank you for getting such a generous out of court  bul she would prefer Hal you preserve a Businesslike Demeanour and write i hem both or each a gracious letter expressing your appreciation in a More intelligible fashion. Have i question on  write to miss manners in Are of the Lars and stripes. Apo 09211, your question will be forwarded to her. Miss manners regrets that she can Only answer questions in her column. Mirth 10, Tutt