European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - July 25, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Does marriage mean happiness by Laura Mansnerus new York times Hether being married leads to happiness or being Happy leads to marriage the positive relation Between the two has been considered something of a sociological fact for years. Now according to one of the researchers who established the correlation marriage in the United states is not what it used to be. In analysing 15 years of Survey data Norval d. Glenn a sociologist at the University of Texas has found that while married people Are still More Likely than unmarried people to report they Are very Happy in life the Gap Between the two groups has narrowed. Glenn and other sociologists have noted a strengthening of some familiar trends fewer Young people Are marrying living together is More socially acceptable and remaining single is no longer regarded As strange. Andrew Cherlin a professor of sociology at Johns Hopkins University said that As the number of single people grows it would be expected that that group would attract a number of healthy attractive individuals who just decided not to get married a Large number who would not be that different from married  that marriage would suffer by comparison was Glenn s Hunch. To test it he said he and another researcher Charles n. Weaver of St. Mary s University in san Antonio turned to the source Glenn used in a 1975 article on the same subject the general social surveys conducted annually by the National opinion research Center at the University of Chicago. In the surveys 1,500 people around the United states 18 years old and older Are asked questions in face to face interviews including whether they Are generally very Happy pretty Happy or not too  Glenn s suspicions were confirmed especially for the baby Boom generation. Among the 2,335 people age 25 to 39 surveyed from 1972 through 1976, the difference Between the very Happy responses of married and never married people was 20.5 percentage Points for men and 29.2 percentage Points for women. Among the 2,823 people in that age category surveyed from 1982 through 1986, the differential was 5.7 percentage Points for men and 12.2 for women. It is time to question the belief widely held by family social scientists that the institution of marriage in this society remains As Strong and viable As Ever Glenn and Weaver wrote in the journal of marriage and the family. These findings were also highlighted by the surveys the percentage of very Happy responses among never married men age 25 to 39 has increased appreciably from 13.2 percent in 1972-76 to 24.3 percent in 1982-86. Changes among women age 25 to 39 who have never married Are harder to Analyse. The 1982-86 responses show some increase in happiness but Are too Small to be statistically reliable. Among All married women still the happiest group the percentage describing themselves As very Happy declined from 43.1 percent in 1972-76 to 39.7 percent in 1982-86. The decline was larger from 42.9 percent to 36.6 percent among married women age 25 to 39. Overall the percentage of women who reported being very Happy declined from 36 percent in 1972 76 to 32.3 percent in 1982-86. In the same period the percentage of men who said they were very Happy declined from 32 percent to 30.1 percent. People who Are divorced or separated remained the unhappiest group. Their very Happy responses increased slightly to 17.7 percent for men and 19.3 percent for women. In several recent articles and in a Telephone interview Glenn offered several possible explanations for the results. He said the benefits that people seek in marriage have become widely available to single people in socially acceptable ways. Chief among them sex for men and financial Security for women. At the same time although divorce rates have levelled off in recent years the instability of the institution is disco fiting to those who Are already married or thinking about marriage. People Are not going to make a big investment in a marriage that May not last Glenn said. Their unwillingness to make the investment to make an economic argument in terms of time and Money and forgone Opportunity and so Forth will in and of itself make the marriage  finally he said responses to other questions in the surveys indicate that an important Factor in declining satisfaction among younger married women is the conflicting demands of Job marriage and children a conclusion that the Rev. Andrew Greeley the sociologist novelist and columnist has reached in a separate analysis of the data from the general social surveys. Glenn s observation that people Are not Rushing into marriage like they used to appears to be an understatement. In 1985, the last year for which the National Center for health statistics has data 94.9 of every 1,000 unmarried women age 15 to 44 married within the Calendar year in 1972, the figure was 141.3 women. If the current rates for each age group continue the health statistics Center estimates Only 70 percent of american women will Ever marry the rates for 1973 indicated that 87 percent would. In the data Glenn used the percentage of women age 25 to 39 who were married declined sharply from 79 percent in the 1972-76 samples to 61 percent in the 1982-86 samples. According to census Bureau data from last year there Are about 110.4 million married people 4.6 million who Are single but living with a person of the opposite sex and 71.5 million other single people. Several sociologists specializing in family issues said that the Glenn Weaver findings confirmed their observations. For example Frank f. Furstenberg or. Of the University of Pennsylvania said that marriage is less popular among the very groups who married a generation ago what he Calls the conventional  further perceptions have changed for men in particular. Men who weren t married by their late 20s in the 60s were oddballs Furstenberg said. Now they re just successful 29-year-olds." Glenn is less certain that self selection Well adjusted people marry and unhappy ones Don t was Ever an explanation for the correlation Between marriage and happiness. It could work the other Way around he said. Some experts also say people have become More critical of their marriages although Glenn said i Don t know of any compelling evidence that that s the  Furstenberg disagreed if people Are less Happy it might be that being less Happy just reflects growing discrimination and  Pepper Schwartz of the University of Washington who wrote american couples Morrow 1983 with Philip Blumstein echoed that comment you la still find that most people who Are married say they re happier to be married but they have More sophisticated measures to critique it with How equitable it is How sexually fulfilling it is How much the other person helps  if previous generations were happier in marriage she said it was probably because the More entrenched you Are in a system and the less you question its boundaries the More your likelihood of satisfaction Greeley who teaches at the University of Arizona and is affiliated with the National opinion research Center concluded in his study which he is preparing for publication that the decline in morale among women is concentrated among working mothers born after 1950, and most especially of All working mothers who were born in the 1950s who report High pressure worries about health and  he found that As a group these women seem to like marriage As much As their predecessors did at the same age. A very Likely explanation for their lower level of happiness he wrote is a heightened expectation for what a woman must be an expectation in herself at any  prenuptial stress Over the contract by Georgia Dullea new York times it was to be a june wedding. The caterer was hired the band booked the guests had sent in their  Days before the ceremony As the Bride was having a pedicure the bridegroom put his foot  the premarital contract he told her or be jilted. They were a professional couple living in Manhattan. She was 35 years old and never married. He was 45 and divorced with one child. Her net Worth was $300,000, his was Between $800.000 3nd $1 million. Under the proposed contract she would waive All rights to marital property under new York s divorce Law and a inheritance rights. Among its other provisions was a support schedule in the event of divorce for the children she hoped to have. When she saw the first draft she burst into tears said her lawyer Ralph Brozan. The final draft was objectively not fair and i strongly advised her not to  Damn it i signed it said the Bride in a phone Call to the lawyer on the night before the wedding. She said i could t face the humiliation of his not showing up " Brozan recalled. I Felt bad for  now they Are abroad on a honeymoon. For professionals who counsel couples moving in and out of marriage this Story has a familiar ring. When a Young woman begins talking marriage with an older Richer Man who has been married before the Issue of the premarital contract invariably surfaces. If the idea does not occur to the Man his lawyer is Likely to suggest a contract. One sound reason for this is to assure that part of the Man s estate at the time of the marriage will go to his children of a former marriage on his death. Premarital contracts which supersede both inheritance Laws and wills have Long been employed in estate planning for wealthy clients. In recent years men who Are not necessarily wealthy have been demanding other Legal concessions from second wives. Some seek pledges that the women will or will not Bear children. Some insist they sign away claims to property acquired during the marriage. Some want them to waive spousal support on divorce. Support waivers Are Legal in Many states including new York new Jersey and Connecticut but not in California and 10 other states. Men Are taking a much tougher position the second time around sign or stay single said Lester Wallman who is on new York state bar association s committee on legislative policy. Increasingly the courts Are upholding these prenuptial agreements provided both parties were represented by Independent counsel and providing there was no fraud or  women too Are demanding premarital contracts As Joan Collins s most recent divorce Case demonstrated. Some new York lawyers estimate that women have More assets than men in 20 percent of the premarital contracts they negotiate. But the vast majority of contracts Are still initiated by men they say and in certain cases women Are signing away important rights. As lawyers describe these cases the typical Man is Over 40, divorced and perhaps embittered by the settlement. In any event he wants to avoid the pain and expense of another Legal Wrangle and to provide for his children. He May have a business or professional practice he wishes to protect. He Hopes that the contract will Lead to Bliss but if not he has the escape route on paper. The woman is about 30, eager to marry and maybe to become a Mother. Often she has a Good Job though her paycheck May not be As hefty As her Fiance a and she prides herself on being self sufficient. She encourages him to be financially generous to his children if Only because she realizes she has to Deal with them. Having heard the sorry tales of his first marriage she vows that theirs will be a Loving partnership. By partnership she Means 50-50. The contract comes As a Shock say Counselor who see women in the throes of Legal pms or premarital stress syndrome. A common response is what does he take me for a Gold Digger Joann Magdoff a Board member of the new York association of marriage and family therapy said for most of these women Money is not Why they  complicating the picture she and others say is that part of what attracts the women to the men is Money Power and Success. When everything is spelled out in cold Legal language what s his and hers they have to Deal with that aspect of the relationship Magdoff said. He can t understand Why she in t signing Over the stuff. She can t understand Why he s asking her  faced with such a standoff some women make excuses for the Man or make sacrifices to prove their love. To me anyone who draws up a one sided contract like he did is very insecure said a woman of 35 whose divorce from a matrimonial lawyer 15 years her senior became final last week. Of  what i was signing she went on but i had to reassure him i was t marrying for Money. He even went so far As to put in the agreement that if either party started a divorce action i would have to vacate the apartment  when he pronounced the marriage dead after four years she said i found myself out in the  despite such stories even feminist minded lawyers like Harriet Pilpel Point out that a bad contract might still be a Good Gamble for women in their 30s who Are  they have known a number of men none of whom wanted to marry Pilpel said. Whatever happens could be no worse than what they re facing now working at an uninteresting Job for an inadequate salary without a mate watching their childbearing years slip  Pilpel said she would not presume to criticize these women for taking a Chance on love. There s always the not possibility that once the children come his attitude will change she said. Another possibility is to break the contract later. But courts around the country Are showing less and less willingness to Honor such claims. A new York appellate court recently found a Westchester county couple s contract valid even though the Man failed to fully disclose his financial status. An appellate court in Kansas upheld a contract granting the divorced wife of a multimillionaire Only $24,000 a year in spousal support. She had signed it one hour before the wedding. For the Bride who is forced to choose Between an unfair contract and a missing bridegroom still another possibility exists. Call his Bluff the lawyers say All cited cases in which Brave brides prevailed. In one Case both Bride and bridegroom were lawyers and the bridegroom s father was pushing for a contract he had millions Pilpel said and yet in the event of divorce she was to receive a Lump sum a fraction of what she would be entitled to under the  As Pilpel recalled the Story the Bride who was her client turned to bridegroom and said Darling i suppose this Means the wedding s off and i m so sorry but i cannot sign this paper. It would be unfair to me and to our future  he Tore up the contract. She kissed him. In marrying he defied his father but his father came around. Today they have two children and pots of Money Pilpel said. They Are living in absolute  Page 14 the stars and stripes the stars and stripes Page 15