European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - August 29, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse Page 10 the stars and stripes writers offer comments on child abuse discipline of children True child abuse kills 3,000 children per year and is therefore to be taken seriously. Current redefinitions of child abuse by pop psychologists which include everything from scolding to spanking Are making a laughingstock of a serious matter. As a physician i am called upon to examine victims of alleged child abuse or neglect. 1 have practice in Detroit mansion Row to skid Row Cowboy country and Indian reservations in addition to the military. I have seen cases that would make your skin crawl. Disturbingly however i am seeing More and More cases where nothing at All is found. Family a gets mad at family a and reports them for child abuse As a Retalia Tion. Teen Ager c gets a Friend to give her a Black Eye so that she can blackmail her parents into letting her stay out late or she will report them for child abuse at school the next Day. The above Are True cases. A recent study showed at least 7 percent of its child abuse cases were probably fraudulent and others have claimed that As Many As 60 percent were suspicious. Further clogging the system in addition to the fraudulent cases Are those where someone has decided to broaden the definition of child abuse. The writer of a recent letter to the editor is a Case in Point. Certainly driving with children unbuckled and letting children wander unsupervised after dark Are bonafide neglect. Taking a Tan Trum prone child to the commissary or spanking a child who fails to respond to other methods of discipline Are not. Parents Are reported for emotional abuse for Sim ply scolding their child. Even the Best adult will lose his Cool during periods of great stress. Children Are not born Well behaved. They Are con stantly pushing their limits and the Only Way they will learn to survive As adults is to be corrected. This correction May take Many legitimate forms. Some Chil Dren Are born with a mild disposition. If you Are firm but kind and Loving these children May Well respond satisfactorily. Most real children however can Manip ulate their Way around these disciplinary spanking a child who fails to respond to other Mea sures is not child abuse. Indeed with Many children sparing the Rod could be considered child neglect. We Are not talking Here about beating children up. We Are talking about giving them an unanswerable reason to Lis ten to other Means of discipline. Peace through strength is a legitimate deterrent in the Home As Well As in the world. True child abuse involves a risk to the child s life limb or health. By health we refer to things such As malnutrition unwarranted exposure to disease drug and alcohol addiction and the like. We Are not talking about hurting their feelings. I have witnessed children burned with cigarettes thrown Down stairs a 3-month-old who somehow crawled 10 Yards Down the Hal children beaten with boards with nails in them children whose feet had been placed in boiling water sexual abuse of infants and dead babies. These children need help. Please do not clog their lifeline the social service agencies with nuisance and fraudulent reports of child abuse. The above opinions Are mine and Are not official air Force policy. Or. Maj Thomas n. Beach Span Dahlem West Germany the writer stated that it made him angry to see How parents treat their children especially after he witnessed a Driver with an open Hatchback with two Small children in the Back and the exhaust fumes entering through the Hatchback. Although he was tired from running two Miles he still should have made the Effort to follow the car and get a glimpse of the License plate if he was As concerned As he claimed. Speaking of child abuse i agree wholeheartedly that children should not be beaten to where bodily harm is done or left in an unattended car while mom and dad Are taking care of errands or doing some shopping. But As a Parent we also have the responsibility to raise our children so they la turn out to be decent Law abiding and upstanding citizens. But the majority of children today have the tendency to push parents to a limit just for the Sake of seeing How far they can push and How much they can get away with. As for kicking screaming and being dragged by their Little arms through the commissary or the Exchange if parents were to let their children roam wherever they wanted to people would complain that parents could t control their children. Things would get picked up dropped or even broken and then who would be responsible the Parent naturally. It s not always possible to find a baby Sitter especially on Short notice. Also it is the parents prerogative if they want a Sitter or if they want to take their children with them. If a child does throw a fit because there is something he she sees or wants but can t have it certainly should be a Parent s right to give the child a Good slap on the Bottom right then and there without having to put up with people giving you dirty looks or making some sort of remark. Punishing the child later when it has forgotten what he she did will serve no purpose in teaching children right from wrong. We were All children at one time or another but i seriously doubt that any one of us dared to speak to our elders the Way kids talk to us today. It s not just teen agers who talk that Way. Even Small children Shock you the Way they talk whether it is to their parents or to other grown . Unless you have children of your own which i can see from your letter that you Don to you can t possibly know the things most parents have to put up with. Some kids even go so far As to threaten heir parents with bodily harm. Seems to me like the Only ones who Are being abused Are the parents More than anyone. Also As far As i m concerned a Good old fashioned spanking has never Hurt a kid yet even in today s world. People who Don t have children in my opinion should t be giving other people advice on How to raise their children. Baerbel Pelkey Stuttgart West Germany As a Mother of two boys i would like to speak out on behalf of All the Well meaning parents in the Community who Are doing their very Best to raise their children with Loving kindness. Had the writer stuck to his Point about the woman driving her children around with the Hatch Back open i would not be so angry. Good Point Crimi Nally negligent sounds vicious though. Note the writer has no children but seems to be an expert on How to discipline with firmness but kind and that sounds Good but we All As parents know it s just not always that easy. I can t wait until the writer has children someday so he can cat his words. His next statement if you think the Way to control them is to beat them into submission you be got an other thing coming is hardly comparable to a Good crack on the behind. I be Given in to my children too Many times already at the commissary and the Exchange and the Bank to satisfy you Well meaning child abuse accusers i Don t anymore. Kids Are smart. You give in and they be got you. From now on they la take advantage every minute they get in Public. I notice you withheld your name yet threatened me that you won t mind your own business the next time you see my kids kicking and screaming in the commissary. We re talking about serious accusations Here. You want the Security police to come and arrest me and then what Are you going to be there to take Over for me i know child abuse is out there i was an abused child. But even then the worst thing i could imagine was being taken away from my family. I m All for helping children who Are truly abused but i m sick and tired of defending myself to people like you when As a last resort i choose not to spare the i was enrolled in family Day care classes and had a very interesting lecture on child abuse. I got it straight from the expert that spanking is perfectly acceptable be Havior. Discipline is one of the hardest kindnesses parents can give to their children. I wish i was better at it. Times have changed. Almost All children Are spoiled nowadays. I think the word abuse Here needs a Little More defining. The next time you see me spanking my child in Public know it was my last resort. I am not ignorant and uncaring but the exact opposite and by god you had better mind your own business Karen Oleksa Ramst Einab West Germany. I agree with him that a lot of parents arc too careless with their children in that they Are left unattended and unsupervised at All hours of the Day and n ight. Apparently this person does not know too much about rearing children. When All else fails i spank my child. I do not apologize for it. I Don t care where i am or who is looking. I know a lot of people who let their kids stay out until 4 30 . Skateboarding and who let Little children under 2 wander on our Post because it is fenced in. To me that is child neglect and i have reported them. Apparently he has never been around a 2 or 3-year-old Little boy who thinks he knows everything. Little boys aged 2 to 5 Are very stubborn and self willed and think they know everything As girls who hit the same phase at 9 to 16. Walk in my shoes for one Day with my son acting like he does with me and believe me that is sometimes the Only Way i can get through to him. Since i do have a Small child to Deal with he takes advantage of me when i am out doing my shopping and running around. You pay for a Sitter and i would be Happy to leave him with one. I cannot afford to leave him All the time. So Don t Knock All parents who spank their children because All of us Aren t trying to beat them into submission As you so delicately put it. We Are just using it As a last resort. Name withheld Ober Ursel West Germany responses made to letter concerning civil War Gettysburg a recent letter writer expressed shame and regret for the civil War and the re enactments at Gettysburg. He went on to compare his father s experience at iwo Jima with the horrors of the civil War. He also stated that the War Between the states had neither glory nor he roes. I say nothing could be further from the truth. The civil War is considered to be the first mod Ern War due to the incorporation of such things As rapid fire weaponry trenches the Telegraph and the Railroad into Battle. Ironclad warships rendered the wooden navies of the past obsolete. Indeed the Monitor was the first to boast a revolving Turret. The Strate Gies of Many of the generals in the War . Lee Grant German Johnston Etc were studied worldwide. Gettysburg was the greatest land Battle in the history of the Western hemisphere. In three Days More Ameri cans lost their lives than during the entire monthlong Battle at iwo Jima. In All about 600,000 americans died in the civil War that s More than in All of the other wars combined. The Issue was states rights. The american Rifleman of that Day be he Northern or Southern was the greatest american hero. He was compelled to fight not some faceless foreign Power but his neighbor his brother his father. As for iwo Jima 30,000 . Marines went ashore there on the first Day. When the Battle was Over almost 6,000 americans had died in action almost 100 of them were . Naval personnel involved in support activity offshore and Over 17,000 were wounded. Of the 22,000 or so japanese in Garrison on the Island just Over 200 lived to be taken prisoner by the marines. I do not question the heroism or achievements of the men of the v amphibious corps who fought so valiantly they won a remarkable Victory Over a Crafty and tenacious enemy at a great Cost. Fortunately the majority of them survived the Battle. Staff sgt. Darrell l. Stanley Kaiserslautern West Germany i would like to comment on the letter civil War evokes shame not nostalgia As i am one of those who have spent $1,000 equipping himself. I have been involved in re enacting for Over 15 years and i do not do it for nostalgia. The average re Enactor is interested in history usually in More areas than just the civil War and will agree that the civil War had its share of inhumanity. However like any War it had its heroes and cowards Good men and Vil Lains. Soldiers then like today were in the military for basically the same reasons they believed in a cause they were caught up in the events of the Day it was a career or they were drafted. As a re Enactor and historian i study wars and themen that fought them. This includes How they lived what they wore what they ate How they fought and to the Best of my ability what they were thinking. I have been with groups who have slept in the open and marched Miles in heat and cold with period cloth ing and equipment. I have spent hours at historic Parks and classrooms demonstrating and teaching people what it was like to have been a civil War Soldier and to have lived in that time. Re enacting is not just for men there Are also Many women who re enact the roles of women of the past. Re Enactor display Confederate and other flags not to espouse any political or racist cause but to accurately demonstrate and preserve the knowledge of the civil War to the fullest and Best of our abilities. The writer has attached a greater amount of emotionalism to re enactments than re Enactor do and is using his present perspective to View a historic event without considering the society or the people who lived at that time. If Mathew Brady is the writer s Only expo sure to the civil War then i wish to remind him that a Little bit of knowledge can be possibly Only the subject of religion has More published vol Umes than the civil War. Whatever ideals the writer May attach to the Constitution equal rights and non violence have never meant the same thing to any two different generations of americans. The writer can rest assured that the re Enactor at Gettysburg did not feel shame nor were we in mourning. Education comradeship and Mutual in Terest not Celebration Are the reasons we go to events like Gettysburg. Capt. Howard r. Brandts Ankara Turkey
