European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - September 8, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse Columns 3 ways to teach global geography to americans Knight Ridder newspapers Ami rir.1 May to of Williim the Hind be rest of i he world in some rims bul i cumin try on Earth can Challenge us in the fast growing Hijji i Field of doing studies to prove Hiil americans an stupid. Tin Moil recent study which i m sure you have rend about assuming you l to read Wili done by he geographic society. It showed that Isle Rosof their knowledge of global geography americans rank just i Bull even Wilh Salt. According to Gilbert m. Grosvenor pics Ideal and Chii Irman of the sodomy. 1,1 i americans were Given maps of the world mrs Iskel to rain1 to specific regions Willi the following results 25 Pertl no could a locate the Pacific Ocean s7 percent were Nul sure which Finger they were supposed to Point Wilh 52 portent lost their . I port i t .iff1 0 Wilh ibis statement i May be stupid hut ill least my in t Gilbert frankly i was no sur Jirise by those findings. 1 Don t know Why to should expect americans to be Able Loli Italy the i Ici fic Ocean when .1 Many of i hem i annul locate their air seals. Ask any frequent flier. You got on a plane and inevitably Way ahead of you blocking everybody will to a passenger sending next to raw 12 and frowning Willi intense puzzlement ill a boarding pass that says in Brut letters Seal 12a. And if tar much study this person will ii Down in Soat 14f, Ihus Selling off a plane wide i reaction of people having to Sil in Iho wrong seats anal ultimately forcing you Losili next Olio unaccompanied children on to the exorcism Elc tic. Also Here is Ihu Issue of How americans give directions. Let s say the to a location Are As follows go straight for our blocks. Here s How Many americans will give these directions of. You see this you re just slay on hand Yogi just go straight and let s see you re Gonna come to a rest Aurnel on your right it Scallero Bud House of Good chewing but the sign fell Down in 19b1, i think when the oven imploded ind the Virginia baked Ham came through Llic of font Wall must have been going 20u Miles in hour and destroyed s new Toyota Tercel and put her in ,1 coma which thank goodness she. Came Oul of Fine Oxcell for sometimes when she makes Hiil kind of Barking sound. Or maybe that was 19b2. Anyway you go n she on past that. Then you to Gonna come to. and so on. So Sec should not to surprised that americans Are Only dimly aware of where Vinyl Hing is. The question is. What arc we going to do Aboul ill have been thinking hard about his question almost since the moment i snarled writing this sentence and i be come up Wilh .1 Hoo part program should do the trick t. Put pictures of naked people Back into National geographic. In my youth. National geographic atm famous for pictures of exotic cultures meaning cultures where you could make an entire family s wardrobe from a single pair of suspenders. This kindled a powerful interest in geography among adolescent males. When a now Issue of arrived at the Junior High school Library we d Page through it violently until we found a picture with a caption like this a woman of the Wahonda tribe uses primitive implement to prepare a meal then we d stare at her implements and wonder How to court have had the incredibly bad Luck to be born in what was to judge from be ogre hic the Only culture on Earlh whore women wore clothes. 2. Put major Chain sloops in foreign countries americans Are Superb at mall of geography. Put a blindfolded american in in unfamiliar mall anywhere in the nation and within minutes thai american will locale key landmarks such As soars and the Gap. You put some of these stores in the persian Gulf and by god americans would learn where the persian Gulf was. In the interest of of lefty the stores would have to be clearly marked with signs slating this is not an attacking iranian f-14 3. Make geography less complicated. The vast majority of geography consists of foreign Nal ions which there Are entirely Loo Many of plus Many of them have names such As Yemen. To need to sit Down Wilh these nations and convince them by Means of an eloquent and Well reasoned Appeal involving Tho in real of ill out nuclear attack Hal it would be in their Best interests to clump together into three Oral most four Large countries with names that americans can easily remember such is "thi1 Squarish shaped country coloured Pink on the if you agree Wilh these ideas i urge you to write to the president at the White House District of Columbus Ohio. We need your help. Man should have confined his remarks to business by miss manners United feature Syndicate dear miss manners Afler a meeting 1 it landed in a nearby cily the woman who conducted t invited me and another gentleman to lunch. The lady wore � conservative print dress. Ii was very Windy and it was apparent that she was having in impossible Lime keeping her dress Down while carrying a purse and briefcase. I Iclet sorry for her and decided it was Besl simply not to react. The third member of our party was not so sympathetic. He was quite amused at her Ambaras Smunt and joked with her in a Way which bordered on harassment. During lunch he remarked that hit wife did t Wear a slip either and he even commented about the panty Hose she wore. Should i have offered to carry her briefcase so she could belter hold the folds of her dress or would that have been insulting she was such a Good sport about the whole episode. Am i overreacting gentle Reader ladies Choice now often Means having to choose Between being n Good Sporl and charging sexual harassment. As it is difficult to conduct business while doing the latter a lady s choosing the former does not mean Hal she is Happy with it. Probably she would and miss manners certainly does commend you for your kind attention to her difficult situation. You might have offered to carry her briefcase without showing undue excite mint about the nature of the problem bul ignoring the difficulty was also a polite solution. The Way to end the other person s unsavoury talk would have been to say to him coolly i really Don t think we come Here to discuss mrs. Trefoil s underwear and then immediately to turn to her Wilh a business Quost Ion dear miss manners on a recent trip to Europe my husband occasionally addressed waiters. Porters arid Kose giving assistance As i know he was trying to be helpful Friendly and pleasant bul i feel this is not Correct. Gentle Reader your husband found pole sri where in Europe miss manners would like to Lake her vacation there. I is True sir is the Mode w used Loward the person being served not the one doing the serving. It is More common to resort to the j incorrect usage in America where we have no terms j for designating service people of unknown names i than in Europe where there Are such terms dear miss Mann ers we iut returned from \ the funeral of a close family member. After the Wake we assisted the bereaved in sorting and answering i cards Elc. To our Surprise Many checks were sent. Some were donations la a selected Charity bul most were directly for the bereaved. Several family members said thai the bereaved should keep those i checks1 not made out to the Charity. Correct " gentle Reader you do not say if the survivors were left destitute bul even if Hal were the Case friends should suggest organizing a fund rather than merely sending unsolicited checks. Miss manners believes Hal the contributors intended their checks to be used for the designated Charity. i9bs sni
