European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 3, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Columns americans can t get too angry with Uncle Bob by Dave Barry cosh. The Reagan presidency is almost Over. Almost Lime for the Gipper to head off to the ranch. Heart Irig off la inc  was a a or function tit the i ppr administration. And Why nod you try sitting around the while House thinking about stuff like the Trade imbalance for Days on end especially when you Don t have to. Hey you re the president any Lime you want you can just say the hell wish the Trade imbalance i want logo id the ranch if you do right away a major government Branch of the world s most powerful nation swings Inlo priority action Mode providing you with a Goins away ceremony a Hocti Upter a Jet armed Security people using secret radio frequencies bullers maids. A motorcade and bust of All a staff smart Guys wearing suits who will continue to think about the Trade imbalance far you while you ride your horse. When you re Dom iding those Guys bring you items to sign and approve important items thai appear in the paper like this Santa Barbara Calif. President ref gun Lod by signed an order authorising a measure Hal would reverie a Section of a provision that would eliminate a $3,7 million reduction in the proposed fiscal 1989 budgetary increase for the inter monetary Trade amalgamation administration. In a prepared statement the president said blah blah blah. Of course the prepared statement does 1 actually say blah blah blah but it might As Well. 1 mean do you read those stories neither do 1.1 think we regular citizens lend to be More interested in stories we can grasp the significance of such As did Mike Tyson or did Mike Tyson not throw Robin Civins out their mansion window. Compared with this kind of gripping human drama the activities of the Federal government seem confusing and Remote. We know it s there but we Don t have a lot of direct Contact with in. Except when a postal service employee lakes Lime out from his Busy schedule to sell us Stamps. We lend to be detached from our government. Just like president Reagan. The news Media pointed this nut for years. President  has a detached management style they kept saying because they could t come right out and say what they meant which was president Reagan apparently does not know nor much care what is going on. They were always presenting examples of this. Like the time Reagan turned to Samuel Pierce who was Secretary of housing and Urban development net therefore no question about it a member of the Cabinet and said or. Mayor How a things going in your Ilyf of the Lime he called Princess Diana of Britain Princess david.". Of the time Michael quaver cheerfully acknowledged Hal sure the president sometimes feel asleep during Cabinet meetings. Or the Lime he appeared to be saying this was 16 months lifter he became president that he believed nuclear missiles launched from a submarine could somehow be called Back. Or when he introduced or. And mrs. Sugar Ray Leonard As sugar Ray and mrs.  or All the times he answered questions by launching Inlo anecdotes after which his staff would spend Days trying to figure out exactly what planet these anecdotes had occurred on. Or the astrology thing. Or Iran Centra. The Media reported this and much More and waited for people to react to say hey this Guy can t be the president this Guy needs aides jul to get dressed in the morning but it never happened. Nut in any big Way. It seemed like no matter what Reagan did a whole lot of people still liked him. After a while this seemed positively spooky to the Media who nicknamed Reagan the Teflon president As though his secret were some kind of Slick High tech shield As though if you could tear the shield away and reveal he real Reagan people would be appalled. But i think this theory is just Aboul the opposite of the truth. I think the reason Reagan was so popular was that the shield did t work. No matter How hard his aides tried to make it look As though he was right on top of things he still managed to act kind of out of it and people actually liked it. Hey we Don t know. Who the Secretary of housing and Urban development is either. Cabinet member or nol. It s like we were in an air plane and the Pilot got sick so kindly old Uncle Bob had to Lake the controls. We would t expect a or tue from Uncle Bob. We d consider it a Triumph if he did t crash. We d be Happy for him if he did something Good. Hey Uncle Bob signed an arms control agreement yay for Uncle Bob and we d feel bad for him when things went wrong. Of hot the Marine Barracks got bombed Don t feel bad. Uncle Bob it s not your fault -., it s As though we figure hey nobody can really control the government anyway so we might As Welt have somebody we like. Which is Why the voters were not at All thrilled about the presidential choices this time around those two fussy men those dueling prunes who completely licked the whal me  president Uncle Bob. Some still heed the guidelines about wearing furs by miss manners United feature Syndicate dear miss manners when is the appropriate. Age to Purchase and Wear a fur coast i live in a cold area and i travel a  Deal. I am a College Sophomore and i am aware that there is really no place in my wardrobe or such an item but since i have already purchased one i had to have i need enlightenment on when to Wear it. Centle Reader miss manners was pleasantly startled 16 have anyone ask such i Lasle Ful question she had come to think that the Only gauge of buying furs was whether one had achieved the appropriate income Tot the , miss manners age fur i  the following disclaimers 1. Hardly anyone observes these distinctions. Anymore although miss manners is not the Only old. Fusty around who recognizes them your future mo1her-in-Law, who is out there somewhere watching May Well Cire about them Loo. 2. Furriers will Tell you thai any fur is appropriate at any age any Lime any place. Unfortunately they will now All feel compelled to write and Tell miss manners the same thing because her Way of thinking about this spoils their lunch. I those opposed to the use of furs should note that this info mat Ion concerns social custom it Doe nol Deal with the moral implications. A. Owners of furs who find their Ages do not match their coals Are reminded to remain a bit of humor and perspective. Ditto for people who want furs deemed inappropriate. They should All go Back to item iwo Lor reassurance.1  5. The age err on the lenient Side not the. Conservative. For the really old of Jay version add five years la All figures. Otherwise those who agree with the principle but want to argue about the details had better be prepared to take on not Only miss manners but her aunt Mitzi. 6. Miss manners and her aunt do not wish to hear. About your fun fun since they do not recognize such a term. Nor do they wish to Deal with your Mink sweat shirt. However being no fools they have decided to omit the traditional Dill actions Between what May be worn by a girl and a Young Matron of the same age. A Young lady under 18 May Wear fur trim on a Cioth coat provided in k a fur appropriate id youth. Such furs which May to worn As full Coats from i he Hajje of 18, Are Squirrel Mouton a Muskrat and Raccoon. From 20, she May Wear also Beaver or nutria. At 25, she May add persian Lamb Fox and Seal Mink or spotted furs should nol be worn until after the Awe of 30. One should be Over 35 for Sable or Chinchilla and Over 10 or of Royal blood for Ermine Noble blood is sufficient if ii is merely Ermine trim As a College Sophomore you Are probably Over 18 and under 25, so your coat May Well qualify As just the thing for your age. But of course. It s not As simple As that there Are country furs and City furs. The. Former Are spotted or rougher kinds and the toll rare sleek furs whether Tat or Long haired and also very Pale or Black furs. A Campus  May be is classifier As country for wardrobe purposes you would Wear pants or plaid Skirls Here but not matched suits thus if you have a Raccoon coat for example you could a ear it a school but if you have a Pale or Black sheared Beaver you should keep it for occasions when you Wear Dressy daytime or evening clothes. If you should happen to have purchased a full length Mink Coal or a Chinchilla Cape. Miss manners suggests you Wear in far enough away from your school thai you can pass yourself off As older without anyone giggling of  you dear miss manners will you please describe the Correct Way if there if one to puss already seated listeners in a crowded theater or concert Halll and is there a Correct Way to let others pass you when you Are already in Alcil 1 am always Uncertain whether to stand for example and whether to pass Ace to face or sideways. It seems always my Luck to have scats right in the Middle of a 20-seat Row and i find close Contact with strangers awkward no Nutter How i or others do it i feel Clumsy but i might eel less so knowing that i am squeezing past people correctly. Gentle Reader miss manners is glad that you recognise the distinction Between a Correct Way and a Graceful Way and thai you Are aware of the fact that the latter docs not exist. The Correct Way in this country is la face toward the stage but turn the head toward the approaching seat which enables the passer to say excuse me to each person passed. To be passed one smiles at the passer while gather ing out of the Way any hindrances such As Coats or skirt overhang. Gentlemen should Rise and press Back against their folded seats. Ladies May sit Back and slant their legs to the right.  fobs to Pipit Nugine