European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - December 13, 1988, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Daily Magazine male incest victims just beginning to talk about abuse by Lisa Levitt Hycko an associated Pressa to first. Dan s secret was Small and shameful. Then ii festered and grew and oot on a Limo of ils own tormenting its keeper until in con rolled his every waking hour. One Day Dan s secret became so ugly Ond overwhelming he could no longer contain it. It came out Al last How Dan had been sexually molested by an older brother who climbed into bed with him Al age 9 and kept coming Bach for 10 years. But 63 terrible As it was Dan s secret was Only one piece of a Rulh tar More horrifying. It was like a Pebble tossed in the deep silent Pool thai was his family causing Ever widening Ripples and revelations. Aboul 50 of my relatives have been abused. Al. Least those Are the ones i know  said Dan 23, who asked that his Lull name not be used it gets passed from generation o generation and nobody talks about it and so it never  Dan s oldest brother who had molested Dan had himself been molested by a favorite Uncle a female Cousin had been molested by her father. Dan s Mother had been molested by a male relative. Other cousins had Boon molested by their siblings or other relatives. Dan was not alone As a male survivor of incest in. His own family and he is not alone in the United states. A 19b5 los Angeles times Survey found thai one of every 15 adult males reported having been sexually abused before the age of 18. An estimate of 15 million abused men is conservative said therapist Mike Lew who works with mate survivors of incest Al his next step counselling and training Center in Newton mass., outside Boston. Thai does t include men who Don t remember the abuse that does t include men who at this Point Aren t Able to talk Aboul it yet who we in Linro too ashamed or too frightened said Lew author of victims no longer a Book about recovery for male incest survivors. It s Lusi beginning to be Sale enough to talk Aboul in. Women were the first to talk about incestuous abuse partly because it is easier Tor society to accept the idea of women As victims Lew said. Men Aren t supposed o be victims Fie said. Won arc supposed to be Able to handle everything to be Strong to be dominant. We Don t know what to do Wilh a Man or boy who s been victimized we either define him As something Bihar than a Man or something lass than a Man or we deny the reality of the  Hank Estrada s personal denial lasted 25 years until the Day he discovered thai the same Uncle who had abused him for 12 years also had tried to molest one of Hank s nephews. I got this Nephew to Tell me what had  said Estrada 32, to Eta that i had to share my own experience which was very difficult. But i did t want him logo through what i  has staler the boy s Mother reported the Uncle to the authorities but because the abuse had merely been attempted and because it was the boy s word against the uncles no charges were filed. Estrada Laid his own Story of abuse which began stage 4 and tasted until he was 16, but the statute of limitations had run out. I was a blatant denial by the system to let this Man go Estrada said. They re just wailing for him to do it  when Estrada Wen looking for support services for himself to Chow i was not the evil one for bringing aft this out he found none the Only services available were Lor perpetrators. Two years ago he started plea Lor prevention leadership. Education and assistance a los Angeles based group thai others support and information to adult male survivors of abuse who Are not abusers themselves. A common misconception is thai men who Are sexually abused As children always become perpetrators themselves Lew said. In fact Many male incest survivors become protectors of other people. Dan for example works with the retarded. Many of the men who come Lor Hempy come when they be become parents or when their children reach the age they were at when Thoy were abused Lew said. They come in determined that this is not going to happen to their children they be heard the mythology that men who have been abused automatically become child abusers and they warn1 to make sure they won t abuse  for Many abused men the idea of victimizing someone else is horrifying. They know Tir thend the terror guilt and pain of being a victim. They know How an abuser who is often someone a Billle boy mosts trusts and loves father Mother brother or Uncle can turn those emotions against the victim tilling him with Gull and Selmo Athing. Dan tried to commit suicide twice. He used food As an escape in his Sophomore Yeav of High school he weighed 310 pounds. The biggest reason i ate so much was hoping i could become ugly to turn my brother Olf so he would t touch me Dan said it did t work. It just added to my  at 19, the abuse had become Loo much. I could t stand the feeling of guilt of shame of Haling myself for what was going on. I knew ii had to Stop and i was the Only one to Slop in Dan said. I got a gun illegally and Kepi it in my nightstand and i swore if he touched1 me. I would kill  Dan has Ince told his parents about what happened and has confronted his brother who denies having a problem. Estrada s Uncle now in his 60s, still lives with his relatives and has Access to dozens of children. ". Thai makes in imperative for mate incest survivors to Tell their stories Estrada believes. Unless society knows that boys Loo can be incest victims it always will be difficult for future victims to summon the courage to Tell anyone about what is happening to them. Break the silence break the Cycle of abuse. Most of the men who Call and write me say i always though i was alone they re in so much pain themselves they never thought about Hel abuser doing it again to someone else Estrada said. Ii May have happened to you and it s in the past. But ii does t Stop there.". For help and information in the United Stales. Plea 213-863-4824. ". V National child abuse hotline 1-8do-4224453., National resource Center on child sexual abuse1-800-kids-ooe.-.". The Cost of firearm injuries  Lewin new York times n juries caused by firearms Vtha United slates Cost an estimated $429 million a year in Hospital expenses. Alone and b5.spercenl of that is borne by taxpayers according to epidemiologists at the University of California Al san Francisco. The three researchers reporting in the nov. 25issueof the journal of the american medical association said the Cost would be Mote than is billion if expenses such As ambulance services doctors fees follow up care and rehabilitation were included. And again they said taxpayers would pay most of in. The study by or Michael j. Martin or. Thomas k. Hunt and or. Stephen b. Hulley. Was based on the experience of 131 patients admitted to san Francisco general Hospital Wilh firearm injuries in 19s4, because san Francisco ambulance Drivers Are required to take All gunshot victims in the cily to that Hospital the researchers were Able to extrapolate the san Francisco figures to ones Tor the country As a whole. To san Francisco the Hospital costs of the gunshot victims ranged from $559 to $64,470. With an average of $6,915, and the average length  was 6,2 Days. The patients themselves paid for Only 1.4 percent of their Hospital costs while government sources paid 85 6 percent the researchers Sard. Private sources such As insurance companies or health maintenance organizations paid the rest., firearm injuries Are an important Public health and economic problem and we. Ought to Start looking Al them that Way. Martin the Lead researcher said in Telephone interview. People tend to shrug the Issue Oft saying that handgun control is a matter of individual rights he said. Sut it s tote taxpayers who Are paying the costs and if. We Are paving we should have some say Over the Public policy on firearms. If you compare us to other countries like Japan or even Canada it s crazy an wrong How Many firearms and firearm. Injuries our solely tolerates Martin said. The interview coordinator of the National Rifle association in Washington said that the Only two people in the organization author led to comment on the san Francisco study were travelling and were unavailable for questions in Martin s study handguns were responsible for 81,3 percent of the injuries in which the weapon was specified about 57 percent of the total. Eighty seven percent of those shot were male 46 percent were Black and 77 percent were 20 to 39 years of age. Ii you took Al who gets shot you find that it s generally indigent inner City people who Don t have insurance or. Martin said. I think that explains Why the. Government ends up paying 85 percent of the Cost of firearm injury  but Only s3 percent of the coals of ail Hospital rations in the United slates. The san Francisco study showed that -. California a medically India no adult. Program paid 30.4 percent of the. Hospitalization costs of the gunshot victims while medi Cal the state medicaid program,paid23.3percent. Medicare paid 4.9 percent the jail system paid 7.5 percent and a victims witnesses and assistance program paid 0.9 percent. In addition the Hospital absorbed 18.2 percent of the costs different Stales have different programs said Martin but one Way or another no matter what state you look at you d find that most of the Cost was coming from the taxpayers  extrapolating from the san Francisco data is researchers estimated that in the United states 62,075 people were hospitalized for gunshot wounds in 1984. Tuesday december 13, 1988 the stars and stripes Page 13