European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - September 19, 1989, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Tuesday september 19,1989 the  stripes Page 11 Anh Landers dear Ann Landers this is a response to a Cincin Nati jitters the woman who be came engaged to the sex husband of a close Friend. During lunch with the sex wire she was told that the Man was sadistic and had been extremely cruel to her. Take it from someone who has been there run As fast As you can in the opposite direction. 1 married a Man who beat up his first wife. She warned me not to marry him. Thanked her for her concern and assured her that he loved me a lot and even though he had hit me a few times marriage would change him. Shortly after we married the beatings began. We split up and got Back together so Many times that i lost count. Every time he came Back he promised to get counselling go to Church and work on controlling his temper. Well he never went to Church he did not get counselling and the violence continued. Finally i filed for a Legal separation and a restraining order. That made him so angry he Al most killed me. A woman who stays in a relationship where there i violence loses her self respect self Confidence friends family Pride and everything of value. 1 am now trying to rebuild my life and gel my act together. The physical scars have healed but the emotional scars will be with me for the rest of my life. Please Ann keep telling women who Are in abusive relationships to get out and stay out. Promises from an abuser mean nothing. These women need to get professional help. It saved my life. Diane in the Delta dear Diane thanks for the testimony. No one can make a Point As Well is someone who a. Been there. Dear readers i Don t know about you but i am ready for a Good laugh. Here it is from the Benton to county enter prise. Politicking speaking in a Parish where half the voters were Cath Olic and half were Baptist gov. Earl Long of Louisiana began by saying that the most pleasant times of his youth were on sunday mornings when he would hitch pair of horses to a Wagon and drive his grandmother and Grandfather to the Catholic Church. Alter the serv ice was Over Uncle Earl continued he would return Home Hook up a fresh team and drive his other grand Mother and Grandfather to the Baptist Church. After the speech Long s aide came up to him and said governor i did t know you had a Catholic Grandfather and  Uncle Earl replied hell we did t even have a  dear Ann Landers what is your opinion of a couple that hosts a dinner party and allows their dog to Greet the guests at the door with a bark and a jump the hound was Loose the entire evening swishing his Tail in the hours d oeuvres on the cocktail table and Sam pling the tiny hamburgers and Franks. When the meal was served the dog was under the table begging for scraps and sniffing the guests i realize that it is in american not to be crazy about dogs so i did t dare make my feelings known but i do believe that these people should have boarded their pet at the vet s for the evening or at least have locked him up in the Back bedroom. Am t wrong outvoted in a. Mcarva unless a Pel is extremely Well behaved he should not be let Loose when guests Are present this position will not be popular with a majority of my readers but i m willing to Lake my lumps. Letters Reader describes trashing of Berlin area Welcome to the Berlin Community we have lived Here for less than 18 months and know full Well the hopelessness a recent writer from our Community is feeling. The answer she got from it. Col.  concerning measures against vandalism was according to the regulations but unfortunately those legs Are not effective. How Many people must one Collar be fore the whole Community knows not to trespass onto a la cd Oft area we at this time feel hopeless. There is nothing that the legs can do and at the same time there is nothing that a handful of caring people can do to keep the Many that Don t care in Check. In our building we have Mold coming in from the out Side because the insulation is no longer there and the mortar is decaying. A memorial to poor construction our tax dollars at work. We have grass around our building where people Don t Cut Comers mainly around the other end of the building. Smalt wonder that we never expect to Sec any cleanup awards. We have trash and Glass my word do we have trash and Glass not just from the 30 to 40 children that live in our building but from the adults who Are too Busy to take out their own trash so they Send the children to the dump Ster. The children can t reach the dumpsters or Haven t been taught to get the trash and Glass inside so it gets left on the ground. Those big ugly crows have a heyday and toss it All Over. That s just the dumpster area we have trash and Glassell Over no matter How much we try to pick it up wherever we go we Don t leave without a Bagwe Are Over whelmed. We Are also too Busy to continue to pick up trash and Glass every Day Only to return the next Day and find the area littered again. Vandalism it is always or. Nobody brother of i. Dunno and Cousin of the infamous Weron t. Me. We clean the writing off our building we paint and scrub scrub and paint. We lost our bus Stop because All the Glass windows were broken within a week of replacement. Don t ask us Why or. Nobody basically leaves the Ger Man transportation bus stops alone and just does his dirty deeds to the american stops. We Haven t seen or. No body doing his thing but mrs. . Not involved has. We try to sleep through our hopelessness but no one sleeps in our Community. Or. Nobody is having a big blow of a party and must play his music so loudly that the guards in the towers Over by the Wall Are rocking and rolling. If someone complains that the music is too loud then the party goers gel even louder screaming abuses and throwing Beer bottles off balconies. Don t get us started about the inconsiderate slobs who spill laundry detergent from their apartment or storage area All the Way to and All Over the washers and dryers and believe that it is not their Job to clean up after . No my Job Waits for stairwell cleaners to come or for the stuff to plaster itself All Over the stairs which Ever comes first and now to our favorite subject. Skateboarders last summer they were looking for a place to have some fun. Everyone ran them off. Finally the maps told these poor Fellows to build their ramps and have their fun in the Tennis courts right next door to our wonderful building. At first we thought to run these Guys off. They were just too noisy. Then we thought better. Since the Tennis courts were not being maintained we could allow them to maintain and use these courts. Besides the maps were behind the idea of keeping them off the streets and run Ning Little old ladies Down. It worked the Guys borrowed our brooms and the trash and Glass in and around the Tennis courts was getting cleaned up at least weekly. We were doing great we even volunteered to Call for assistance should anyone get Hurt by using a special signal on the outside door Buzzer to our apartment. Soon the season Drew near for Days to replace the Tennis nets. Of fellas let s get you some recognition for your hard work and get the Days to recognize and Sanction your activities. The Guys took nearly 300 id card holding signatures to the Days. They claimed that this area was now Deh s area of responsibility. Deh inspectors came out during the school work week and took pictures of the area and said that the equipment was unsafe it would be removed. Goodbye skateboarders and goodbye Welt maintained area. Within the week the place was a garbage dump again. We become Active in helping others while helping ourselves and we get a slap in the face despite our encumbrances and realizing that there is no Utopia we like Berlin. We want to stay Here Longe than the usual three years. Berlin is full of things to do and see full of memories not Only our own. The shop Ping is lots of fun and the German people Are All that you Ever imagined and then some now if we could just get rid of the americans who arc too Busy too Lazy or just Plain out for Numero Uno. It is a hopeless situation our country is on a downhill spin to Complete destruction no matter who we blame what we blame or How we blame. We would t have believed it if someone had told us that the americans Over seas at least in Berlin Are a blemish a big zit on the face of our country. Small wonder so Many countries hate us All name withheld Berlin editor s note i. Col. Barry l. Allison Community executive officer is. Military Community Ber Lin replies the Berlin military Community is very much concerned that our housing areas Are maintained to High standards. As i am sure you already know we rely on individual occupants stairwell coordinators building coordinators and area coordinators to resolve Many of the concerns you mention. This is the Community Chain of command use it involvement in your Community is the key. I am re minded of the Story of when Gen. George c. Marshall moved into quarters one at fort Benning a. The general saw that most of the quarters in the area including his own were in an ill state of repair. The general did not Issue any cleanup orders but rather obtained paint and began painting and cleaning up his own quart ers. Soon his neighbors were doing likewise. Before Long the entire Post had followed the general s example. In closing i would like to thank you for your continued involvement in maintaining the Berlin Community. Let me also add that when individuals Are identified As being responsible for vandalism or Are constant Viola tors of noise discipline in stairwells they will be asked to vacate government quarters. Pen pals please 1st me in your pen pal column. I am 29 years of. My hobbies include English soccer photography music walking camping and  Ransom rowans 3 Sunset Park 126 Ringwood Road. Is. Ives. Ringwood Hampshire. England bh24 2nt please list me in your pen Pat column. I am 22 years old. My interests include drama. Mrs and travel Samanth jones73a, Myers Road West Crosby Liverpool. L23 or England i am 13 years old and i would a to have pen pals. My hobbies Are swimming and listening to  Wiff iams bvc.3/20fx Box 408 aponawyortt09165 ones Riande Lopes european edition cot Oene e. Townsend Usan commander editor m chief it col Suzanne a Phillips Usan Saputy commander editor in chief Marie Kominicki Mert Proctor Deane b. Moe Mott production manager managing editor circulation manager this newspaper is an authorized unofficial publication Tor members of the military services overseas. Contents of the stars and stripes Are not necessarily the official views of or endorsed by the . Government the department of defense or the . European command. The appearance of advertising in this publication. Including inserts or supplements does not constitute endorsement by the department of de. Rinse or the stars and stripes of me products or services advertised. 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