European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - February 14, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse Page 14 Ann Landers the stars and stripes dear Ann Landers i have been Reading your column for Well Over 20 years first in the Philadelphia inquirer then the Toledo Blade and now in the Sacramento Bee. A the Best column you Ever wrote was the twelve rules for a Happy marriage i Cut it out and sent copies to each of my six married grandchildren. I then made extra copies for the three grandchildren who Arentt married yet but will be one Day. I wish you would run it again Ann. Your audience changes every few years and if some folks remember it so what sometimes people have to see so Nething a few times before it soaks in. Thanks for All the arguments you be settled and the fights you be prevented. Sign me your no. 1 fan in California dear no. 1what a Day brightener. Here Are the twelve rules for a Happy marriage a and on Valentine s Day to Boot. How s that for perfect timing twelve rules for a Happy marriage 1. Never both be angry at once. 2. Never yell at each other unless the houses on fire. 3. Yield to the wishes of the other As an exercise in self discipline if you can t think of a better reason. 4. If you have a Cloice Between making yourself or your mate look Good a choose your mate. 5. If you feel you must criticize do up lovingly. 6. Never bring up a mistake of the past. 7. Neglect the whole world rather than each other. 8. Never let the Day end without saying at least one complimentary thing to your life partner. 9. Never meet without an affectionate greeting. Dear Abby dear a up what better Day to revive my ten commandments of love yes i actually had the chutzpah to write my own ten commandments a but that was More than 20 years ago when 1 was younger and knew everything. Originally i had written two sets of commandments one for men and one for women. Then an Early feminist from Milwaukee wrote demanding Equality for women insisting there should be one set of commandments for both genders. So How is this for a gender Bender Quot the ten commandments of love thou shall put thy mate before thy Mother thy father thy son. And thy daughter for thy mate is thy lifelong companion. A a a \ it a Quot a abuse not thy body with excessive food tobacco or drink that thy Days May be Many and healthful in the presence of thy loved ones. A Quot permit neither the business nor thy Hobby to make of thee a stranger to thy children for the most precious gift a Parent liveth his or her family is time. Forget not the virtue of cleanliness. Make not thy mate a beggar but willingly share with thy mate thy wordly goods. Forget not to say a i love foremen though thy love May be constant thy mate doth yearn to hear those words. Remember that the approval of thy mate is Worth More than the admiring glances of a Hundred strangers so quibble thursday february 14,1991 10. When you be made a mistake talk it out and ask for forgiveness. A 11. Remember it takes two to make an argument. The one who is wrong is the one who will be doing most of the talking. 12. Never go to bed mad. Dear Ann Landers three years ago our son was born with flaming red hair. His older Sisters hair is dark Brown like my husbands and mine but several members on both sides of the family Are redheads. We Are aware the Gene that produces red hair color is a recessive one which Means it can skip a generation or two. When Billy arrived with a a Ahjit flaming Crown of glory we were not surprised. So what a the problem i can to go anywhere with this kid without attracting a lot of attention and being asked the same Dun a questions. A where did he get that hair a a is your husband a redhead a a does he have a temper a in be considered having a to shirt made for him with the message a yes i know my hair is red. Now please leave me a any suggestions on How to Deal with this seeing red in Tennessee dear seeing red a a 7 a a a a. You Are not going to change the Public s reaction to Billy s red hair so you d better change your attitude because Billy is sure to attract attention for a Long time. Of course it s Boring and bothers one but please try to be pleasant and patient. When you respond in an angry and combative Way you teach your child to do the same and this will not help him in life. C creators Syndicate a a letters to Ann Landers May be addressed in care of the stars and stripes. Apo new York 09211. And they will be forwarded to her. Cleave unto thy mate and forsake All others. Keep thy Home in Good repair for out of it cometh the Joys of old age. Forgive with Grace. For who among us does not need to be forgiven Honor the lord thy god All the Days of thy life and thy children will Rise up and Call thee blessed. Dear Abby in be been dating a Man for nearly two years. He has never been married and i am a widow. He earns about one and a half times the salary i make. Our financial obligations Are about even. In be Given him several Small gifts for no special season except i wanted to please him. 1 have had him Over to my House for Nice dinners quite often. He keeps telling me How much he enjoys Home cooking. He has taken me to dinner occasionally but he says he does no to enjoy eating out much. When my birthday rolled around 1 discovered he a did no to a enjoy birthdays either. 1 did no to even get a card. 1 finally told him i thought he was cheap and he reminded me that he had installed washers on a Leaky spigot in my Kitchen. He does no to enjoy movies but he enjoys television. There Are so few things this Man enjoys i wonder what a wrong with him. 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