European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - February 16, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse Ann Landers dear Ann Landers. A i agree with your advice to a not proud of myself in i too had an affair with a married Man. Tor whom i broke up my marriage and almost lost Niv child. That affair lasted five years to it of which i spent in therapy and three in support groups. A i could Analyse a my Lover and myself but the details Don t matter. The important part is that i was unhappy with myself but i did no to know it was about me so i went looking for something or someone to hang it on. A Zack Quot made me feel loved desired an special Quot but it was like dope. I could never get enough it worked less and less and was costly. I broke up with Zack last year and my therapy is really paying off. I function belter at work at Home and is a Friend. It s not magic. Its very difficult not to is Cape into that blaming pattern. My child has stopped behaving in a destructive Way since a Learned to be an adult and a . A do a a a a did it Hurt to give up Zack you bet if did but not As much As staying in a hopeless relationship the old Story he leave his wife because she was ill etc., Etc do i miss him yes Bui 1 know i la live through it Ami ill be a better stronger person when i heal. What hurls the most is How i deceived myself. Zack was t a bad Arian he was just too damaged emotionally to make a real relationship work.1 i began to turn the Corner after i read a a Ponien who love too much when you keep wishing and hoping hell change a by Robin not Wood. The second half of the title is the real tip off. I had a if Only _ he would Hll tribe Blank even thing would be he and Al would t. The Only person 1 can change is due. A a. V a v Quot. A to qty child my sex husband my sex Lover s Wile and dear dear Abby some Lime ago you had a poem in your column about Hunters who shoot wild geese. It described How the male Lay dying and his wounded mate stayed with him and covered hint with her broken Wing until she died. This really impressed me and cd like to show it to someone who is very dear to me and thinks killing Birds for sport is of. A Edith p. Reed lady Lake Fla. Dear Edith i remember it Well. It was written by Lemuel t. Ward of Crisfield md., and Here it is Hunter s poem a Hunter shot Aba flock of geese that flew within his reach. Two were stopped in their rapid flight and fell on the Sandy Nale Bird Lay at the Waters Edge and tie died he faintly called to his wounded mate and she dragged herself to his Side. Ashe Bent her head and crooned to hinting a Way distressed and wild i caressing her one and Only mate t y As a Mother would a child. A then covering him with her broken w ing and gasping with failing breath. She Laid her head against his breast a saturday. February 16, 1991 the stars and stripes today a crossword Page 19 or. V. Children Ami Alf family,-members.wluvwer.e Hurt by the breakup of my marriage Law Ovid say pm sorry Vou Lead to pay sue heavy Price for part of my growing up. I m sorry your lives got screwed up by my emotional Quot immaturity. Living the rest of my life intelligently is lire Only atonement i can make and Hope it will . Recovering in Arizona dear Arizona a a /. A. Your letter is about twice As Long As the ones 1 usually print but it is Well Worth the space. Thank you Tot being honest. In a sure a great Many women saw themselves today and Learned something. Dear Ann recently mentioned the Singer pm a a Pierce in your column and Nii spelled his name. It is Pecten. He started in Brooklyn As a Cantor Singer of liturgical music in the synagogue and then went into Ope la he persuaded Bis Bug her in Law Richard Tucker. Who was a a also a Cantor to go into opera it is obvious miss Landers that you Are not of the orthodox persuasion. Some time ago your column., stated that memorial prayers i kor Are recited on the High holidays. I kor is said four times a year. As former resident of now Lla Waji 1. Hoped have enlightened a 1 . Dear . A a _ you Are right Jon All counts 1 did indeed misspell Jan a name and appreciate your correction. I wonder Hiwa pm airy copy editors around the world caught in and no i am not orthodox. 1 was brought up in the conservative tradition and later switched to the reformed. ,. A a a c creators Syndicate. A. A a a a \ a Lav a feeble honk. Then death. This Story is True though crudely told 1 was the Man in this Case. 1 stood knee deep in Snow and cold and the hot tears burned my face 1 buried the Birds in the Sand where they wrapped in my Hunting coat and threw my gun and Belt in the Bay when 1 crossed in the open boat. Hunters will Call me a right poor sport. And scoff at the thing i did. A. But that Day something broke in my heart and shoot again god forbid dear Abby. In a married to a terrific Man. He s Good looking with a terrific build caring does t drink or Chase around with other women hard working and in tact fairly wealthy he makes an upper Middle Elas income. My problem is that 1 just Don t feel like i love him. Although i do care deeply for him pm just not Quot in love with him. Should i stay with him just because its such a Good arrangement or should i leave him to tied someone who go Verne that a in love feeling love starved dear love starved it All depends on what you have going for you. As my sainted grandmother used to say �?odpn�?T4 throw away cake to Start looking for crumbs a a a a. C Universal press Syndicate quibble. A. 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