European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - May 11, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Like Mother like daughter by Leslie dreyf0us associated press m a i or. Robert a. Lee my policy advisor replies when investigating an Accident maps gather information and make a determination As to the cause of the Accident. Tickets Are not Given out automatically at every Accident. A but in this Case the my determined the facts indicated that your wife was driving at a Speed too fast for Road conditions. The my should have informed your wife of the determination and Given her a copy of the ticket. J other sees daughter sees Mother like the image in a fun House Mirror their perceptions Are sometimes distorted and Ever changing inexplicably close then Miles apart pleased and pained at once. 1. Mathers and daughters have always clasped hands across a generational Gulf. But that expanse has perhaps never been wider or More arduous to Cross. A a Quot no two generations in history have Ever been As estranged As the 50 to 80-Yearold Mother and her 20-to 50-year-old daughter Quot said Victoria Secunda author of r when you and your Mother can t be friends a mothers reared during the depress Loiland world War ii were presented Clear Cut roles. Their lives were generally defined by spouses and children their dreams often deferred 1 How different Are the lives led by their baby Boom children products of Post War Freedom and plenty these a Are the daughters of feminism and consciousness raising the heirs of wider Choice and its unfolding consequences. A Quot what we Are living is really a revolution and there s Mutual confusion Quot said Evelyn Bassoff author of the new Book mothering ourselves help and Healing for adult daughters. Quot there s fear and a helpless kind of frustration because most mothers and daughters want to be there readers action lineman maps Issue tickets without notification i would like to relate an incident that happened to my wife that could happen to others. Last Winter while driving to work at less than 20 Mph my wife hit a Patch of Black ice the car spun 180 degrees jumped a sidewalk and lightly struck a Stone building. The Accident caused very minor damage to our car. Quot Amy wife called the maps who responded and acted very professionally. When i arrived the m is were finishing up their report. My wife made a statement at no time did the maps Tell my wife that they were giving her a tic r Tif a a about a month later i received a letter from the a commandant s Headquarters about the  a enclosed was a ticket for Quot Speed in excess of conditions and my wife was assessed five Points v my wife had no trial no Chance to defend herself no. Innocent until proven guilty. What happened to the american system of Justice i guess the maps write the tickets and find you guilty Over Here without a trial. It i called the commandants office and they said people a Are Given tickets and Points All the time Tor accidents i Quot caused by Black ice. They agreed this was unfair but said there was nothing they could do. A. If you have an Accident because of ice you can t see. You re going to get a ticket regardless of How carefully you re driving i thought the maps would be there to1 help us. I thought my wife would receive fair treatment for a traumatic event. I was wrong. It Jeff Weber to a 1 Kaiserslautern Germany a amps Sharon Kilday for each other Quot Bassoff said from Bounder Colo. Quot they just Don t know . The rules have changed As have the expectations Between Mother and daughter whether searching for ways to harmonize career and family or forging a life on their own younger women Are making new demands. But mothers can no longer bind All their daughters wounds or offer simple recipes for Success. It s an uncomfortable reality for this older generation of women Many of them devoted homemakers who had All the maps do not furnish facts concerning the Accident to the Driver s suspending authority in this Case an officer in your Chain of command. The suspending officer undoubtedly reviewed All the information including your wife s statement concerning the Accident. If there had a been any doubt in the suspending authority a mind that a the facts did not support the charges then he or she could have dismissed the charges and no Points would have been assessed. Apparently the suspending. Authority made the decision that the Accident was i caused by your wife a driving at a Speed in excess for the conditions. A / once that decision was reached the suspending a authority was required by Usa eur regulation190-1 to assess five Points since the Point system is strictly administrative and not judicial in nature there is no requirement for a hearing. However if your wife wishes to Appeal the suspending authority a decision she has the right to go to the revoking authority who is a Field Grade officer above the suspending authority then on to the appellate authority who is at a minimum a colonel above the revoking authority. So even though there is no trial there is a system in place to Grant your wife her Day in court. Someone in the commandant s office gave you some incorrect information if they said the system was unfair and nothing could be done _ _ if you have any questions about the information i have provided you should Contact your local Provost marshal and the suspending authority. You May also Contact me at ets 380-8126/6354. A Mai. Bruce e. Lewis jr., chief Public affairs he 316th air div Safe replies a when military or Security police officers investigate a traffic Accident they make an assessment of the facts available to them upon their arrival at the scene of the Accident. There Are occasion when All of the facts May not be available to them to make on the spot determination of fault  vehicle operators taken to the Hospital witnesses or other individuals relevant to the Accident Are not on the scene Etc a additionally an on scene investigation May not automatically result in a traffic citation being issued at the scene. The report filed by the police officer undergoes an extensive review process to ensure it was properly completed. / in this Case a citation was not issued at the scene but answers to childhood questions. A to at the same time Many older women have finally emptied their nests after decades of mothering. They re ready to Start planning travel study or a new career. But the Telephone keeps ringing. Its that worldly Independent career woman on the line bending a Mommy s ear and often soliciting career counsel or relationship advice Marie Burnett a new Yor psychologist specializing in women a a sips Calls it an emancipation disorder. Because they re not marrying right out of College women Are relying longer on mothers  a. Quot this is a generation of Young women doing very. Courageous stuff. They be graduated College left Home without partners and taken High pressure jobs in the. A a. A a City Quot Burnett  a they re emancipated Quot she said Quot but out of fear -. Many women Are clinging to their mothers. The Telephone has become a new sort of umbilical Cord f unfortunately therapists say Many daughters find the. Well  pained by their daughters confusion a mothers Are often either exhausted or limited by.  life experience. Quot it also can be incredibly painful Quot said Secunda 51, who is currently working on a Book about fathers and daughters Quot we were raised to believe that we should go to College find an eligible Guy and get married a end of Story Quot and along comes this daughter who can have Money. Travel a sexual life outside of marriage. The Mother unconsciously takes a look at the daughter and sees the choices she did t have. And the hardest thing for them to do is say a i blew it. Can we discuss it Quot 1 some mothers instead Retreat emotionally others dismissively offer snap advice still others might bemoan their daughter s lot the head spinning choices and. Attendant confusion. Quot but that s not helpful Quot said Florence Kaslow a therapist in West Palm Beach Fla. Quot the True Challenge is finding Mutual acceptance. Saying to each other take a look at my world and learn with me Quot 1the possibility of your wife having travelled at a Speed 1excessive for the icy Road conditions was discussed  by the police officer on the scene. When the police -. Officer returned with the report it was determined that a traffic citation was warranted for the situation. Therefore a cilia tips was drawn up and forwarded to the unit for review and action if deemed appropriate. After processing All traffic Accident reports Are submitted to the individual s unit for review and action by the appropriate command element. It is that respective commanders obligation As the revoking or suspending it authority for the unit to determine whether or not the subject  the report is guilty or not guilty of committing the violation. A Quot if the commander determines that person to be at fault a then he or she May assess the appropriate number of traffic Points against the individual s driving record. If the commander feels there is. Insufficient evidence to. Determine guilt the report and citation is returned to the 7 appropriate police Agency with a Quot not guilty Quot finding and no action Point assessment is taken against the t individual involved. T ,. Military and security., police agencies merely report the facts of an incident , they do not take action against , nor do they assess _ a punishment. That is the responsibility of the comit Iander. If an individual disagrees with a traffic citation he or a she has the right to rebut the citation. When submitting the rebuttal the individual should relate the events surrounding the incident and include the reason s Why the citation should be voided. The rebuttal process should be started at the unit level and then forwarded a through appropriate channels to the responsible police a Agency. To write us. Readers action line is threaders Quot court of last resort Quot striving to answer some of the questions a about life overseas in a military environment or _ quest bus about policies and guidelines when other avenues for answers Are not readily available. If you have a question and Don t know where to turn for the answer write to readers action line co the stars and stripes Apo 092114211. All letters must be. Si9ned, and preference will be Given to those seeking information of general interest to our readers