European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - September 18, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Wednesday september 18, 1991 the stars and stripes a Page 19 Ann Landers dear Ann Landers someone very dear to us is married to a Man who refuses to grow up. He is old enough to be president of a company but the most important thing in his life is not his wife his children or his Job. It is his bicycle. Seven years ago this couple moved to a warm climate so a emr. Bicycle could train year round. While there he had three Bike wrecks that resulted in a broken Collarbone a fractured knee and Many cracked ribs. Because of his injuries he Hasni to worked for two years and has landed in bankruptcy court. They Are now living with our friends parents. Although a mrs. Bicycle is working two jobs their income is still Low enough so that they Are eligible for food Stamps. Or. Bicycle is still not employed which Isnit surprising because he has never been enthusiastic about working. He quit a Good Job last year after four Days because he said it did t pay enough. The real reason is that the Job Cut into his six hour a Day training schedule. This Man is no idiot. He has a College degree and other professional certifications. It seems that he lacks the great american work ethic and there is always someone around to Rescue him a mainly his wife. Disgusted and dumbfounded dear d and d mrs. Bicycle should look in the dictionary for the today s crossword dear Abby dear Abby i am 32 years old and people say i am very attractive. A year ago i started seeing  he was everything i Ever wanted a handsome intelligent successful. We were together almost every night and he even started talking about marriage. Then last month out of the Blue he announced that he thinks we re getting a too serious and we should both Start seeing other people. That was the beginning of the end. Its like a bad dream. I can to Stop crying. In a in sales and my Job requires my full attention but in a in a fog. My eating is out of control. The night before last i ate a whole Barbecue Chicken a Large pizza and three cheese vanishes. Tonight i consumed a pint of ice Cream and almost a whole bag of cookies. My stomach Hurt so badly i  finish the cookies. Abby i dial his phone number 15 to 20 times a Day just to hear his voice a then i hang up. In a sure he knows its me. In a humiliated he would dump me like this. How can i get him Back i love him. Out of control in los Angeles dear out of control you May not be Able to get him Back but you must regain control of your feelings and behaviour. What you describe Isnit a love a its compulsive behaviour. Or. Susan Forward has written a Book for people who can to let go of relationships that Arentt working or have ended and find themselves feeling out of control. Its titled obsessive love Bantam. Pick up a copy and word  that a her. She should then get some counselling and decide whether she wants to spend the rest of her life like this maybe she does. The decision should be hers so stay out of it. Dear Ann Landers i have been dating the same Guy for eight years. Two years ago he gave me a Diamond ring and we decided to get married. While making our wedding plans we suddenly came face to face with the financial realities of life and decided to wait until we had enough Money to buy a Little House. Our relationship is going Well. The Only problem is my parents. They get upset whenever my Fiance and 1 go out of town together. I have told them that we sleep in separate Beds but that in t enough. My Mother gives me these Long winded lectures about How it Isnit right since we Are not married. Ann i m 25 years old and Haven to lived with my parents since i was 18. D.s., Greensboro . Dear Greensboro a 25-year-old woman who has not lived at Home since she was 18 and is engaged to a Man with whom she has been going for eight years should not be discussing her sleeping arrangements with her Mother or anyone else. Keep your lip zipped. Should anyone bring up the subject of your sex life simply say a that topic is not one i want to talk  c creators Syndicate read it. It will help you shift from pain and anxiety to healthy patterns of Healing and recovery. Good Luck. Dear Abby i am the Man who found the $42 in the Glove compartment of the secondhand car i had recently purchased. And i am married to a woman of Good character in Anchorage Alaska. Here is the rest of the Story since pocketing the $42, i have put that much and More into this vehicle after replacing the brakes and a computer part and being towed twice. I find i am now $550 in the Hole a minus the $42. Rabbi Botnick related the parable about the rabbi whose students had bought him a Donkey to help him in his business of Selling flax. The students were amazed to find a precious Pearl attached to the neck of the Donkey whereupon they informed the rabbi that he could retire a a Rich Man. The rabbi responded �?o1 bought a Donkey not a Pearl a and he promptly returned the Pearl. I have to wonder if the Pearl would have been returned if the Donkey had come up lame the next Day. I expect your response will be similar to my wife so that the car trouble May have been a consequence of my action. I done to buy that a and in a not returning the Money. The husband of the woman of Good character dear husband Only a fool would buy a Donkey without carefully examining it to make sure it Wasny to lame. And Only a fool would buy a secondhand car without having it examined first by an automotive Mechanic. 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