European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - January 18, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse Ann Landers dear Ann Landers i m another one who never thought i would write to you but a letter in your column struck a chord in my heart. In a referring to the woman whose husband is unemployed and whose friends have forgotten them. So much of what she said can be applied to us. My beloved husband who is Only 46, is terminally ill. He has been battling cancer for almost a year and unless we have a Miracle he won t live much longer. Id like to use your column to speak to our friends and family members who have disappeared into the Woodwork. Dear friends and family where Are you do you know How lonely we Are you were All there in the beginning when the Shock was so great a and you gave us strength to get through it. You did no to know what to say but you came anyway and just sat with us and cried with us and let us know you cared. That was almost a year ago. Where have you been since do you know How we Long to hear the phone ring to see a car in the driveway or a card in the mail you done to have to stay Long. In fact its probably Best if you done to. But right now we feel As if we be been abandoned. We done to have the plague. Cancer is not contagious and our emotional needs Are almost As great As my husbands physical needs. The thing is i know you la be there at his funeral to say How sorry you arc and offer to help. And then you la disappear again. And when that happens you la wish that you a called More or tried to visit More often but it will be too late. Thanks Ann. I know there Are Many others who will see themselves in my letter. This happens often to cancer patients and their families. I done to want to leave you with the impression that we have no one around to dear Abby dear Abby i am a 17-year-old girl who has been baby sitting for nearly five years. Ever since i started baby sitting in be been nervous because i done to know exactly what the parents expect from me. For example i arrive at a Home to baby sit and the parents Are waiting at the door for me and Are All ready to leave the minute i get there so i can task them any questions. I see that the House is a mess a sometimes there Are dishes in the sink and there Are baskets of laundry that need folding. Anyway after i get the kids bathed and in their Beds i have plenty of time to straighten the House and i know where everything belongs so Why i do it i could even do the ironing. This really bothers me Abby. I always put the children a toys and clothes where they belong but How about the rest of the House i have a Girlfriend who also baby sits and she says she gets paid extra for picking up the place. Should i offer to do More than just baby sit and should i be paid extra if i do baffled baby Sitter dear baffled when you Are asked to baby sit suggest that you Are saturday january 18, 1992 love and care for us. There has been a nucleus of people who have been faithful from the beginning and without them and god we could not have come this far. But so Many others who we believed really eared have simply fallen by the Wayside. Just sign me hurting in Suburbia dear hurting i realize you Are going through a very difficult time and my heart aches for you. Thank the Good lord for that a nucleus of people who have been faithful from the a great Many folks Don t have that kind of support. Good Luck and god bless. Dear Ann Landers awhile ago you had a column about How motorists can die in seven tenths of a second when they re in an Accident and Arentt wearing seat belts. Well that column stuck with me for a while but i kept forgetting to buckle up. Last june i stopped procrastinating and purchased a buckle up training unit from a California company. In 30 Days i got into the habit of using my seat Belt. In november i was in a head on collision. I was travelling at about 40 Niph when a truck with a Drunken Driver turned in front of me and totalled my Bow. The Bottom line is that because of your article and this training unit i am still alive and suffered Only soft tissue damage. I spent the night at Home instead of in the Hospital. My husband and i want to thank you for writing that lifesaving column and i Hope a lot More people will make it a habit to buckle up. Alive and Well in Bakersfield Calif. Dear a. And a what a terrific Day brightener thanks for letting me know. Are you paying attention readers c creators Syndicate also capable of cleaning the Kitchen ironing and doing other household chores after the baby is asleep and if you do household chores you should be paid accordingly. So Don t feel guilty asking for a reasonable compensation. Dear Abby if you print this please do not use my name my City or state a just get my message across so another woman will be spared the disappointment i just experienced. I was married two years ago in a picture Book perfect Church wedding. All who attended said it was the most Beautiful wedding they had Ever seen. I wore a designers wedding gown that Cost $2,400. It was Satin and beautifully beaded. When a very close Friend of mine announced her engagement she asked if she could Wear my wedding gown and i said yes. Abby i have never regretted a decision More than that one. I gave it to her in perfect condition a and it was returned to me in such a sorry state i cried. I am crying As i write this Abby but i am determined to get this message across to other brides if you value your wedding gown done to let anyone Wear it. 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