European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - October 21, 1977, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Page 18 the stars and stripes Friday october 21, 1977 new York the pay loader coughed when the operator started it in the fail morn ing. The front of it Rose and slapped Down onto the Mound of rubble. Only a walk away straight up the Cross Street up the Hill to the grand concourse and then Down the other Side was Yankee stadium where people fought to pay Money to  men play a world series baseball game. Here on Fox Street nothing of such vast importance occurs until late in the week when the assistance checks arrive. Therefore the few people out on Fox Street yesterday settled for a place in the emptiness from which the machine could be observed. The Man operating the pay loader Tony de Carlo Felt that regal hand of the White House had put him to work. Last week Jimmy Carter toured part of the South Bronx. Fox Street radiating particular devastation was part of the route. Suddenly the House wreck ers Union was called upon to Knock Down the building at 881 Fox Street. The Structure seems to be particularly dangerous and somebody in municipal government decided that it would be rather poor taste for the build ing to collapse and perhaps crush a child or two so soon after the president s visit. When i walked into the empty lot yesterday morning the operator Decarlo began waving and trying to shout Over the noise of his machine. Then Decarlo stopped the machine and climbed off it. Don t you  the Wall he said. He walked us through the rubble staying Well away from the five Story Brick Wall of the gutted building. We reached a Point where you noticed that the Wall was not joined to the gonzo is nothing Thompson explains Boulder Colo. A what does gonzo mean a student in the University of Colorado audience asked writer Hunter Thompson who uses the term to describe his Brand of journalism. It Means people like you asking me questions like that. It was a Good word i liked at the time said Thompson. But what does it mean nothing he said. Building. See that Decarlo asked. The Wall is freestanding. The whole rest of the building is burned out. God forbid kids should play Here and there s a  Decarlo is Short and Chunky with a slight Goatee. He wore a yellow rain Slicker and tinted glasses. What Are you doing Here he asked. I Don t know. I started for Yankee stadium but i got out Here i said. Well there s nothing Here unless the Wall Falls Down he said. You know what i do sometimes in the Day Here i give a kid a ride on the machine. I gave one a ride i make his Day. It s All the kid s got. I do something for the kids Home anything and they re unhappy. Here you give him one ride and you changed the whole Day for him. To him that s a big thing and that s  we walked Back through the rubble to the sidewalk. I want to ask you something he said. What does it bother you when you come to this place it does i said. I feel guilty when i go Home he said. I live in Lynbrook. I get Home i feel something wrong. I mean Lynbrook compared to Here. When i leave Here i drive Over the Whitestone Bridge. You come Down into Queens geez it s Shangrila. That bothers me. It bothers you too yes it does i said. I thought it was just me he said. No you re just smart enough to say it i said. Keeping out garbage one of the labourers came through the lot from the next Block. You  what we got to do to keep garbage trucks from using this a dump he said. He pointed to Walls of rubble that lined the sidewalk. We Burn pm up you know build up the height so you can t get a truck Over the Hill Decarlo said. Other Wise at night every carting company comes around Here and dumps their garbage  leave the least Little space they live right in and empty a whole garbage truck the labourer said. And this is where people got to live de Carlo said. Damn Jungle the labourer said. He looked at my notebook. You won t put the labourer s name Down will you go ahead put it Down. Put my name  what s your name Johnny  Decarlo walked us to the car. On the other Side of the Street a Man and woman sat on chairs on the platform of what had once been a show window for a store but now was just an open space on a Street that was a homicide victim. Decarlo slapped the top of the car. Ill  you. I m glad i talked to you. Here i thought it was just  Fox Street and All the other streets of the poor in the City become an emotion As you walk on them. As the people come out of the Rotten buildings even the faces of the children have defeat in them. It takes somebody who has not been taught to deny what his soul tells him somebody like a heavy equipment opera Tor to discuss the thing properly. South Bronx Downer i first went to the South Bronx to write Sto Ries in 1959. Every time i came Back from the place i was Down. Then last week again after watching Carter drive on Fox Street and then hanging around the area for a couple of hours i came Back downtown to the Middle of Man Hattan and everything seemed wrong. Here were two men in blazers walking with a woman a striking woman a woman with huge glasses atop her head and an expensive fall plaid coat thrown Over her shoulders and they turned into a famous restaurant called the Palm on second Avenue. I could t even watch them walk in. Don t they know does t anybody know at night i went to a place called the Laurent with polished Wood and carpet and a Man at the table was talking about putting out a movie for $12 million i Felt disoriented that i should t be there but i said nothing because this is something one simply does not discuss with another. Unless you happen to be As real As Tony Decarlo who operated a pay loader on Fox Street yesterday. Yesterday the car drove onto the Bridge and out of the South Bronx. It headed for mid town Manhattan along the East River drive. Water was on the left the backs of the great townhouses of Sutton place on the right the most splendid City scenery in the world and it bothered you. At lunchtime in the deepest gloom of a rooftop Garden that overlooked fifth Avenue a Man in an expensive pin Stripe suit said he supposed everybody would be going up to  the world series in Yankee stadium which is in the Bronx but not on Fox Street. C new York news Chicago Tribune across 1 English architect 5 distress signal8 to Box 12 Pierce with a Horn 13 pack 14 ancient Irish capital 15 Summit 16 in Malaga 17 Shade Trees 18 fend off20 a flight less Bird 22 father Brown s creator 26 . Asian Peninsula 29 atmosphere comb form 30 Witt 31 across Uganda vip 31  30 across 32 paltry 33 bit or piece 34 Stool Pigeon 35 unpleasant 3f tuscan City 37 former French Nobles 40 rave 41 take turns 45 russian Mountain Range 47 word with ache Orwig 49 Luzon natives 50 French novelist 51 greek letter 52 Norse goddess of destiny 53 merited Reward 54 patriotic org. 55 fencing sword Down 1 seaweed product 2 narcotic 3 greek Mars 4 native of Acapulco 5 Ray like fish 6 Energy source 7 beginner 8 guide avg. Solution time 25 min. Mara  g asses sods Al  answer to yesterday s panic. 9 having Royal privileges 10 Supply weapons 11 ethiopian Prince 19 timid 21 pronoun 23arabia 24 supreme Norse deity 25 Asiatic Palm 26 grape refuse 27 Oriental nurse 28 educated 32 wavers 33chapel 35 prohibit 31 theater sign 38 sound 39 mistake42 on the Summit 43 allowance for waste 44 hireling 45 City on the Danube a european Deer 48 exclamation today s crossword 10-21 a Georann Landers dear Ann Landers what does it mean when a Guy smiles and winks at you last week i was sitting on the curb watching a Parade and a member of the Michigan band great looking Guy looked straight at me gave me a big smile and winked. He was not More than a foot away from me at the time. I will be 16 next month and this dude looked like he was about 17. I will probably never  him again but i would still like to know what a smile and a Wink mens. It might happen again and i want to be informed. My heart missed a beat dear beat generally speaking a Wink Means i dig you or i like what i ." but not always. Nelson Rockefeller had a bit of a nervous tic and he winked and smiled a lot. Many women were very much flattered by this and i m sure a few misunderstood. So Don t assume anything dear unless the dude follows up the smile and the Wink with some meaningful conversation it just might be a tic. Dear Ann this is a suicide note and if your reaction to Sui cide is the same As most people s you have probably already stopped Reading. In Case you Haven to i would like to Tell you what is bugging me. I am a 25-year-old male who desperately wants to be married. My problem is that i have never had a Date in my life. I have tried every possible tactic but apparently women find me Dull and unattractive. I have received polite refusals Nasty turn Downs been laughed at insulted and ridiculed. I be watched my friends get married others Are out having fun and i must accept the fact that something must be radically wrong with me and i will have to continue a life alone. I know you will suggest coun seling but i Don t  How it can help. The problem is that i am ugly awkward out of step self conscious and uncomfortable with myself and everyone is uncomfortable with me. I would rather die than live my whole life alone forever. This is my last message to a world that views me As a creep. No name no City but i be got counterparts All Over dear Friend your letter was a cry for help As most suicide notes and attempts Are. I feel sure you Are still around and hopefully you will  this reply. Hie problem is not that you re ugly awkward out of step Etc. It s that you  yourself that Way. Your poor self image has kept you Down All your life and it s time you put a Stop to it. Just scan the society pages and look at the people who Are getting married every Day. Are the men All handsome Are the girls All Beautiful you must get some counselling and find out Why you have such a Rock Bottom opinion of yourself. Once you Start to like yourself better you will find that others will like you too. I urge you to get into therapy. It will be the Best investment of both time and Money you have Ever made in your life. And please drop a line to let me know you saw my reply and that you re going to give it atry. C 1977 Field Enterprise inc