European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - January 29, 1978, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Provides patients a View of i a vicious Cycle of depression be says seeks to control water pain by narcotics and adjuvant you have to remember that not All patients have half of them go through the whole vurness with no pain at of says is hospices Bereave not Stop with the death of the we to visit the families require assistance Mure the psychological suffering caused by the first year after bereavement there is an in Tine Rabuiti to reflected in a 40 percent 6 the mortality rate of other Conse a nude increased reactive de Tod Lon term detrimental effects to children Jon of a pour bereaved people youre the Only me or youre the Only person i can the often they review the terminal live Many questions about it should he have p Hospital or should he have stayed Home if lib had been made would he have been i should have forced him to go to the ground was broken for a Mil building on a six acre site in suburban bran i that very special building is completed next fee of new Haven will the budget will Tail Len and Fulland will Rise i about the Volunteer staff is expected to still emphasize Home using the backup for families unable to care for the for patients who require constant the of will Bouse an outpatient clinic for Home it Loyin Chan designed the building after study and interviews with dying we functional severity of a it stresses brightness and might be afraid of plus thing As a death in instead we this is full of Hare they Are at the end of their be 1978 helping children Cope with death by Marc Wilson associated press Danny often had been in trouble at school and occasionally with the he was 14 when his father and when he visited the funeral Home he tucked a note in the casket in sorry Roger was 6 when he walked into the room where his father had just had a fatal heart his Mother screamed for Roger to go to the neighbors for but Roger  Roger later told his older daddy died because i  do psychologists say the guilt like Rogers and Dannys is common among the More than 3 million americans under 22 who have lost one or both the scars can last a death i very often not explained properly to sol a Schul of Chicago bar Harris prevention Center for the study of separation and loss during death probably even More than sex is something Many parents dont want to face with in his facing psychologist Robert Kavanaugh i wonder if our efforts to spare Little people a harsh reality Are not our own badly disguised struggle to avoid the trauma in telling them about our hesitation allows time and Opportunity for them to concoct weird fantasies that May affect their lifelong attitudes toward for John is a 40yearold professional living in he was 4 when his father committed my older brother was my younger brother John weve All had unhappy marriages that ended in i theres probably some connection to my fathers i Haven forgotten 1 still have his suicide John said he and his Brothers we rent allowed to attend i in death has been a taboo subject with too Many especially when talking to the funeral or nobody told us what was happen All i knew was that my Mother was always in the bedroom my mind is a Blank about his death after All i have Are my mourning is a psychological Way of adjusting to the loss of a loved experts say children Are often and wrongly discouraged from the surviving Parent usually is so perplexed and overwhelmed with grief that he or she cant explain the death to the says Roberta of grief groups in quite often the result is that the child becomes unable or afraid to Ever love again so they dont marry or form close re such problems can be avoided if death is explained to the child when the Parent in her Book the final stage of Psychia Trist Elisabeth Kubler Ross we routinely shelter children from death and thinking we Are protect ing them from but it is Clear that we do them a Dis service by depriving them of the one Case referred to the bar Harris Center involved an 8yearold boy who wanted to stay Home from school after his fathers he was hostile to his 2yearold sister and hated to be away from his the Mother feared he would suffer More if the fathers death was but Counselor told her that the boys reactions were Normal and encouraged her to be supportive and honest during his mourning be honest with Altschul they must confront answer All their ques but dont Burden them with More than they death has been a taboo subject with too Many especially when there talking to Joseph bar Harris administrative direct says children Over 3 should attend funerals and Buri als and other religious ceremonies involving the dead our religious rituals Are important to the including the holidays Are a special the first Christmas without a Mother or father is very children react to death depending on under age children experience death As a change in the Palombo the child has not achieved his own identity yet and May see the death of a Parent As the loss of a part of Between Ages 4 and children generally begin to have a greater sexual Palombo a boy whose father Dies loses a role a boy losing his Mother loses a car taking sixio8yearolds May be the most they feel the loss but they dont have the skills to Cope with the guilt or responsibility they May eight to 10yearolds dont like to talk about they divert themselves by keeping Palombo were not sure what this they seem to handle death better but they May be worse off later Palombo says children Over 10 Arent included in the among other because puberty brings on a whole new set of children of the same sex As the Parent who died often fear to identify with the a boy who loses his father Doest want to think that he too can the boy could also very Likely fear reach ing the age at which his father died we be following the children weve dealt with Over the next 15 or 25 he some of the Chil Dren received intensive but most did not we mostly told the surviving Parent How to help their Chil Dren there really int very much known about this sub and maybe our followup will help us determine How children can Best be what we will look at Are the milestones in a persons people who lose a Parent in childhood often have difficulty finishing they dont graduate from they dont get they dont have they can become emotional but an understanding of of of living without a loved one can enhance says psychologist the main purpose in openly discussing death with children is to enable them to live More the stars and stripes Page 13