European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - July 24, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse                                July 1985 the stars and stripes Page 11 Annan letter dear Ann Landers i have seen myself in your column Many i am one of those men who hit their she never had to go to the but Ive Given her Many Black bruises and Loose i dont know Why i hit my wife when i lost my maybe it is because i saw my father hit my Mother All the years i was growing up and got the idea it is of to behave like my wife and i sought the help of a psychotherapist to help tame the monster in it worked for a but i sensed some thing was wrong when the hitting didst and the Counselor continued to devote most of the hour to coaching my wife on How to avoid irritating she kept it is Normal for peo ple to become she failed to Point out that what i had been doing was we Are separated after three years of i am praying that my wife will come Back and give me another not for More of the but for a mutually respectful i am going to a different Counselor and my eyes have been opened As to whose responsibility it is to handle this i would not want my wife to come Back unless i was sure i could treat her she has been through enough hell i want to say a word to the women out there whose husbands Are abusing get counselling at if he Doest my wife took too much for too in Oregon dear Oregon thank you for a letter that took a lot of courage to you sound sincere and i Hope your wife will give you another you sound As if you Are in control of yourself and that she no longer need worry about her dear Ann Landers last night my husband and i and our two children under 6 years of age had dinner at a Nice we Are accustomed to going to eating places that charge Hal Price for childrens when we asked the waitress if they would extend the same she we dont do that we ended up paying full Price for the childrens most of which they left on their the food want All that knowing that millions of people Are starving to death in other parts of the i get sick when i see food thrown do you think we were treated fairly your opinion is dear Tyler hunger in the world is heartbreaking to be but it has nothing to do with the policy of some offer Chil Drens portions for others do you should have checked before you went if there is no such it is possible to order one portion for two there is nothing wrong with asking for a Doggie bag to take Home this is done in the most elegant restau and no one should feel embarrassed about fallen Blue Angel personified tradition of Navy reminder this was written upon the occasion of the death of a Mike who was killed july 13 while flying with the navys flight demonstration the Blue he was one of the finest men i Ever i was privileged to know and in being Able to Call him my together we shared a love for naval aviation that penetrated to the very Depths of Pur souls yet his was the greater it was in his blood his father had died wearing the Golden wings of a naval aviator when Mike was a Little Mike was the Type of Man of which this world has produced All too dedicated to our country and conscious of the tremendous legacy of courage and skill bequeathed us by those Navy fliers who had gone be he dedicated himself completely to be coming the Best naval officer and Pilot he could and he was the one sensed this from the every although he was just an aviation officer candidate when i first met i knew then that he was a Man in whom the very essence of our naval heritage sharing the Pensacola experience with him heightened its importance for me until like saw As the culmination of my entire existence that Day on which i would at last Wear Navy that we received our wings on the same Day somehow made it the More special for me no ones congratulations and hand shake meant As i sit Here Halfway around the overlooking the Rhine my innermost some advice for alcohol abusers Many of us have friends who on Occa Sions will drink their fill and then last night was a prime i went out with a couple of Guys i was stationed stateside both of them had had a few drinks before we went but one of them had let the alcohol monster work his Complete influence All Over he was embarrassingly angry and ready to Start a fight with every one he came into Contact with and cursing everyone it was not Long before he began to harass me into a while attending one particularly very Nice disco my Friend went ordered walked drank it and then tossed the Glass very leisurely into the Middle of the a few minutes later he went Back ordered yet another came Back out Side and repeated his earlier this time it was one of those Large Beer Stop and what difference does it make As to the size of the the spot in which he broke them or the restaurant or theatre if he begins to let the alcohol completely take control of him the Point is this the Type of behaviour we have to look Forward to every time we go out with friends like this when you mention to them that they May have a possible dependency upon alcohol or the need to Cut Back on a few drinks the answers Are always the same i dont drink that mind your own Busi hey i gotta get Loose before we go to that not an answer but a very naive the pressures and Powers hate should make Over consumption of alcohol a less glamorous activity to participate in to a the added responsibilities of being in the military should Only double ones restrictions for indulging in alcohol and the further social need i be the one to say something that been said a thousand times by a thousand company battalion and Bri Gade commanders alike theres no place for alcohol in our military its going to be sold and consumed at our Many Post clubs and liquor if a Little common respect and mature judgment would be used on the part of the buyer As Well As the retail sales then maybe a curbing Atti tude would begin to and that a of course each military installation has its own policies and regulations regarding alcohol and alcohol some of these policies Are strict in regards to disciplinary actions and rehabilitation facilities that can offer positive support and Post lets mention a few places where my Friend and others like him can seek further if the person is the pastor of the Post Chapel can help immensely with counselling you and your a doctor can specifically with the physical problem and refer you to a specialist if the alcohol info alcoholics Anonymous and finally the alcohol and drug abuse prevention and control pro Grams that Are located right on Post All offer very valuable and positive counselling and if need referral serv All aimed at helping the abuser to recognize his accepting it and getting on the Road to sound to Magazine articles and newspaper stories wont change drink ing the results and possible recovery is a hard the key is persistence and extending a hand of encouragement and this is something All of us can Benefit from my Friend even More 4 Ralph Mitchell Germany spirits Are once again in the cockpits of the phantoms and Star fighters that Streak across the clouded somehow it is not possible that he is gone that his gloved hand will never in the company of the worlds guide an air plane to its but i know How much flying Navy air planes meant to him and should his Fate have been foretold to i know he  have changed a i look Back fondly on those Days almost 10 years ago when three Young thrown together in the frenzied tumult of naval air shared a vision of unlimited Possi now two of those Young men have Only memories of their experiences in naval the third reached the Pinnacle of his chosen and now is we shall have no new memories of our shared experiences will fade with the Pas Sage of time until they Are Mere flickers of a flame which once burned with unquenchable intensity for us there can be no question of his life hav ing been in vain for As Short As his life and regardless of the piercing sorrow that his sudden death has released in we can find Consolation in the fact somewhere out there is a boy who has seen the flight of those glistening sky Hawks silhouetted against the vivid afternoon and this with upturned has resolved then and there that for him life will have but one one goal that of becoming a Navy and hell make it i know it and in certain that somehow Mike knows and  have had it any other Turner Lindsey Germany the All letters to the editor must contain the full printed name and address of the writer and must be we do not read unsigned but we will withhold your name on request and protect your All letters Are subject to european edition capt Dale us editor in chief cmdr Jeffrey us Deputy editor in chief Blackwell m Proctor Mcdermott production manager managing circulation manager this newspaper is an authorized unofficial publication for members of the military services contents of the stars and stripes Are not necessarily the official views or endorsed the the department of defense or the european the appearance of advertising in this including 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