European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - November 28, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Page 14 the stars and stripes thursday. November 28, 1985 column today s crossword memories of an sex first gentleman by Russell Baker the following is an excerpt from the Best Selling Memoir first but never a gentleman to be published in the Spring of 1998. I had dreaded the Summit conference Ever since Jill Glossy the White House photo Opportunity director made the president order me to attend. The press ran vicious stories about my reluctance to go of course. The worst came from Sam Donaldson the grand old Man of to journalism. Millions saw that snide show in which Sam used old film to argue that the first gentleman was afraid there was Loo much crepe under his Chin and too Many Moth holes in his wardrobe to Bear comparison with the soviet Boss s stunning wife Grushenko Mcl Odenko. As first gentleman i was used to being compared unfavourably. By the time of the Baltimore Summit re member. I had been compared by the Media with Nancy Reagan and pronounced Loo Paunchy with Rosalynn Carter and pronounced too dumb with belly Ford and pronounced too vulgar and with Pat Nixon and pronounced too disloyal this last referred to the time the cameras caught me sleeping on the stage during Bulah s televised debate with Percsi Donl Bush. Or was in president Cuomo i never pretended to be Able to keep these people sorted out and Beulah knew i could t when she asked if i minded if she ran for president. Baby i said you do anything you want to and i la be with you 1,000 percent bul Don t expect me to keep those politicians sorted  Well that particular Summit Wax held in Baltimore. Everybody had grown sick and tired of Geneva especially the russians who said they were fed up eating those bread crumbs dipped in melted cheese and could t everybody Summit in up for a change someplace where the seafood was Good. So it was Baltimore. Thai s Why i dreaded the Summit. Now i have to confess. The Campaign biography they published said i was from California where i d been a fanatic surfer with Beautiful Sun bleached hair when i was Young. This was not True. It was written to help Beulah win the vote of the aging californians who of course have been just about the Only voters left in California Ever since families went out of style out there. The truth is i come from Southwest Baltimore in a neighbourhood which used to be called  there Are still people who remember me there from the Days we used to meet at the saloons while buying a bucket of Beer for grandparents too stiff to get out of the House. Speaking of a bucket of Beer that s exactly what i wished i had to dump on that cookie Pusher Beulah Calls a Secretary of state when he said i d have to invite Grushenko to Tea in Druid Hill Park and then go to Tea with her next Day at Edgar Allan Poe s House where the soviet delegation was being put up. That s when i really blew my stack. If my old Balti More friends saw me serving Tea they d never Slop sneering. We used to have a word for Tea drinkers in my part of town but it would be beneath the dignity of a former first gentleman to mention it. What s worse was Gru Shunka being russian because a lot of my old friends were of polish and lithuanian extraction and did t like russians. Even a russian like Grush Colca the perennial Winner of the women s Wear daily award for the most Beautiful expensively dressed woman Ever to provide Light feature copy in the continuing Story of the terrifying East West struggle. Well everybody knows the upshot. The papers at the time made it sound pretty sensational. 1 just want to get the real Story on the record. I also want to answer the three questions everybody has asked me since then. First of All no Grushenko did not like baseball even after i told her that the russians said they had invented the game. Russians could never invent anything so Dull As this contest Between Birds and socks she said. It is capitalist  second no Grushenko did not refuse to accompany me into a Baltimore club because the Kab told her a striptease dancer was performing inside. What they told her was that the Price of Beer was outrageous. Finally yes Grushenko loved the crab cakes on the waterfront. So much better than that monotonous Tea you vulgar Paunchy capitalist hedonist she said. Did you know crabs were invented in Russia cd new York time Denver Daws eager for soviet trip by he associated press soviet music buffs could hear Singer John Denver or trumpeter Miles Davis and american dance fans could gel a Chance once again to watch the Bolshoi Ballet under agreement signed in Geneva by the United states and the soviet Union that reinstated cultural accords that were severed when soviet troops invaded Afghanistan in 1979. Before then american audiences had been treated to the Bolshoi. The Moiseyev Folk Ballet inc Moscow chamber quartet and other russian artists and the soviets had been Given glimpses of american Art such As Singer . King the Paul Taylor dance company the pulitzer prize winning Broadway play the Gin game and Holiday on ice. The cultural Accord was among the accomplishments of a Summit thai yielded Little in the Way of arms control. A joint statement released by president Reagan and soviet Leader Mikhail Gorbachev said they believe there should be greater understanding among our peo Ples and that to this end they will encourage greater travel and pc pc to people  the Accord allows at least 10 individual performers and 10 performing arts groups from each nation to give Public concerts in the other country Over the next three years. Denver who travelled privately to the soviet Union earlier this year and Davis have already approached the . Information Agency about making the trip according to a Usia official. After Reagan said in a nov. 14 speech to the nation thai a cultural Exchange would allow Ovici citizens to see american plays and hear groups like the Beach boys that Rock group said it might be interested. The soviets embarrassed by defecting artists in the past sought . Guarantees that it would return any defectors. This is something the soviets wanted but did t get the Usia official said. In 1979, Bolshoi dancers Alexander Godunov and Leonid and Valyntina Kozlov defected and the soviets subsequently cancelled trips to the United states by several performers. Each country will Send travelling exhibits to Lour the other. The last such american exhibits on photography and agriculture toured the soviet Union in the late 1970s. The Accord also expands academic and educational exchanges specifically allowing 15 Fulbright scholars and 40 Usia researchers to travel to the Soviel Union. The two nations agreed to create a joint scholarship program for students in natural science social sciences Nuin Anilia and technology and to promote russian Lan Guage studies in the United slates and the study of English in the soviet Union. A parallel agreement provides for general exchanges to promote understanding of aspects of each country s life and  among those to be included in the exchanges Are ath letes arts groups professors print and broadcast journalists and Library exhibits As Well As Federal state and local government officials. The first .-sovict Exchange agreement was signed in 1958 and the exchanges continued until 1979 when presi Dent Carter refused to renew the Accord after the soviets invaded Afghanistan. An estimated 115,000 soviet troops till occupy the country. By   across 1 diet entry4zeus s spouse 8 Swift horse 12 the works 13 Orchid s Kin 14 fios dancing 16 kid s card Kame 17 tied up 18 actress Zadora 19 Johnson s predecessor 21 turn Down 24 unite 25 in the manner of26 relatives 28 old to parts32 opt 34 pea place 36 Castle sur rminder37 bet accepter 3� one Dwarf 41ergs42 decay 44 shred Down 46 Quick 1" Hoot looks film 60 Indian z Wing ruler 3 Pancake 51 crippled 4com 52 tuna Type Mander 68 track 5 period shape 6 Haystack 57 spare 7 crooked 68 half a  be done dance 9 wander 69 food fish 10 Uke 60 proof some Reading cheeses Nuu a 11 gaunt 61 code sex 18 dessert plan Atlon Choice ask. Elation time 29 Man 11-28 ans. To yesterday s Puzzle 20 take in 21 enthralled 22 ugh Salias 23 gratuity 27 show assent 28 shoehorn s counter part 30 roof overhang 31 asterisk33 cob clangers 35 Morse e 38 mythic Bird 40 Wall to Wall item 43 exams 45 mahal 46 gooey mass47vesuvuui Low 48 Amo Amat 49 revue part Wrath 4 Guevara 55 arthurian Knight 11-28 Hubert Hubert / for heavens Sake. Pinner t f