European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - January 30, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse Columns bargain basement deals could save America by John Windrow staff Volu Miil i have been Down in the grumps about the National Debl. The exact figure does t Spring technically wed to another should 1 Call the party by some other name should i for heaven s Sake not give a parly at All the last seems a bit mean spirited. But one wishes after All to do the right thing. Gentle Reader miss manners seems to recall an Edith Wharton Story in which a husband who thought his marriage was just Fine happened to notice that his wife was wearing another Man s engagement ring so the situation is not All that new. However civilized people recognize that a married person cannot be engaged. It was one thing Lor your Friend to inform you that she intends to marry but it would be quite another for her or you to indulge in the customs and trappings of an engagement. The right thing ii to give your Shower Between the Young Man s divorce and the wedding. Thai period even if it is Only an hour is the time of engagement. Dear miss manners please explain the protocol of Candy dishes on office desks especially a receptionist s desk. If she does t offer May i Lake gentle Reader if the Candy dish is on the receptionist s Side of the desk it May be her lunch if in is on the visitor s Side it is for visitors. Generally however some sort of comment is offered in order to acknowledge this. If the receptionist does not say have a Jelly bean the visitor May prompt this of Jelly Beans to which the receptionist will say have dear miss manners my dear grandmother has always cooked an elegant Christmas dinner with lobster Newburg As the main course for the entire family. During the last one i was sealed next to my aunt and across from my father. After a particularly Willy remark my aunt who had some lobster in her Mouth laughed and accidentally spat 4i few particles in my direction. My aunt and my father saw it but the rest of the table luckily failed to notice. My reaction was a slight laugh and smile and then a Quick wipe with my Napkin to remove a particle from my Cheek and tie. My aunt and i laughed again and did our Best to forget what had happened. As soon As we were on our Way Home my father asked did you have to make such a big Deal about aunt Martha spitting inc food an your face he was hard put to give me a belter Way to read but argued that my actions served Only to Embarrass her Sunnee fully. Miss manners i am not � Sloppy eater. The thought of continuing Wilh my dinner and engaging in lighthearted conversation with some of the main course hanging on my Cheek makes my stomach turn. Others might have noticed and reached the wrong conclusion that i had consumed one Loo Many glasses of wine also my aunt is in her mid-305 and aware of her action f she were older and less Alert or had poorer vision perhaps i could have remedied the situation without her noticing. Was it improper to make Light of the situation does it sound As if i made a scene neither my Mother nor my brother knew what had happened or was my father being unreasonable what should my aunt have done Centle Reader nobody is suggesting that you sit there with a lobster hanging on your face. Your father s and your methods of handling this arc both Correct. In his you would say nothing and wipe your face inconspicuously. Had your aunt been unaware of her action that would have been the better. But miss manners actually prefers your reaction in this Case. You did t spread the knowledge to other diners and you succeeded in malting your aunt laugh about it. When it works that is a better catharsis for embarrassment than silent toleration. Feeling incorrect address your etiquette questions to miss manners in care of the stars Jno stripes Apo 092ti . Forces. January 30,1936 Tripet Magazine
