European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - March 3, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Page 18 the stars and stripes monday March 3, 1986 advice from the pothole Man by Eugene Sheffer by Art Buchwald the pothole Man is Happy to report that the mail Box has been overflowing with letters. Thanks to a cold and wet Winter potholes Are now flowering in neighbor hoods that have never seen them before. Unfortunately there is still a lot of ignorance about the care and feeding of potholes but that s where i come in. Our first letter is from Laurie Kramer who writes i have a Beautiful pothole in front of my House measuring about two feet in circumference and 18 inches deep. What would you advise me to Plant in it dear Laurie what you Plant in your pothole depends on whether you want to use it for show or eat from it. Since i assume it will be run Over at least 200 times a Day i would Plant something Low to the ground such As petunias for show or Dwarf Pear Trees for food. Make sure you have a Good drainage system in your pothole or it will fill with water and become a Breeding ground for malaria mosquitoes. The second letter from Connie Coppersmith asks us to discuss pothole ownership. We bought a Home last month with an Art Deco pothole that the previous owner insisted was at least 50 years old she writes. Actually we bought the House for the Hole. Now it turns out we do not own the pothole the City does. Can we still fertilize it and treat it As our own dear Connie it is interesting that the City would claim ownership of a pothole on your Street. Municipal authorities when called not Only deny they own the pothole but attempt to prove your Street is not even within the City limits. Consider the Street Hole your own. This letter from Joey Fontana deals with fixing up potholes my Hobby is finding run Down potholes in the neighbourhood and improving them so they look almost Brand new. I drive a Cement truck so i think i do As Good a Job As anyone. The other Day at Cathedral and 44th Street i made beaut i mean a greyhound bus could disappear in it and never be heard from again. Well this Guy Charlie Guggenheim who owns a House right there said i was getting too close to his personal pothole. He told me to fill mine in or take it somewhere else. I m not taking it anywhere. Am i right dear Joey you certainly Are. Guggenheim should be pleased with having your pothole in front of his House. If he had any class he d fill it up with humus and Plant some Tulip bulbs. Recently the courts have ruled that a pothole belongs to All the people. Our founding fathers wanted America s potholes to be shared by everyone from sea to shining sea. By enlarging and widening the pothole in front of Guggenheim s House you enhanced All the real estate values in the area. Dana Williams wrote this interesting letter there was this pothole at the end of the Block and it kept getting larger and larger. Every time a car went Ker plunk an Axle broke. Then one Day a neighbor planted a Bush in it so people could see it. The following Friday for no reason at All the Bush caught on fire and burned. The next morning a City repair truck came by and filled in the Hole. Was the burning Bush a Miracle dear Dana i m not sure about the burning Bush but the City truck showing up to repair the pothole sure As Heck was. C los Angeles times too Many Flowers ruin the bouquet by James Kilpatrick once upon a time the Story goes a Young woman became attracted to the Art of Flower arrangement. She fared poorly in competitions and at last asked a judge for advice. The judge gave her three envelopes to be opened one at a time when she next tried her hand. The message in the first envelope read take out half of your Flowers and rearrange the  she did so. The second message was like unto the first take out half of your Flowers and rearrange the  she did so. The third message was the same. She followed the instructions and won first prize. This is a parable for writers. I thought about it the other Day when some ninth Grade students in a Maryland Junior High school sent me a list of 14 sentences sentences they were proud of from the stories they had written in their English class. They asked for my com ments. Among the sentences mesmerizing the already dazed Driver the Ruth less pair of uniform Windshield wipers marched Methodi Cally Back and Forth across the dappled Field of  the Many aisles of the run Down movie theater seemed to whisper of past audiences that once flocked to the now desolate  gliding smoothly glaciers of butter slide Over and Down the sides of the hot Flaky Golden  Down a slope into a Forest of moguls the Graceful skier slithered to the hot Cocoa awaiting him  seemingly effortlessly the Long supple fingers glided swiftly across the piano s keyboard each phalanges dancing with a life of its  under the full Moon Silver hued wraiths flitted about among the Ivy covered gravestones in the dark Musty cemetery a favorite haunt of ancient  what is a critic to say one begins by praising these 15-year-Olds for their spelling commending them for their Effort and urging them to keep at it. What else does one say too Many Flowers. Take out half the adjectives and rearrange the rest. Beware the lure of Fine writing it is a temptation to which All writers now and then Are led but it is especially alluring to Young writers. They Are not Content with hot biscuits the biscuits must be hot Flaky Golden Bis  the skier must be Graceful the Cocoa must be hot. It is not enough to speak of wipers sweeping across a Windshield these Are a ruthless pair of uniform wind shield wipers marching methodically Back and Forth across the dappled Field of  too Many Flowers. In descriptive writing the trick is to leave something to the imagination of the Reader. Not everything needs to be spelled out. If a gentleman is kissing a lady on her lips it is not necessary to explain that her lips Are Ruby red and her Teeth Are Pearly White. One More thought we ought also to cultivate an ear for the word that sounds right. If we Are writing about Rachmaninoff s fingers i doubt that we want to speak of his dancing phalanges. Does a skier slither i do not ski and thus confess my ignorance but it sounds Odd. Be of Good cheer i would say to my Young friends in Maryland. It is far better to write effusive prose than not to write at All. C Universal press zookeeper praised As hero for tackling escaped Panther great Bend Kan. Up a zookeeper has been praised As a hero for pouncing on a 125-Pound Panther that leaped from its Cage at feeding time As horrified families looked on. Zookeeper Mike Brown was in Good condition at Cen trial Kansas medical Center after being mauled by the 16-year-old animal at Brit Spaugh zoo. Zoo director Jerry Tillery said Brown was standing on a catwalk behind the Panther s Cage preparing to drop meat through a ceiling Hatch when the beast jumped seven feet straight up and landed on top of the Cage. Brown pounced on the animal and called for help. Three other zookeepers and several City workers raced to the area. Zookeeper Doug Bert grabbed an 8mm Mau ser Rifle from the animal control Center and fatally shot the Panther. And you have a town Hall. Meeting at noon. Old a  Tobt tight. In Avetik. Incarm5l of i Promise 1h� cafe state chair 1 Pam a hat Palgon for a mayoral for candid the. An5w Comer nam5p Clint fast Loop. Clint ea5wioop? you it Campaign ing for Ai mi5t�r?Pau 5/ty5 yours Kex Juthe a.tquri5t5 Coulp 05, no. 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