European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - June 3, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Aka teen new to if  Gap number of Row i wow in the a York mfr Poulan am in much tag group who Are n 1970 38 to 44 45tom 1980 35 to 44 ta54 men 129,056 single women coping with a void by Jane Gross new York times Here is a single woman in new York Bright and accomplished who dreads Nightfall when darkness hugs the City and lights go on in warm kitchens. She knows better than to 1hmk that Happy families Miall those Bright moms because her married friends Tell her otherwise As do authorises As diverse As masters and Johnson and Irving Berlin and she Toves her the of hard Wor and Good friends of stimulating Days that end with cultural events gymnasium workouts or takeout chinese food and a soak in the tub. Set just months from her 40lh birthday she finds that the fantasy lugs at her As it does at so Many among the growing ranks of single women who find they outnumber single men Al just he Lime that their biological to rfcs Are ceding Ine loudest. These women Are part of a scrutinized subculture in now York cily and across the a i Ion As unmarried women their numbers increasing complain bitterly about their love lives and 1hnn marriage prospects. They Are the achievers largely upper Middle class and College educated the i isl daughters of the feminist movement to move in Waves into traditionally Malo professions. They seem to have it Al Glamour and Money and a modicum of Power and so their nagging dissatisfaction is a particularly Leiling statement about the loneliness of women who wore raised on dreams of weddings but came of age in far More complicated Rimes. We re great women everybody keeps telling us that said a Broadway actress maybe Thal s the problem. There s Only so Many people out there for  Many of these women never intended to be single and childless. They yearn for a family and tear growing old alone. They Date rarely and and Lewer suitable men now that they have gained professional stature and Learned to treasure Independence. They no longer organize Ofierr lives around Trie search for Prince charming. But in some Way Ine assume he is around Iho next Corner. Typical is a 39-year-old television producer i went Back to an old shrink recently and is asked me if i was Happy enough she said. I told him yes and no and that s really the truth. I love what Ida i love my friends. I love my apartment i have a Rich full life. I never sit Home Al night. Parl of me wonders if t could tie married o somebody now because i Hove such a Nice Lyle world. But i Haven t really slopped looking i d to lying if i said i d Given  two recent studies about the marriage prospects of these women spurred a flurry of Allenton by news organizations and a Rabid reaction from feminists who argued that Many women Are single by Choice. The first study by Neil a Bennett a Yale sociologist and David e Bloom a Harvard economist predicted that women past 30 have a 20 percent Chance o marrying and those Over 40 a 2 6 percent Chance. The other by the United states census Bureau raises the Odds at 30 years to 66 percent and at 40 to 23 percent. The studies prompted a debate about statistical techniques because Bennett and Bloom used an unconventional mathematical Model and a far smaller data base. To one disputed hat after he ago of 35, there Are simply More women than men. According to the 1980 census there were 167,000 unmarried women Between Trio Ages of 35 and 44 in the new York Region compared Wilh 129,000 unmarried men in the same age group. Ten years ago these women represented 18 percent of their age group and today they represent 29 percent a considerable increase according to Arlene Saluter a census Bureau blah Stilian precise Tigu reson unmarried business and professional women in now York Are not readily available. Salufer said the census Bureau does not break he statistics Down thai Way but she assumes Herr numbers Are generally reflected in the larger Sample. The reasons for the increasing ranks of single women experts say Are demographic social and psychological and include these those women were born in the baby Boom years nut York tis everal studies Over the years have conduct a that single wan Uii Are happier than their married fitter. Page 14 the stars and strikes and As they seek to marry men older than themselves As is common they find fewer around. This problem gets worse As women get older because d their longer Fife expectancy. While women tend to marry up both in age and status men tend to marry Down leaving a surplus of successful women particularly in the older age groups. Men classified As unmarried by the census Bureau include homosexuals who various studies show of number lesbians by at least 3 to 1. Many women thanks to the feminist movement no longer derive Ihei economic or social status from their husbands and therefore do no Rush Inlo Early marriages As often As their predecessors. Many single women in their 30s and 40s have histories of relationships with unavailable men frequently married ones. Women Wilt dead end poorly paid jobs seam to Sumer far More from their singleness. At a recent singles gathering Al a new York Myca for instance a Brooklyn schoolteacher expressed envy of another woman who worked As a Recruiter Lor a Wall Street Law firm. You sound like you re terrifically located to meet men said the teacher. The Recruiter answered win a grim chuckle and the Assurance thai she Loo had no one to go out with. Later the Recruiter conceded that despite a Lack of Dales her work put her in Contact with a varied cast of interesting people and her salary allowed such extras As health club memberships theater tickets and new clothes. When you have a Boring Day to Day Job dating becomes More important said Sollance Greer a social worker herself single and38 years old. You need someone to bring to you the kind of excitement that you re not creating  Bui even professional woman May feet a stigma in being single and Are reluctant to talk about their status. More than half of the two dozen women interviewed for this article insisted thai they not be identified. Many women said some dissatisfaction could Stem Tom others expectations. There s always a lingering doubt because of the Way we were brought up said Donna e. Sharafa. The 46-year-old president of Hunter College. Jeanne go by 46, said i did no Dawn on her until recently that she need not apologize for her life. Society said i should have a love relationship and when i did to i wondered what was wrong with me said Golly a marketing consultant. Then toward the age of 40,1 woke up and said. Hey i need to shift something Here and live this Lite for me not somebody else " living this we for me is an acquired skill that single women seem to gel better of with age. People who Are successful learn to Cope with is Lua Lions As they re presented and make the Best of to said the 39-year-old owner of a Public relations f irm who said she grows increasingly satisfied with her single life. These somewhat older women More often Han their wed Asda