European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - September 9, 1987, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Wednesday september 9, 1987 the stars and stripes Pago 9 jokes litter Long bumpy Trail to White House Washington and running fur president is no laughing Mailer and candidates take joking seriously buying borrowing and sometimes stealing gags to keep their c3mp.iifin speeches Snappy. Political Sumnr is a collage Industry in washing ton especially when the White House is up for grab. In a world or dreary speeches candidates yearn for sucks and often spend As much time trying to he funny As they do on foreign policy or kissing babies jokes Ore key explain Chris Matthews n for Mer aide to mired House speaker Thomas o Neill or. And part Lime joke writer for president Carter politicians Mill Ding to the Cardinal Rule of every Public speaker since Lime immemorial Start with a joke. Trouble is Matthews says even he funniest joke can i urn turgid in the hands of a politician who tells it As if he s Reading inc Federal budget. Politics is acting if you can t Tell a couple of Good jokes you should t be in the business mat thews now president of a lobbying firm said. The delivery is two thirds of the Ball game adds rep Morris Udall d-ariz., an acknowledged connoisseur of the political joke. The 26-year House Veteran who s campaigned for he nation s highest office himself has written a soon to by Sci cased Book wistfully titled too funny to be  Udall says being win in mule to tic White House has become almost .1 Consitt Ulinai require ment a tradition he said was nationalized by the Quick Tulip Kingjohn f. Kennedy. Udall recalls some of candidate Kennedy mom quoted remarks the Young senator accused  to buy his Way into inc White House with his father s riches quoted a supposed Telegram from dad Don t buy a single vote More than you need. I m not paying for a landslide. Asked How he became a War hero Kennedy whose it was destroyed by a japanese warship said it was involuntary. They Sank my  Udall says the need for fresh material keeps the Capitol Hill joke Mill grinding them out 31 n Pace that would exhaust Johnny Carson s staff. Political jokes often based on current events have a shelf life of about 48 hours Udall said. I be seen pm circulate around the House in about 4i  candidates rely on speech writers and other staff members to provide jokes. Some use professional gag writers at least one Washington firm offers a joke service to paying customers. Candidates also borrow or outright a pc their material from others they encounter on the Chicken Biitner circuit. C in pain Advance people in Nimi tic it to smoothing me Way for inv in Bosses Wex petted to keep their ears open. Sometimes the joke can be in the Jokester like last month when two democratic presidential con tenders told the same Story to he same audience on the same Day. Tennessee sen. Albert Gore jr., telling an anecdote about an Overly egotistical politician was humbled himself when he Learned rival Bruce Fiah Hitt had beaten him to the punch line but hot Bill the sex Ari Ona governor who claims the Story about a humorous encounter with a waiter actually happened to him. Was present when Gore told it at a roast just weeks before. Gore while he May have been first with the waiter Story Gol caught red handed earlier this year appropriating a Udall classic. That one As told by Udall recalls the candidate having car trouble on a snowy new Hampshire Day in inc midst of stumping for the state s crucial Pri Mary election. Not wanting to miss the Chance to glad hand a few potential voters the congressman popped into a local Barbershop announcing hello i m to Udall. I m running for  we know. We were just laughing about that came the reply. 100 injured during riots at 2 belgian prisons police round up inmates at Forest prison in a Nihon Lithium after s riot sunday. Brussels Belgium a riots at two belgian prisons injured about 100 people monday one Day after a four hour rebellion at another prison authorities said. The most serious riot monday was at the Saint Gills Penitentiary in Brussels where police said 400 of the 330 inmates refused to return to their cells after the 5 . Walk and began setting fires in various places. Red Cross officials said about 100 people were slightly injured and two were seriously wounded. At the Peak of the rioting fires were burning in several wings and on different floors. Firemen reported the damage was extensive and prison officials said More than 300 of the inmates would have to be transferred toothed jails. Police firing tear Gas restored order by 9 40 . The second riot occurred at the prison in leu Van when the evening exercise period for inmates was revoked. That disturbance ended when the order Given because of the other riots was rescinded. On sunday about 150 prisoners rebelled at the for est prison also in Brussels and officials said 25 people were injured before police gained control following a four hour rampage. In the Saint Gilfus and Forest prison riots the in mates protested overcrowding and what they consider inc privileged treatment that will be Given to 2ti Bri tons at leu Van prison. The britons Are to be extradited soon for trial in the Battles Between British and italian soccer fans in 1983 at Brussels heysel stadium in which 39 people were kilted. The Forest prison riot involved about 150 inmates of the 600 held there and officials said about half of the 25 people injured were policemen. A poster waved by rioters a i of Cost prison said the British hooligans will gel a three Star prison. We arc treated like  there were British expressions of concern that the British suspects would not receive fair treatment and on Friday Justice minister Jean Gol invited journalists to visit the leu Van prison. They saw Bright and airy cells. Gol on monday denied Lull the britons Jio Hai c been charged with manslaughter would Reedine favored treatment. Germany thanks Syria Iran for helping free captive Bonn up West Germany s for eign minister tuesday thanked the Syri an and iranian governments Tor their role in freeing one German hostage from Captivity in Beirut Lebanon and urged them to help retrieve a second hostage Siemens electronics technician Alfred Schmidt 47, armed in West Germany shortly after Midnight tuesday less than 24 hours after Hejnig freed from eight months of Capri Vii. Picked up in Damascus a Ria by West German Interior ministry official Hans Neussl Schmidt was flown in a German military Jet to c Olone Bonn Airport and then taken by helicopter to a nearby Tjurman military Haw. Fur the night. He has nut been seen h re porters since his arrival and was expected to continue his journey to West Berlin Dur ing the Day to visit his Mother. In a bavarian television broadcast monday evening lebanese born West German businessman Rashid Marroum said he arranged the payment of a $5 million Ransum to win Schmidt s free Dom. West German government sources have denied West Germany made an Deal with the lebanese kidnapper 10 Swap the to German hostages for suspected lebanese Hijacker Mohammad a i Hamari. Him has been imprisoned since i Surrem in Frankfurt last Jan. 13. Marroum who has functioned As an intermediary Between the West German government and the lebanese hostage takers also said he expected i he second German Luis acc. Bloc chs chemical executive Rudolf fondest be freed within i i Days. Sii Laic Mannjay the chancellery of bavarian minister president fran Josef Strauss Saij sir Audi s outstanding fun facts to Syria played a key Rule in the  foreign minister Hans Dietrich Fin a her in a statement thanked syrian 1  Leaf in a Assad. Iranian parliament president a a Sfanjani and the foreign ministers of lit two countries