European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - August 28, 1989, Darmstadt, Hesse                                The stars and stripes Page 11 Arm Landers Ann Landers is on vacation. The following columns a rerun. Her regular column will resume september 3. Dear Ann Landers two months ago i married a very successful and respected businessman. He is several years my senior and the first Man i have Ever been intimate with. He seemed perfectly Normal until he slapped me around because i struggled to keep him from pinning clothes pins to my breasts and Bottom. Several times he has tried to tie me to the bed and suggested the clothespins routine. I refused on the grounds that it is not Normal. He argued that since i Nave never been intimate with another Man i did t know what was Normal and what was not. He explained thai such love play is called female bondage and All the women he had made love to before enjoyed it. Recently he ripped my clothes off and started knocking me around. I became frightened packed my bags and left. A few Days later he sued me for divorce. His grounds Are that i refused to be a wife to him. I am afraid of his Power and Money so i hesitate to Tell my Side of the Story. He might make me out to be a nut and ruin my reputation please advise me Ann. Seeking Justice dear just what you describe is not Normal love play. It is Sadis tic sick and Kinky. Don t allow the Man s Money or prestige to intimidate you. Get an attorney Tell him the whole Story and throw the Book at the Dingbat. Dear Ann Landers i have two cats. I love them very much. When Panda and Ellic die i plan to Bury them in a pet cemetery. The problem is that when i die i want them reburied next to me in a people cemetery. Can i do this or is there some Law against it together in heaven dear heaven i checked your letter out with my funeral maven and this is what he said " together in heaven is apparently a very senti mental person. The Odds Are Good however that it would be a lot easier for her to find a pet cemetery that would allow her to be buried in it than a cemetery for humans that would agree to let her cats Panda and Eilie go along with her to the grave. The reason for this is that the relatives of other deceased people would take a dim View of burying their loved ones next to animals. Every cemetery has its own Constitution however and together just might find one that would agree to go along with her  a Sil dear thanks for the counsel. And now another thought occurs to me. If Ellie and Panda predeceased together they would have to be embalmed and dug up assuming together found a cemetery that would take All three. Who would do the embalming if together should die first Ellie and Panda would have to be put to death to be burled with their mistress. Would the Spca allow such a thing i think not. I Hope together will rethink All aspects of this situation before she starts to Call up cemeteries and ask them about their constitutions. Confidential to rat Fink and proud of it but where do 1 go from Here i Don t know but you la probably go there alone. You be lost two Good friends for sure and maybe four. If you Don t Leam to keep your big Yazoo closed after this experience you re a hopeless Case Buster. Letters policy on Tours and families discussed it is High time that Congress did indeed take a hard look at the number of military family members residing overseas specifically in the european theater. The figures cited in a recent article indicate an approximate 1 1 ratio Between military personnel and family members in the european theater. This is potentially a Gross impediment to combat readiness. I doubt that any other forces deployed in a Forward defense location certainly neither the soviets in East Ern Europe nor the South africans in Namibia suffer from such an encumbrance. How Are you going to quickly move More than 300,000 family members out of harm s Way in the event of a Surprise Warsaw pact attack do you really think that most  will be Able to fully concentrate on wartime duties if they arc not reason ably assured of their families safety hell no the services preached people orientation for so Long that the renewed emphasis on Mission orientation will require More time to properly take hold. The air Force s Neo non combatant evacuation order pro Gram looks Good on paper but will never work if the balloon actually goes up since you can t legally subject family members to military discipline. But we do not need a congressional kick in the butt to solve this problem the Dod is quite capable of fixing it. I favor linking command sponsorship to tour length and giving service members some Power to choose longer Tours in Exchange for command sponsorship. First we need to standardize the definition of Tours As quantified in the following suggested table first termer career member sponsored Short tour i year 2yeats no Standard tour 2 Yuan 3 year no Long tour 3yean 4 years yes clarification we need to distinguish Between first Wermers and career members. Because first Wermers inherently do not sign their papers with their eyes wide open they Are still adjusting to the military system. More flexibility is appropriate to help them adjust. Besides us lifers were All first Wermers once upon a time. A Short tour would be available Only at Remote locations and would be the Only option available at such locations. A married  tasked for a Standard tour could Volunteer to change it to a Long tour in order to qualify for command sponsorship. The scr in member would have to elect this option prior to reporting to the overseas location. Renegotiate status of forces agreements As Nec Essary to permit the Host nation to prevent non com Mand sponsored family members from joining their sponsors for purpose of residence. However Short vis its would naturally be permitted. To compensate married service members who elect the Standard tour permit them one free trip to the Stales annually to visit their families. This would take priority Over Ordinary leave although remaining chargeable As such and would normally be granted unless there was an escalation of the Deacon de sense condition status or worse. Several benefits would immediately be realized. First most married members might elect the Long tour. Longer Tours mean less frequent moves and reduced moving costs to the government. Second those who elected the Standard tour would not have their families with them at government expense. The Money we squander now on remodelling officers clubs no clubs teen centers and such could be diverted towards providing Quality housing for peo ple already in place particularly the single member. Many of our single members at Remote stations arc huddled in Cro Magnon Vintage Barracks. It is obscene to think about teen centers when some of our Active forces still live in slums. Finally the reduced number of family member would make an evacuation More manageable and everyday support activities such As child care and healthcare will be More widely available and of higher Quali  is the Type of fat we need to think about Cut Ting. Denying service members realistic pay raises Cut Ting our troop strength and curtailing training is not cutting fat it s cutting muscle. If we continue to Cut muscle we will drive out All the achievers and be left with nothing More than a Bunch of Parade ground Nincompoop who May be wizards with the pen but use less with the Rifle. Tech. Sgt. Carl j. Loerbs Kapaun air station West Germany editor s note col. John w. Querfeld chief. Enlisted division office of the Deputy chief of staff for personnel department of the army replies the army is increasingly becoming a married Force. Army personnel policy must Lake this demographic fact into account. Soldiers want to be with their families. There ii no indication that the presence of family members impedes readiness. In fact readiness in in rope has steadily improved. In addition morale is in creased by family presence. The United Stales has worldwide commitments and different family values than other nations. In this re Spect it is difficult to compare the family member poli cies of other nations to this nation s. Despite the fad that army forces Are Forward deployed in Europe the probability of War is very Low. Risk is a key consideration in determining if dependents should be restricted from an overseas area. The army has a responsibility to perform the mis Sion yet be sensitive to the needs of soldiers and their families promote professional development and con serve permanent change of station monies. Current tour length and family member policies take these factors into account. Life in Remote military area described picture this a 29-person military station in Southern Italy that produces its own Power 24 hours a Day and is charged with broadcasting a us Cable navigational signal to be used by All nations. The nearest commissary Exchange and English speaking Hospital Are a Long five hour drive away. The majority of members must live on the local Economy. No government owned or leased housing is available. A Small Barracks is provided for a limited number of single members. Afro and an cannot be received. I be just described . Coast guard Worsta Scalia Marina Italy. Yes the smallest armed service is pre sent in Europe. I for one. Am enjoying a two year accompanied tour. I would just like to give a Little advice to the people who write in every Day and com Plain about How rough they have it living on or around big military installations. Stop crying and enjoy what you have because it could be a lot worse. Petty officer 2nd class Matthew d. Fulk .c.g. Worsta Selma Marina Italy main office switchboard 061sm010. Ets 348-5741 or 5823 w 5747. For departments Dill 06155-601 Oka Extension or its number and a a european edition cd. Jeffrey u. Cook. Usa cd Tymander editor Nachlel it col Suzanne l Phillips Usan Deputy Cammander Earlor in cowl Marie Kominicki Mert Proctor Deans  production manager managing editor cd Reulman manager tows newspaper u in but norried unman Pum Cunn Lor members Olim it fury Unton oversees. Contents the Sura and stripes i not necessarily the official views of. Or endorsed by. Me . Government the department of Detent or Tea . European command. The appearance of advertising in a pub Cajon. 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