European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - April 14, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Last laugh Page 24you Are John q. Public Dave Barry Knight Ridder newspaper i hate to bring this up but a lot of you members of the Public have a bad attitude. Consider the following True Story which was told to me recently by my attorney Joseph Quot Joe the attorney Digiacinto of White i Ains n.y., who by the Way is available \ for hire although he of course is far too ethical to advertise. Joe has a client whom ill Call Charles a mild mannered corporate financial officer who has never been in any kind of trouble. One evening Charles was driving Home from work on the new England thruway and came to a toll Plaza. When his turn came he pulled up to the Booth and held out his $1.25, at this Point the toll taker pulled out what Charles described according to Joe As a the biggest pile of $1 Bills i have Ever seen a and started slowly counting them. A minute went by. The toll taker kept counting. Some people behind Charles started honking. Another minute went by. Charles sat there looking in disbelief at the toll taker who apparently planned to Contin us counting the entire pile of Bills and then who knows maybe read a War and  in the lengthening line behind Charles More people we Cre honking shouting gesturing possibly rummaging through their Glove compartments in search of firearms. Finally Charles despite being mild mannered did a bad thing. In fact he did three bad things 1 he made an explicit no toll related suggestion to the toll taker 2 he threw his $1.25 into the Booth and 3 he drove away. A / he did not get far of course. Western civilize Tori did not get where it is today by tolerating this kind of flagrant disregard of toll procedures. Charles was swiftly apprehended by two police cars which escorted him to the police station where he called Joe who managed to keep him out of prison through the shrewd Legal Man Euver of telling him to pay the $50 Fine. So Justice was done but this Story illustrates my Point about the bad Public attitude. Too Many of us Are like Charles guilty of assuming that everything is set up for our Benefit. We come to a toll Plaza we Sec a person standing in a toll Booth and we expect to just hand our toll to this person. We fail to consider that this person might have other things to do and that it might be More convenient for him or her if we came Back and. Paid our toll later. / i am fed up with complaints about postal clerks. Just because a person works for the postal service in a Job called a postal clerk a standing behind the Post office service counter  mean this person has nothing better to do than help you conduct postal transactions. Recently while i was waiting in line at a Post office to Purchase the new conveniently priced 29-eent Stamps i was shocked to hear people muttering because the three clerks behind the counter were moving so slowly that to the untrained Eye they did not appear to be. Waiting in anybody. When i heard people complaining 1 got angry. A listen a i wanted to shout. A if you done to like. Standing in line for 45 minutes while these clerks fulfil what is apparently some kind of postal. Service requirement to display the same Energy level As linoleum take your business to some other postal service a but of course i did t shout because it would have violated a postal regulation and they might have put me in prison or a worse a sent me to the end of the line. The most serious Public attitude problem 12 have encountered was in a Florida department of motor vehicles facility where i was attempting to renew my Driver s License 1 heard a lot of ill mannered grumbling from members of the Public especially the ones who had been there More than three Days. Again this was a situation where just because these people had been told that they could renew their licenses at this facility they expected to just Waltz in and a talk about Gall a renew their licenses. You can imag Ine How irritating this was for the department of motor vehicles employees who already had their hands Tull with their other duties which include taking Breaks informing you that whatever line you be been standing in for the past hour its the wrong one arid taking additional Breaks. A. I must confess that even i started to develop an attitude problem after a couple of hours. When i finally got to the front of the right line and the clerk asked if i wanted to be an Organ donor i almost screamed a no i want to donate your organs a but fortunately i restrained myself. The Only indication of How i Felt is photo wherein Hook like Charles Manson Only less rational. This is Good. A major purpose of motor a chicle department procedures is to make sure that All Drivers including nuns look like Charles Manson. In their License photos. Several states considered issuing licenses with Manson photos reprinted on them but this was rejected because it would make the License is suing process too efficient. My Point is that you members of the Public. Need to Stop assuming that government has nothing better to do than serve you. You also need to straighten out your attitude toward the phone company. Also hospitals. Hospitals would be a lot More pleasant for people who work in them if you did no to keep coming in with medical problems. And done to forget about newspapers. We re sick and tired of you telling us you did no to get your paper. Hey we have enough trouble printing the paper we can to worry about whether you actually receive it. So just shut up with your complaints. You re in the wrong line anyway. 2 Williams iced pm by glad a Quot say it or. O Brien. Be failed Haven 11tno kidding informants and the internal Revenue service no. Of reported violations 10,757 no of informant claims accepted 635 rewards paid to informants $2.7 million taxes recovered $126 million source internal Revenue service a a All figures Are let or the 1990 tax year Only . Presidents born in a Hospital Jimmy Carter George Bush source world features Syndicate Sedini at l 14. 1931