European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - October 21, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse Page 20 a the stars and stripes monday october 21,1991 i Ann Landers dear readers remember that letter about the three Sisters who were in Sharp disagreement As to what should be done about their 91-year-old father the Man was senile and had not recognized anyone in a year. He also had been refusing food for several months. The doctor wanted to insert a feeding tube saying a a papa would die if he did t get some protein soon. Two of the Sisters insisted that tube feeding was indeed a life support and that their father would not want it. I suggested that perhaps their fathers ref Kisal to eat May have been his Way of expressing the wish to die. Then the roof fell in. That letter and my comments brought Forth an unprecedented deluge of highly charged responses. Obviously a tremendous number of readers Are passionate about the subject and with Good reason. Here Are two examples of what my week has been like dear Ann Landers i strongly disagree with your advice regarding the 91-year-Oid Man whose daughters were fighting about whether he should be kept alive by tube feeding. My Mother is 97 and has t known any of us for three years. Sixteen months ago we instructed the doctor to put in a feeding tube when he told us she would die without it. It is costing us a lot of Money to keep mama alive. We Are All scraping the Bottom of the barrel. Some of the Gran kids wont be Able to go to College and i May lose my Home but the lord liveth and the lord Tabeth away and he will take mama when he wants her. Until today a crossword dear Abby dear Abby my husband is bisexual. I have known it since the third year of our marriage but i expected him to be faithful so i figured his fantasies were his own business. Well As it turns out he has not been faithful and he is his positive we have two Small children and he is a Good father. We have a lot in common we rarely fight and i love him. But now the big problem to be Blunt i would miss the sex and will not be unfaithful. Also there is the whole aids problem. Will he get sick will he infect me or the kids can my children have their friends Over should 1 be sterilizing the dishes and the towels what and when do we Tell the kids our families he wants to slay married now i m not sure i do. I have been to a Counselor several times and 1 still can t make up my mind. Please do not publish my name or location for obvious reasons his wife dear wife i directed your questions to or. Merv Silverman then it is up to us to keep her alive. Oregon dear Ann Landers i owe it to my fathers memory to respond to the letter about the old Man whose daughters were arguing about his being kept alive by tube feeding. My dad passed away recently after five months in a nursing Home. His hands had to be tied to the bed because he insisted on pulling the feeding tube out. They kept putting it Back in even though this 97-year-old Man told them repeatedly that he wanted to die and begged them to a Stop doing All these terrible things to his Throat was so badly scarred by the tube that he could no longer Swallow. Surgery was performed and a stomach feeding tube was inserted. We pleaded with the doctor and the Hospital authorities to remove the stomach tube but they said once it has been put in it cannot be taken out because it is a life support and removing it is against the Law. After 12 trips to the Hospital and two surgeries to put the stomach feeder in the surgeon said a the cannot stand any More operations and is begging me to let him die. I will not allow anyone to Force another tube into this Many a body although some religious fanatics and health care people might see it differently in my Book that doctor is a Saint. Within six Days dad went into a coma and died peacefully. At his bedside i repeated those famous words of or. Martin Luther King a free at last. Thank god he is free at been there in Birmingham c creators Syndicate president of the american foundation for aids research. His response a unless More effective treatments arc developed eventually almost All his infected individuals will have symptoms and ultimately aids. A the Only Way your husband can infect you is through unprotected penetrative sexual activity. Will he infect the children no. A your children can have friends Over and it is not imperative that dishes and towels be sterilized. Studies of households with an infected individual have shown absolutely no transmission of the virus unless there was unprotected sexual activity with the infected person. A what and when to Tell your children depend upon their Ages. Since a person can look and feel Well for years it is probably not necessary to Tell your Small children until the symptoms Start appearing. A what and when to Tell your families depend upon the relationship you have with those family members. Remember however that this disease is very difficult to Deal with As to whether you should stay married Only you can make that decision. Regardless you should be tested for his because if you have been infected you too should be under a doctors supervision. C Universal press Syndicate across 1 Barbecue items 5 Heidi s Home 8 Check 12 College professor 14 White tailed Eagle 15 Garden of Eden 16 dresses Coin edges 17 Legal matter 18 conjures up 20 revolutionary Allen 23 Small Merganser 24 Jezebel a husband 25 affixes 28 pirate s drink 29 Marks to let stand 30 polish vigorously 32 appoints As an agent 34 a and hounds 35 mimicked 36 author Alexandre 37 chinese religion 40 a wrestling 41 word before horse or curtain 42 plane curve 47 baseball team 48 panegyric 49 All Over 50 one of the Caesars 51 Odin and Loki Down 1 colleague 2 mrs. Cantor 3 gov. 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