European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - December 27, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse Columns some old acquaintances can t be forgotten by John Windrow staff columnist new year s is lots Fuller sire pm not a bartender anymore. Some arc born to bar tending others have it thrust upon them. I found myself unemployed in san Francisco a few years ago and enrolled in bar tending school. I Don l think the Guy who ran it had Ever poured a drink for anybody but himself but As they say in graduate school those who can t do teach. The rejoinder is that those who can t teach go to graduate school the Only thing i remember learning was that the Sidecar made from Brandy and Cointreau was so named because Sacco and Vanzetti were supposed to have fled the South Braintree mass., shoe factory robbery in the Sidecar of a motorcycle. It was t True but it was a Clever Way to induce someone to order a Sidecar which was one of the few drinks i could make when i graduated. This turned out to be handier than one might think. I found that people Are forever walking into bars and saying what s Good today or i just Don t know what to drink this Well How about a Sidecar i d say quickly. You remember the Sacco and Vanzetti Case Don t you i worked for a Brief time in a dance Hall North of Berkeley. It would have been of but the head bartender was always armed and always drunk. It me nervous. Hen got Lucky and ended .1 Job a a cushy spot or. Jack London Square in Oakland. It was right on the waterfront and the Rich people would tie their yachts up in front of the bar and Arnste in for a Cuba Libre or a tequila Sunrise i a hard time pushing sidecars there the Rich Don t sympathies with Sacco and Vanzetti. I Learned n very valuable1 lesson there the Rich Aren t like you and me they have More time to drink. The first new year s eve i worked there one of the Rich Guys a japanese american named mad Eddy took me out on his yacht after i closed to hit a few of the Al night spots on the Oakland Side of the Bay. Mad Eddy said he was named for the last Kamikaze Pilot. Boy was he mad my Eddy used to say. He claimed to have owned the Only liquor store in Oakland that Ever went broke. If i sold one bottle out of the front of the dump my friends drank three out of the Back he said. He had inherited his Money and liked to let people take advantage of him. It made him feel generous. I was deeply honoured to get to go out on his yacht. Usually he took Only the cocktail waitresses. I moved across the Bay and took a Job on the Corner of first and Market at a place called or. Toad s. I did t mind the name but we had to Wear Green vests. Mine was Way too big and i Felt like a Leprechaun. It was another High class joint full of lawyers stockbrokers and people who had brokers. The tips were so Good i lived in fear of the irs. We used to have brunches on new year s Day and serve Ramos i Zes. It s a new Orleans drink with Orange lower water egg White Lemon Juke sugar and in. Ladies love them As a Ruu. I was working Irre Wilh .1 bartender named Linsly who was so old he had invented inc Rusty Nail there was a gala crowd getting lubricated for the Bow games on to. The ladies kept sending Rny Ramos fies Back saying they weren t As a Noel is s. After pouring out a do in i asked him to watch me make one and Lei me what i was doing a Moriji i grabbed a tall Glass squirted in some Orange Flower water and Lemon Juke tossed in some ice and gub cd the Gin bottle. Lindy looked like i had picked up a Snake. Good lord have you been putting Gin in pm he hissed into my ear. We re trying to make Money in this dump i had a regular there named big Tom a Cook from tax Arjuna. One of his pals was ,1 Rich broker named Perry Winkle. Big Tom would drink Only too proof Bourbon straight and Perry drank scotch and milk. I could never understand what they had in common but they were wild about each other. Perry asked me to help him carry big Tom out to a cab one night. They did t Call him big Tom for nothing. We dropped him on a Light of Concrete stairs and he fell ail the Way to the taxi at the curb. He fell like an Oak Board smiling bouncing Down Enci Over end. Then he got up brushed himself off like nothing unusual was going on and told the cabbie his address. He was a gentleman All the Way Down. Neither one of them remembered it so i never brought it up. 1 intend to spend this new year s with my moroccan bartender. Maybe Well drink sidecars. I wonder if he knows Aboul Sacco and Van Etti. Social occasions invite etiquette questions by miss manners United future Syndicate the important thing about an invitation is not How it is expressed but the warmth with which it is offered. Everybody believes that except miss manners. Miss manners does not oppose warmth. A cold Hearth is a dreadful thing especially if you had hoped to Toast marshmallows. A cold heart when you have visions of snuggling up is even worse. But she believes it is also important that an invitation be Given and received properly. This is Only partly because miss manners takes an aesthetic if not sensual pleasure in handling thick creamy paper covered with stilted writing. She does not expect Many others to share that taste the Mere expression of which will do Little to endear her to a world in which informality is considered a virtue. Her other reason however is something that should make everyone fall in line behind her to demand the return of social formulae in invitations. That is that the original spontaneous casual invitation is totally incomprehensible to the person who receives it. You must come to dinner with us is Nice and warm but what does it mean it May not be an invitation at All but Only a statement of genial intent. Let s gel together come by and see us some evening and we must do something Are merely indications that an actual invitation will be made or welcomed in the future. A genuine invitation issued by voice or by mail includes a Date and a time you must come to dinner with us. How about saturday the 7th at 7 30?" this still leaves open such questions As who is expected to attend if the invitation is addressed to a couple can one if the other is not in town if Only one of the couple is invited is me other supposed to attend too May or should a single person bring a Date or House guest Are children included How much after the stated time is one expected to arrive will a full meal be served will it be served before everybody starves to death and or gets drunk if it says Buffet and i eat beforehand will i be sorry what sort of clothes should be worn docs anybody care is an answer to the invitation required and if so How should that be made How Long do i have to decide whether i want to go and can i get out of it after i have accepted miss manners has lots of sympathy with the bewildered guest provided he understands that All social invitations must be answered As quickly As possible and that once accepted they Are binding. Challenged on the Telephone to make an immediate answer he May stall for a Day or two let me Check the Calendar at the office of Mary said something about our being Busy that night but i m not sure i la have to ask Herbut not More. Written invitations demand a written reply in kind regardless of whether they contain instructions Nasty Little . Cards or threats. Invitations should be addressed by name to the people expected to attend even if that Means doing a Little research to find out whether that awful person your Friend seems to be living with has a name. Anyone who puts and guest or bring an escort deserves what he generally gets. Fewer people than invited May attend Annabelle s at a convention then but i d love tout permission must be requested for others does this include the children i Don t know if you be heard that Timothy and i Are a couple now of i can t because i la be having a House guest but actually i d love you to meet her Wilh the understanding that it May be politely withheld of dear i be already got a full table. An invitation with an arrival time Only should mean it and not say 7 when food will be served at 10 45. Dinner invitation times should be stated and taken seriously with guests arriving within 15 minutes and dinner served 45 minutes later. The word dinner is used to indicate that you need t defrost anything for later cocktail parties and receptions Only Promise to stave off hunger although they can stuff you if they like Only parties Wilh arrival and departure limes 5 to 7 Grant an hour s leeway. Hosts cannot be Coy Aboul telling people what to Wear. Of anything Means even less than we re very informal which has no meaning Al All unless there Are such Strong regional or group customs that everyone invited knows informal Means. Change into something smashing after work or whatever you jog if the hosts Don t state their terms the guests must demand to know what they Are wearing. Traditional invitations were always rather dry but they enabled both hosts and guests to know the terms on which the evening would be conducted. It is More fun to save spontaneous overflow of warmth and originality for the party itself. Feeling incorrect address your etiquette questions to miss manners in care of the Stan and stripes Apo 09217, . Forces. December 27,198s stripes Magazine
