European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - February 22, 1989, Darmstadt, Hesse Continued from Page 13 called the Charm however Paola Harrell wife of a Frankfurt brigadier general said the annual course is far from a Charm course and compared it to spouse courses offered by Xerox ism and general motors. It s to familiarize you with the army at the senior level Harrell said. It has nothing to do with being a female or although still included in the army courses at Vilseck and fort Leavenworth protocol training has lessened in importance. What army courses Don t provide in protocol training the wives clubs make up for. At a conference of the american women s activities Germany last May women even could choose from protocol i or protocol ii workshops in which they discussed topics such As proper etiquette for responding to written invitations and going through receiving lines. In fiscal 1988, 81 women attended the army s course which is offered eight times a year at Vilseck s army training Center to coincide with the battalion commanders course. Although they were Welcome to attend no husbands or battalion commanders came. Army training come officials could not provide figures on the Cost of putting women through the voluntary course saying that it depended on How far the women were travelling to attend. They receive invitational travel orders to attend with their spouses said course director sgt. 1 St class Velma Powers. Fort Leavenworth handles the course the same Way. After listening to repeated remarks about the army s investment in the women at a pre command course one wife asked a general at the course what would happen if a woman failed to fulfil her responsibilities As a brigade or battalion first lady. She wanted to know who bore responsibility for that failure. After a verbal tap dance the general replied ultimately your that the woman said is like having someone hold your child by his neck in midair saying do it or i squeeze contributing to this report staff writer Chuck Vinch in Washington a owns adapt to women of today by Rosemary Sawyer staff writer ears ago women joined officers wives clubs because it was something you just did said a Veteran army officer s wife. There weren t As Many wives working out of the Home and that was just what you did. Then As we progressed and More wives began to work that changed completely said Shirley eanes of Heidelberg West Germany who s had 24 years to witness the change. Mary Shields of Rhein main a West Germany said she remembers the time she automatically became a wives club member when her husband joined the officers club. But like her army counterpart Shields says those Days Are Over. Women s clubs have adapted to the women of today. We be come a Long Way baby she said. I Don t think there s a stereotypical own member anymore. They come if they want to although Many officers wives acknowledged lessening expectations for club membership they remained divided on whether women still feel pressure to join be it real or perceived. Compared to civilian women s clubs there s still an expectation to join said Linda Evans wife of a major formerly stationed in Frankfurt West Germany. I think there Are some people who Are there because they think this is a part of what they re supposed to be doing said Bonnie Clevenger child development services coordinator in Schweinfurt West Germany. Women join the club for a million different reasons said Priscilla Trawick who headed the Frankfurt american women s club last year. Some join to socialize. Some join because it s an obligation like when your kids were in school you Felt you should be part of the others join to receive the club s newsletter take classes it offers bowl in the club s league or enrol their children in its gymnastic classes Trawick an army colonel s wife said. The 300 or so Active members of Rhein main a s club of 1,200 really enjoy being there because they want to be there said the club s former president Cathy Maloney. Mary Stephenson of bad Kreuz Nach West Germany said her interest varies by club it depends on who s running them. To me it s like the Church it depends on who the preacher and even clubs led by Good preachers can suffer under a stereotype. I Don t think people really understood that it was not just Tea and crumpets in the afternoon that officers wives clubs Are hard working organizations said Margie Stolte of Zaragoza a Spain. Throughout the Community they re referred to As a Bunch of ladies who get together and go out to eat and Crook their Little fingers and gossip or talk because they Don t have anything else to do Evans said. A couple bad apples can feed that negative stereotype said kit Lupinski of Torrejon a in Spain. A wife who wears her husband s rank on her shoulder is really a wife that Sticks out in people s minds and they stereotype us. There Are wives who Are Only interested in talking with other officers wives and they re not really interested in knowing anyone Alex Mulkern president of the Allied officers wives club in Naples Italy said the clubs have grown much less formal and rank oriented. Nobody advocated disrespect it seems to be More breaking of the barriers said Mulkern a commander s wife. Another Navy commander s wife Shirley Lewis agreed saying that until about four years ago a husband s rank determined what a woman could or could not do in a club. Before she came to Naples for example she knew of a club in which a lieutenant s wife could not serve As club president. Sometimes referred to As the Only game in town the clubs fulfil a support function for women in a foreign country. Everyone acts As your own family and you become closer said Sarah Tuckett a Captain s wife from Zaragoza. You have a need for these organizations in Are Here than you do in the United states the men Are gone a lot said Carolyn Stevens from Rhein main. Therefore you need that camaraderie because you never know what might come club members say the support does t Stop with the clubs members but reaches into the Community. We have a social function every month that s fun and we get together but we raise Money and we contribute Money to All sorts of activities on base and outside the base said Stolte. I Mccombs of bad Kreuz Nach said in her 21 years with the army she s watched the clubs move from More of a social club to a Community help a Good example of a club s fund raising Power is the $103,000 that the Frankfurt club raised and poured Back into its Community in scholarships and special projects in 1987. And that s just the Cash measurement the wives Many Volunteer hours carry no Price tag. The senior officers wives say they be also noticed More and More clubs Are changing their names to say spouses and not just wives although they say few men participate. They also noted the clubs Are holding More evening functions to accommodate working women. Working women Are still signing up said Carolyn Stevens a High school teacher and officer s wife from Rhein main. They have chosen to join but still they re not As Active in it because they re pursuing their career goals Stevens said. But it does t say that they re not interested in what own is actually Annie Brauch of Wiesbaden West Germany said she wonders with so Many wives working and so Many activities if the clubs have outgrown their 1 then i look around and see that they Are doing Cpd by the scholarships they give and All the welfare projects. But i have to admit sometimes it does get to be a is Steve Morrison Many officers wives clubs raise Money for Community projects. Above members of the Heidelberg officers and civilians women s club present scholarships to High school graduates. Left in 1968 White gloves were an important accessory in the wardrobe of an officer s wife. File photo Down but not out by Rosemary Sawyer staff writer w earing White gloves an hats to social engagements May have gone out in the 1960s, but someone failed to Tell a woman who planned a White Glove function at Offutt fab neb.,a couple years ago. I had about three pairs of gloves recalled Cathy Maloney an officer s wife who was invited file photo past protocol included formal serenading of reassigned officers and fief wives. In 1969, the it Irmburg officers wives club music maids performed the duty with gusto. To the affair but a lot of the girls would Wear a Glove on one hand and they would pass them Down the receiving Lin because nobody had gloves and you could t find them because they weren t in Margie Stolte remembers receiving a Welcome packet in the mid-1970s for her impending tour in West Germany. After Reading that she must have calling cards White gloves and More the officer s wife now at Zaragoza a Spain said she wondered what she was getting into. Although she chose not to follow the packet s instructions and present herself at the Wing commander s House with a calling card on a Silver tray she heard about the wife of an Academy graduate who did. The base commander s wife was rather upset Stolte said. This was passe and she did t want All these Young wives walking in her door. It was a sign of the times we were the passing of the Glove and calling card Era comes As a Welcome death for most officers wives including one colonel s wife in bad Kreuz Nach West Germany who said she d show up wearing rubber gloves if invited to attend such an affair nowadays. However Many military rules of protocol still govern the social lives of officers wives despite etiquette s decline during the free spirited late 60s and Early 70s when Blue jeans replaced Black skirts As a fashion Staple. Officers wives still attend luncheons balls and occasional afternoon teas. They stand when a senior officer s wife enters arrange table seating according to seniority and remain at a party until the most senior officer has departed or at least the Well mannered do. Some officers wives in Europe even said they think military etiquette is on the Rise. We be lost a lot of the army tradition and the army protocol and the army social graces that had sort of fallen by the Wayside said Kaye Fry a battalion commander s wife from Gellhausen West Germany. We went through an Era where we re going to work we re not going to be army wives it s coming Back on a reverse the army recognizing the trend actually trains wives in customs courtesies and protocol Fry said. Courses for brigade and battalion commanders wives in fort Leavenworth kan., and Vilseck West Germany both offer some form of protocol training. Conversely Stolte said she thinks the air Force is trying to de emphasize customs and courtesies. Only a teens part on protocol was offered at a commanders spouses conference she attended. Ceil Abrams did t have the Benefit of such schools when her husband started his career. But training might not have prepared her for her first dinner party where she caught a major s wife checking out her taste in China by peeking at the underside of a dinner plate. Along her husband s 19-year-Road to regiment commander she has picked up More than rudimentary etiquette. Along with the do s and Don to of seating arrangements she s Learned the unwritten rules on acceptable table talk. For example when she suggested survivor benefits As a wives club luncheon topic the club members exclaimed Over lunch Joyce Fields said women welcomed a formal afternoon Tea she helped organize in nearby bad Kissinger even though no one was taking there Are some Nice throwbacks to the past Fields said of the Tea which was her second in 16 years. I think it s fun to do that once in a while and i think these Young wives thing afternoon teas still feature pouring schedules a novel concept for younger wives. The schedules bestow the beverage pouring Honor upon women based on their seniority and husband s rank. Coffee outranks Tea potato salad outranks Cole Slaw explained Kathy Pardew a teacher and senior officer s wife. For example the commander s wife pours first shift then the Deputy Community commander s Alex Mulkern president of the Allied officers wives club in Naples Italy said the Navy has More of a there s the Coffee pot pouring approach. I Don t think any of us want the traditions of the old army to change Pardew said. I m Brown shoe. I would like to get dressed up and put on White gloves and a hat every once in a while and go to a Tea party. All women like to get dressed kit Lupinski officers wives club president at Torrejon a Spain said women in her Community enjoy both the informal and formal with events ranging from country auctions to fancy dinners. As younger wives we be just never been involved with having to Wear White gloves having to be told that we have to do this. I think formal luncheons Are great but then again i enjoy wearing my overalls Lupinski said. This concludes our series on officers wives. Page 14 the stars and stripes wednesday february 22,1989 the stars and stripes Page 15
